The Lost Empire - Chapter One by § Mallie §

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Story contest, 10/11/08



chapters

chapter 1: Chapter One


Chapter One
chapter 1   —   updated Apr 25, 2009   —   6851 characters   —   22 people liked this writing   —   17 reviews of this writing
The day started out just fine. Well, sort of. What I mean to say, is that the day started out fine, but not really. I was oblivious to the fact that the day wasn't fine at all, so I thought it was fine, but it really wasn't. Am I making any sense? Here, let me explain.

When I woke up, there was a slight drizzle outside, constantly ongoing for the next hour - I laid in my bed staring out the window. I finally got up, and the house was eerily silent, but I didn't notice. I just thought that it was nice, and peaceful, and, well, quiet. So, I continued making breakfast for my three older brothers and me.

As soon as noon struck, I knew something was up. No one was yelling upstairs that the radio I had turned on was too loud, and that they couldn't sleep. No one was stomping around, angry that it was raining so his date was canceled. No one was sitting at the table, watching me make breakfast. Warily, I walked through the house, checking every room, looking under all the beds, peeking in the closets. No one was home - Matthew, Luke and John (my brothers) had disappeared. My guardians were gone.

"You're being completely melodramatic, Rachel," I whispered to myself, "They're just playing a trick on you, and they're going to jump out and scare you." So, I waited for my three brothers to jump out and scare me. And I waited. And I waited. In fact, I waited for a few hours. The funny thing is, they didn't jump out and scare me. They didn't jump out. They didn't tickle my sides and say: "Good one, huh, Rachel? Gotcha!"

I wandered around the house the rest of the day, sitting down and watching a few hours of TV here, checking my e-mails there, all in a bit of a daze. What happened to my brothers? Where were they? Finally, around seven o' clock PM, I heard a stumble come from the front room and the door slam.

"Rachel!" I heard Matthew cry weakly, "Help!" I ran into the room, and saw Matthew sprawled out on the floor, blood staining the clean white carpet.

"Matthew!" I screamed, "What happened? Are you okay? Did you get shot?" Matthew shook his head, and lifted his gaze to look at me.

"Go get the first aid kit. And hurry! We have to get to Luke and John quickly!" Matthew commanded. I opened my mouth to protest, thinking that we should treat him first. But, I realized, if Luke and John couldn't even make it home, their situation had to be much more dire. So, I just scurried off, running upstairs to grab the first aid kit John had always kept under his desk. By the time I had gotten downstairs again, Matthew was sitting up, and tying a piece of cloth around his waist where the wound was. It wasn't a small, round hole - like the kinds bullets give - it was a wide slash across his abdomen. I recognized the cloth as the nice tablecloth that I set out at Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas breakfast.

"Where are John and Luke? What happened to you?" I demanded.

"I'll explain on the way. We have to hurry. Get your running shoes," Matthew said, slowly standing up. I sat down and struggled pulling on my shoes. By the time I stood up, Matthew was already at the door, and pulling my arm.

"What happened?" I asked, as we jogged along the street. Matthew's face was twisted in agonizing pain from his wound that was getting larger from the work he was exerting.

"This morning, there was the weird golden glow. The three of us decided to go investigate - you were still asleep, so we didn't wake you up. We got outside, and followed the...er...glow. When we reached it, we saw this giant, magnificent golden city spread out before us. These strange people were walking in and out of the buildings, and everyone was silent. Then they saw us. Apparently, they don't like outsiders much..." Matthew trailed off.

"Anyway, this city of sorts is an ancient empire called 'Shuzagee', I think it's derived from the Mayan - maybe Inca - empire, from their looks. And their methods of punishing trespassers. So, Luke is talking to this mother and she tells him that we'd better leave before the 'Kinna' hear word of our arrival. John insisted that we kept going, because, well, you know him. Being the sheep that we are, we followed him deeper into the city, and these men on huge - I mean gigantic - horses appeared. They grabbed us, and took us to this platform overlooking the city. Everyone in the city was watching with expectant expressions on their faces. John went first. They cut off his right arm, and did this ritual. I couldn't understand what they were saying - it was in an ancient language," Matthew cast a weary glance at me before continuing,

"Then it was Luke's turn. They - for lack of a better word - drew on him with a razor sort of thing, and sang a chant. I think they were going to dissect me. But, I guess we'll never know, because they didn't get very far. This man appeared - he looked more modern - and started talking to them in this weird language. I slowly edged towards the stairs leading down from the platform and ran all the way home. We're almost there." I looked up and noticed that there was a golden glow about the sky and land. A foreboding terror settled into my stomach, and my blood seemed to run cold, but I couldn't stop. I had to help Luke and John.

