As young women, our longing for romance and marriage, for husband and children, is a desire implanted by God Himself at the core of our beings. This hope is part of the foundation of our identity as women; thus the wrestling we face when we are told to be content as singles or to “put our emotions to sleep” can be fruitless and frustrating.

For me, the yearning to go to the High Places returns with new strength at unexpected moments: while sharing the adventures of beloved characters in a well-written book, or watching a friend fall in love with a good man, or being surrounded by the pungent aroma of an autumn campfire. It whispers in a baby’s chuckle and beckons from the warmth of a father’s embrace.

One such experience came recently when I woke up earlier than usual. The tall arched windows in my bedroom overlook acres of forest. The faintest hint of pink tinged the tops of the trees, promising a glorious sunrise. Hugging my knees, I savored the cool breeze drifting through the window and listened to the birds begin to sing. I was perfectly content—yet I felt my heart reaching, yearning. This beauty called to me. It beckoned for me to come…but come where?

The High Places. Was it the desire for a masculine hand to hold mine and share this timeless moment? The answer will aggravate you: it is both yes and no. Everything is sweeter when shared with a best friend for life, your one true love, your man. Without him is loneliness and melancholy. With him life blossoms into a passionate intoxication of delight. From secular love songs to Christian novels, the climax of a woman’s life always comes when she is finally with her man. Sound familiar? Perhaps it does, not only because it is touted in our culture, but because a song in the same key echoes from inside us. Deep inside. Too deep to be blamed on the attempted brain-washing of a depraved culture. There rises a call, a dream from our soul.

What is this thing that draws us? That will not allow us to remain content in the valley our entire life? This tug women feel cannot be captured in mere words, nor confined even within the vast reaches of our own hearts. It is what I refer to as the call to the High Places. Not merely to a man, to romance, or to marriage, which our Christian culture magnifies as the ultimate goal, but to our Father’s High Places.

Do you see? What is often translated as a girlish longing for romance runs far deeper. Our Lord, the mighty and loving King of Kings, calls us to come with Him to a life the world will never understand. He has a much higher purpose for our lives than we could ever imagine.

We seek eternity. The beauty that tugs at our hearts is the echoe of everlasting life that awaits all of God’s people. Our gracious Father gives us glimpses of those riches through dim earthly mirrors. Through marriage is seen a powerful and unique manifestation of what lies beyond. To marvel at and reach for these gifts should not be condemned.

Would you like to join me on this journey to the High Places? The quest demands that we examine our motivations and dreams and allow the Lord to remove any weight that hinders our climb. We follow Him to the High Places by any path He chooses. Our goal is not freedom from the bane of singleness or the subjugation of all our emotions (if only we could still them once in a while!). No, the High Places awaken a desire in us that traces back to our purpose for existence—beyond marriage and even beyond our lives on this earth. The issue of guy-girl relationships is just one of many mountains we face, but for many of us it is the climb through which God chooses to test us most deeply during these “in-between” years.

The longer I wandered in the valley the more comfortable I grew living for less than the best. The High Places held a holy wonder that sparked terror deep inside. In the core of my being echoed a question unbidden, which I was incapable of answering: “Do I really want to go there? Do I really want to be laid bare before a Holy God in all His majesty?”

Above all, a fear clutched at the back of my mind holding me paralyzed. “What if God does not give me what I really want?” It sounds foolish when spelled out in black and white, but that did not invalidate its grip on me.

We dread giving our cherished dreams to the Lord, because…what if He takes it away? How can we bear to relinquish something so close to our heart? To do so would inflict a gaping wound, and pain is to be avoided at all costs—right?

Dare we trust our Father to faithfully provide for us? Are we willing to yield our dreams for marriage and intimacy and permit Him to do as He pleases? Are we sworn to seeking the High Places even if it becomes clear that our journey will not include the firm grip of a prince’s hand to help us over the tough spots? Is our passion for God’s glory strong enough to withstand the pounding of emotions?

Our Shepherd knows our fragility. We do not love Him even the smallest percent of what we should, nor do we give Him half of the devotion He deserves. Yet no matter our place on the climb, He offers His hand. “You love me only this much?” He asks. “Well, then I will give you the strength to love Me just a little bit more today, and a little bit more the day after that, until you are so full of love for Me that there is no room for anything else.”