Laura's Reviews > The Mistress's Daughter

The Mistress's Daughter by A.M. Homes
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's review
Nov 08, 09

bookshelves: adoption, read-2009, nonfiction, biography-memoir
Read in November, 2009

I'm finding it somewhat difficult to articulate exactly how I feel about this book. It took me a long time to read it, which is usually a sign that it is not that great, but there were a lot of good things about it.

I believe A.M. Homes gives an absolutely true & authentic account of her adoption experience, in a much less whiny way than other accounts I have read, and for that I am grateful. Nevertheless, there is a whiny element to it. Likely because I am not adopted, it is not possible for me to understand the conflicting feelings adopted children have...particularly when the adoptions are closed and there is no contact with and little or no knowledge of the biological parents. But it seems to me that having those conflicting feelings should not translate into a lack of appreciation of one's adoption narrative & family history, especially if it has been good, as Homes' was. Perhaps I am naive in this area...I will willingly admit that, but it's very hard to understand how anyone could not see how obviously an adoptee's life is an interweaving of both the biological & adoptive stories, however fully or spotty they might be. I am gratified that in the end, Homes recognizes that. It just seemed terribly sad to me that it took her over 40 years to get there. In that respect one can really appreciate the changes that have occurred with regard to adoption over the last 30 years, which allow for a much more transparent relationship with all parties, and ultimately a more positive & fulfilling experience.
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Reading Progress

10/06/2009 page 65
27.08%
10/17/2009 "150"
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