"Life changes fast. Life changes in the instant. You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends." Joan Didion from The Year of Magical Thinking

The fleeting nature of the instant and the infinite possibilities there within can overwhelm the mind, and can even inspire an anxiety attack if we embrace the human desire to hold onto that which is, by its very nature, transitory. The fear of loss of something which is never really ours - as it is impossible to truly possess anything - can paralyze personal growth and stunt real relationships from developing. Life and its multitude of instances are, by design, as fugacious as Springtime. These things we understand... that seasons will change and years will pass. If we understand that we cannot hold onto years themselves made up of endless instants, why do we collapse this perspective when it comes to the things and people in our life?

This is not to say that it is insensible to *feel deeply* about loss. To grieve, to mourn and to even fall apart. I am actually an advocate of falling apart, because it helps dissolve the original shape of a thing to allow for a stronger structure to be created, or even for a natural beauty to evolve in its place, like grasses and flowers and trees taking over toppled down buildings.

However, to bring a peace to our minds and a unity between ourselves and natural truths, as well as a strengthening of relationships with things and people in our worlds, we must hold to the fundamental law that all will die, and there is a natural impermanence that all beings and things must adhere to. All the stuff we hold fast to will follow suit as well. My most loved material things: my gigantic puffy king sized bed and my first edition of "A Movable Feast"- these things will either become someone elses, or will eventually fall apart and become bits of fodder in a landfill, which I can only hope they will turn into a beautiful park at some point and not a strip mall, though all that is transitory as well in the larger picture of things.

More importantly, relationships with people are fleeting and will change under the course of time, or *even in the instant*. A person will die. A person will move away. A person will leave your life. A person can do an infinite number of variable things in the instant that will change your relationship, and can even effect your world as you know it to be. This is why it is important to consistently be aware of the elusiveness of all, and that it is beyond our control. It is futile to try and control another human being, or to claim any type of ownership over another because, remember, nothing is ours. It will all be claimed by the laws of nature and the universe. So instead of trying to hold fast to another, allow for their true transitory nature to occur.

I can guarantee this is not a comfortable practice in the beginning, and feels counter instinctual in human nature to do so. But to prevent a world of mental and emotional anguish caused by the illusion of possession, we must see all within the immense reality that is much more amazing by far. Hold, instead, the impression of a thing or person, the experience of reading a beautiful book, or the love of another, or the ephiphanies of a sunset, or the instants of laughter and joy and the essential bits, and even the pain and hopefully share those thoughts and emotions with another being to impress upon their life. Or give it to the universe in thought and energy and action. That is all that is eternal and forever.