Mariel's Reviews > Persuasion

Persuasion by Jane Austen
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Jan 03, 11

Recommended to Mariel by: they twisted my arm
Recommended for: Do I have any peers to pressure?



This photo of Jimmy Buffett enjoying a buffett of women is not here for vote pandering. It's here for a good reason.

Persuasion is about pressure from family and society. I told myself (read Persuasion in my teens and again when I was twenty-two) that I'd have told them all to fuck off. (I would've given up on Captain Wentworth when it appeared that he wanted another.) I get it now.

I was shocked and shamed to discover that I'm somewhat distantly related to butt-rocker Jimmy Buffett (and born in the same town too *sob*). I've resisted wearing hawaiian shirts and margaritas (Margaritaville must be the WORST job in the world. I bet it's the lowest caste possible in India). I've resisted making music out of my butt (Jim Carrey can sleep tonight).

I have so! "What's that your singing as you mentally toil over another Jane Austen review?" Tori of the lavatory, flushed all the way to Timbuktu. Supposing what's that suppository to you. But is the butt is the but of what butt. The butt crack is the crack of the butt is the butt of the crack. Won't you share with me, it's all gonna be hunky dory. Tori don't wanna be no whorey. Jimmy Buffett gets more ass than a toilet seat. I'm afraid he's venarial diseased. Er, it's the new Jack Johnson song. I'm not making the Butt of Rock music, or anything. (I'm not hiding my doodle of a toilet with a bow on its top.)

True story: Jimmy Buffett threatened to sue my favorite uncle when he posted a campaign online that the fight for manatees was a ruse to take away boater's rights. I'm TRYING to fight the family pressure to kill manatees. It's hard.


Hagar the Horrible gets drunk on Sammy Hagar's special blend of Cabo Wabo every night and pillages villages for groupies... It is tough to resist pressure, tough to go it on your own when you let yourself be tied down to what your family wants, and inherited personality. I really liked that Austen's book is relateable even if you would just tell everybody to fuck off. Not everything that is easy for me is easy for other people, and vice versa. I think it is good to be reminded of that. Real growing pains stuff. (Um, not making a good enough case for that Buffett photo yet, Mariel...)


ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME! A little loooong time. Tell him five dollar! Give him a great big flush! (Butt punk rock. It could be adapted to a '60s girl group. Mariel and the Whirl Pools.)
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Comments (showing 1-14 of 14) (14 new)

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Mariel My twin and I would bring our twins and hang on Buffett's arm too, but that would be twincest and incest, and not the cool French lemony scented kind of incest.


message 2: by Kemper (new)

Kemper Jane Austen, Jimmy Buffett, Hagar the Horrible and Private Pyle walked into a bar....


Mariel Oooh I know how this one ends. The bartender gives 'em each other's haircuts. Jane wears Hagar's hat as a bra.


message 4: by Kemper (new)

Kemper Mariel wrote: "Oooh I know how this one ends. The bartender gives 'em each other's haircuts. Jane wears Hagar's hat as a bra."

Then Private Pyle steps on a pop-top, and blows out his brains on the bar top....


Mariel Luckily Buffett has plenty of parrotheads to spare and Pyle becomes his mimicky flaky.


message 6: by Oriana (new)

Oriana I don't understand a damn thing happening in this review, but I fucking love it.


Mariel Yes!


Mariel I also share a bday with Diamond Dave so it isn't my fault if I slaughter the Beach Boys.


message 9: by Oriana (new)

Oriana haha, what? I don't know what that means either!


Mariel Maybe I should change my gender to male and then I'll get trolls for the Jane Austen reviews.


message 11: by Esteban (last edited Mar 05, 2011 09:11AM) (new)

Esteban del Mal Ha!

Hagar pillages villages...

I'm a distant relation of Jo Stafford. She's dead, but she sang with Glenn Miller when she was alive. For awhile, anyway.


Mariel That's better than Buffett!


message 13: by Stephanie (new)

Stephanie I worked in the Key West of Seaworld Orlando, I had to listen to Buffett and The Beach Boys all damn day long, every day, day after day.

Please, slaughter away!


message 14: by Kemper (new)

Kemper I can't believe you didn't get a single comment from an angry Parrot Head.


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