Living as a wife - Introduction by Putri
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the story about the roller coaster live as a wife of a perfectionist man.
chapters
chapter 1:
Introduction
Introduction
chapter 1
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updated Feb 09, 2009
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I left my beloved city in the entire world-Jakarta in mid 2007. Soon after married I moved to Singapore with my husband who happened to be a singaporean citizen.
I was crushed at that time, scared and restless. But what choice did I have? The fact that I married non-indonesian man showed that I was ready to leave Jakarta with all my entire family there. And all of those things happened in the name of love.
I didn't even have a proper goodbye to Jakarta.
I always wanted to leave Jakarta for so many reasons, and one of them is that I coudn't handle the traffic, but when I finally left Jakarta, I really missed it and I still do.
My next destination was Singapore, is one of four remaining true city-states in the world and the smallest country in south east asia.
When I moved there in July 2007, it wasn't the first time I went there, I've been there before few times when My husband and I were dating.
I arrived at changi International Airport and it took approximately 1 hour from Jakarta to singapore with plane.
I remember at that time I carried like 2 giant suitcases and they were full of my clothes and my books.
And I arrived in a place called home. It was 12 floor-apartment complex (singaporean called it condominium) with white paint building and in the middle of the complex there was a huge swimming pool with a swirl pool attached to it and also there were gym that full of brand new equipments and 2 tennis courts and they were surrounded with palm tress and all the green plants. Which I liked.
Just hundreds metres from our apartment you can see big shopping mall with MRT as well as LRT station next to each other (and I could hear the trains screeching in the night and it was so annoyed and felt like living in one of those cardbox houses near railway somewhere in Jakarta, but soon I got used to it)
Our unit was 2 bed room-unit and the master bed room had en-suite, our living room was over looking the pool.
I never like the idea of living in a apartment, infact I loathe it, to be honest. For 27 year when I still lived with my parents and my brother and sister, we always had lived in a landed property.
I like to have a little space, I like to have a backyard where you can throw a little barbeque party once in a while or grow something like mint leaves or pandan leaves or mango tree or whatever or just a place to sit and smell the grass.
My husband being a singaporean thought that living in apartment was low maintenance because therefore we didn't have to mown the grass or watering plants or do the gardening. Well, I thought he was just a lazy bum spoilled by that kind of lifestyle.
The bottom line is I don't like apartment and I never will, full stop but sadly I am now still living in apartment somewhere in Sydney (maybe it's a curse for hating apartment and I doomed to live in it forever).
But the thing that was psych me more than living in apartment was living with your in-laws.
Yup, I lived with my in-law when I was there.
I never imagined in my wildest dream that marrying my husband meant that I have to marry his parents as well.
Sometimes I thought that it's better to have sort kind of agreements or at least same page of understanding before I decided to get married, unfortunately I never did that.
Born and brought up in Srilanka and coming from "the very conventional" srilankan family eventhough he's been living and traveling all over the countries but still he's an asian, to be precise an subcontinental kind of asian. No matter how high is his education, he's still conventional, eventhough he thought himself as a modern man (yeah right!). So in his culture, parents live with the son, and it's so much different with my culture where parents prefer to live with daughter (which I thought it's the most make sense thing).
For me, it was hard to live with my own mother especially when I reached 23 year old, our relationship was just like love and hate relationship, whenever she was not around I missed her but whenever she was there, we argued a lot
(my mother and I always thought that it was a generation gap).
I think she's now relief that I finally get married and moved from her place.
Living with my mother the person that I will always love was not easy let alone in-laws whom I knew nothing about.
And then all the story of my life began,.....
back to top
I was crushed at that time, scared and restless. But what choice did I have? The fact that I married non-indonesian man showed that I was ready to leave Jakarta with all my entire family there. And all of those things happened in the name of love.
I didn't even have a proper goodbye to Jakarta.
I always wanted to leave Jakarta for so many reasons, and one of them is that I coudn't handle the traffic, but when I finally left Jakarta, I really missed it and I still do.
My next destination was Singapore, is one of four remaining true city-states in the world and the smallest country in south east asia.
When I moved there in July 2007, it wasn't the first time I went there, I've been there before few times when My husband and I were dating.
I arrived at changi International Airport and it took approximately 1 hour from Jakarta to singapore with plane.
I remember at that time I carried like 2 giant suitcases and they were full of my clothes and my books.
And I arrived in a place called home. It was 12 floor-apartment complex (singaporean called it condominium) with white paint building and in the middle of the complex there was a huge swimming pool with a swirl pool attached to it and also there were gym that full of brand new equipments and 2 tennis courts and they were surrounded with palm tress and all the green plants. Which I liked.
Just hundreds metres from our apartment you can see big shopping mall with MRT as well as LRT station next to each other (and I could hear the trains screeching in the night and it was so annoyed and felt like living in one of those cardbox houses near railway somewhere in Jakarta, but soon I got used to it)
Our unit was 2 bed room-unit and the master bed room had en-suite, our living room was over looking the pool.
I never like the idea of living in a apartment, infact I loathe it, to be honest. For 27 year when I still lived with my parents and my brother and sister, we always had lived in a landed property.
I like to have a little space, I like to have a backyard where you can throw a little barbeque party once in a while or grow something like mint leaves or pandan leaves or mango tree or whatever or just a place to sit and smell the grass.
My husband being a singaporean thought that living in apartment was low maintenance because therefore we didn't have to mown the grass or watering plants or do the gardening. Well, I thought he was just a lazy bum spoilled by that kind of lifestyle.
The bottom line is I don't like apartment and I never will, full stop but sadly I am now still living in apartment somewhere in Sydney (maybe it's a curse for hating apartment and I doomed to live in it forever).
But the thing that was psych me more than living in apartment was living with your in-laws.
Yup, I lived with my in-law when I was there.
I never imagined in my wildest dream that marrying my husband meant that I have to marry his parents as well.
Sometimes I thought that it's better to have sort kind of agreements or at least same page of understanding before I decided to get married, unfortunately I never did that.
Born and brought up in Srilanka and coming from "the very conventional" srilankan family eventhough he's been living and traveling all over the countries but still he's an asian, to be precise an subcontinental kind of asian. No matter how high is his education, he's still conventional, eventhough he thought himself as a modern man (yeah right!). So in his culture, parents live with the son, and it's so much different with my culture where parents prefer to live with daughter (which I thought it's the most make sense thing).
For me, it was hard to live with my own mother especially when I reached 23 year old, our relationship was just like love and hate relationship, whenever she was not around I missed her but whenever she was there, we argued a lot
(my mother and I always thought that it was a generation gap).
I think she's now relief that I finally get married and moved from her place.
Living with my mother the person that I will always love was not easy let alone in-laws whom I knew nothing about.
And then all the story of my life began,.....
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