Mary's Reviews > Fascinating Womanhood

Fascinating Womanhood by Helen B. Andelin
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's review
Mar 13, 2010

really liked it
Read from March 13 to 21, 2010

I started out to write a pretty lengthy review of this book, because I have a lot of thoughts on it. But it all boils down to one simple point, in my opinion, which is that there is a lot of good in this book. There are also some things that just seem weird, or silly, or maybe just plain wrong. I won't say which parts I think are which, because really it's all just personal opinion and viewpoint.

But I do think this book has a lot more merit than most people give it credit for, and my advice for anyone thinking of reading it is to definitely do, but take it all with a grain of salt. Don't automatically accept everything it says, but don't automatically cast it all aside as ridiculous either. (Which, I promise you, you will be tempted to do at first). I think most of the people who have given this book scathing reviews haven't actually read it, because I know that my opinion of it changed as I kept reading.

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Comments (showing 1-9 of 9) (9 new)

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Alice Dawson One of my favorite books. It is my marriage bible. Enjoy!

Mary So far I'm having a love/hate relationship with it. Some parts and tips are so good. Other times I want to heave the book out the window. :)

Alice Dawson I think I know what you mean. It is written from a different time period. Thinking, we are not used to, but it works! I love it. I need to use it more. Don't give up on it. It is worth it!

message 4: by Dana (new) - rated it 1 star

Dana Cheryl There are so many better books on marriage out there. The "formula" found in the book stifles real communication and intimacy by replacing it with manipulation. We must be wary of any earthly advice that includes a disclaimer to hide it from our husbands. The very best way to build a marriage is to build Christ-like character. This book is based more upon literary classics than scripture and the "ideal" it creates is far from the Proverbs 31 woman which is Heavenly Father's ideal woman. Manipulation often works but it comes with a price and at its core it is a sinful practice.

message 5: by Tina (new)

Tina Thank you Dana Cheryl. This book should not be read. But of course if a woman is looking for an excuse not to have to work and wants to stay home and eat bonbons all day, then by all means read the book.

Mary Not trying to start a "Mommy Wars" discussion, but I am a stay at home mom. I do not eat bonbons all day, and I do, in fact, work. I always hope women can support each other in our individual roles and choices.

message 7: by Dana (last edited Apr 11, 2014 05:33PM) (new) - rated it 1 star

Dana Cheryl Mary, I really don't believe that Tina meant you any insult. Rather, I think it's just one of those infamous online misunderstandings. As I read it she was commenting about the author's ridiculous assertions that women curl their hair daily, always wear makeup, and never wear denim. In order for a woman to "fix herself up" as the author insists she really couldn't be very busy around the house. The author is really calling women to return to the more formal standard of living in days past. I'm from the South and we're much more formal than most people and it truly does take a lot of time away from more important things like snuggling with little ones, making a mess with finger paints, and generally living an open, honest, joyous, Christ-centered life.

Mary Dana, I really appreciate your peace-making comment, truly. I didn't think she was insulting me personally, but I did feel like she was critiquing women not working outside the home, and that hits a sore spot with me. I hope she (and you) also don't misunderstand my comment, because I don't want to come across as against working mothers either. We all do what we feel is best or necessary for our families. All I want is for us to not tear each other down or make false assumptions. As far as the book goes, I honestly read it so long ago that I can't really comment on it anymore because my memory of it is dim. I do believe that women should do at least a little towards making ourselves presentable, for our husbands, yes (and I can't for the life of me see how making an effort for my husband is a bad thing), but also just for ourselves. I'm not saying I spend hours in front of the mirror every day, but I also don't go around in yoga pants and no makeup every day either. I think there's a balance, and every woman should find where she is comfortable and happy. And I'm definitely all for making messes with finger paints and doing my best to live a Christ-centered life. :)

message 9: by Tina (new)

Tina Oh Dana please accept my apology. All my friends who are at-home Moms are working Moms 24/7. Unlike women with jobs, a stay-at-home mom never gets to "leave work". My strong complaint with the book is that it supports the idea of making your husband think you can't do anything for yourself, shouldn't understand the finances, and that a woman should pretend to be helpless with minor tools and repairs around the house. Women crossed our continent in covered wagons with babies on their backs. We can love and honor our men and be feminine women AND be strong and wise. I believe our men depend on it. And in these economic times it is not wise for a woman to be ignorant of the finances of her family as the book advises. Just because we know how the budget is made and where the money goes doesn't make us the boss it makes us a a team with our husbands.

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