We came over a hill, and I saw it. A giant, golden city, shimmering with radiance and beauty. The people were also beautiful, seemingly waltzing between their chores, their dark hair dancing about their shoulders, their dark complexions nearly blending into the night. A man saw us approach.

"The sacrifice has returned!" He yelled, "With a woman sacrifice as well!"

"A light haired woman!" Everyone murmured, turning towards us. The horses that Matthew described approached, with the terrifying men atop of them. Matthew struggled, but he was no match for the huge horses, or the huge men. They took us to the platform, more like an altar. I spotted both dried and wet blood splattering the golden ground.

"Luke...John..." I whispered, tears falling down my face. Matthew was also crying - I could hear it.

"I'm sorry Rachel, I didn't know, I swear I didn't know that they were going to kill you," He said, "They just told me to bring a woman with light hair like me, and they would let my brothers go."

"It's alright, Matthew," I said, emotionlessly.

"The woman goes first!" The man holding me roared. They laid me down on the pedestal, tying my arms and legs down. They began singing a haunting, beautiful song, lulling my eyes closed.

"I'm so sorry, Rachel," Matthew yelled, "I promise you, I didn't know!" My eyes fluttered open, and I saw a man hovering over me with a knife in hand. Unspeakable pain commenced, I screamed, and withered, praying to get away. And then just praying that it would end, that I would die. I forgive you Matthew. I for-
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reviews of this writing

1220921
chapter 1 review
☼☼Khloe☼☼~*~GeT bOrN aGaiN~*~ said:
" Loved it alot!!! I wish it was longer! "
1203021
chapter 1 review
T.O.L.I. said:
" wow. wow. wowowowowowowowow. ok sorry cant say anything more about that until the competition "
1405856
chapter 1 review
Leiko said:
" I can't say much 'till competition, but i read it. "
886144
chapter 1 review
♥ Brigid ♥ liked it
1278319
chapter 1 review
*Lunabell* said:
" Oh. My. Gods.

This was really amazing, and sad. "
1306540
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Silver said:
" you're a good writer :) "
1223673
chapter 1 review
Kataury said:
" A good piece but not your best work that I've read. Good job though. somewhat gory for you to write though don't you think? I've never known you to wr…more "
1226187
chapter 1 review
Rachel said:
" I liked it, but i think it was way tense. Maybe to much for me... Anyway, i loved it. It had a good plot! "
1405047
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Shelleyhw liked it
1657776
chapter 1 review
Emma said:
" O i loved it "
1726712
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Cody liked it
1117336
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kittykat said:
" Oh my gosh! that is so sad!! "
1223775
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Jessica liked it
2005471
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kofie_hime said:
" i really like it!! more! ^^ "
1202936
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SylverSkye said:
" great,but sad. "
2151309
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Madelyn said:
" A little to fast, but good

"
2167891
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Harli said:
" OOO I liked that. It was interesting, kept my attention the whole time. Also great ending. Is there gonna be more or what? In the group you posted…more "
2093554
chapter 1 review
D.C. said:
" Alright Mallie! Good story, you really had me on the edge of my seat. I hate sad endings, but its better when your not hugly involved with the charact…more "
1935279
chapter 1 review
Lorna said:
" Wow! more!! is there more?? loved it. i hate matthew though...lol "
2436059
chapter 1 review
Brendan said:
" eh, a little empty for me. Something that you might want to work on is widening your vocabulary: like synonyms. i got kinda bored with you usin the sa…more "
2342315
chapter 1 review
Amanda said:
" I really liked this so far. Just maybe work on describing more. Keep writing - I wanna see what happens next. "
2169735
chapter 1 review
Laura liked it
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