Patrick's review
Special Topics in Calamity Physics
by Marisha Pessl
You and I gave this book the same number of stars. Which means we are both the same number of trying-to-be-nice-about-stuff-that-probably-doesn't-deserve-it.
Is it because we are both sort of from Texas?
Based on this, I feel comfortable in saying to you: do not try Açaí juice. Down that path lies what the Germans in Texas call "Herzzerstörung".
I think the publisher misunderstood Franzen's quote. A masterpiece "of sorts"? Faint praise. The perfect amount of praise, but faint nonetheless.
I read this because of Jessica's comment.
a) Brilliant
b) Belongs here: http://www.mcsweeneys.net/link...
Your review was by far more witty and entertaining than the book. Have you penned anything else for us to read?
I actually like acai juice.
Couldn't stand this book!!! Why oh why did I spend 5 hours of my life reading this pretentious drivel???
Great comment, BTW.
I agree wholeheartedly with everyone else -- I think this is the best review I've seen on goodreads, hands-down. Or many other places, for that matter.
I bet the review is better than the book.
I bet the juice is better than the book, for that matter.
I bet the juice is cheaper than the book.
Be my reading muse, O Patrick...
Best. Review. Ever.
I keep almost putting this book on my to-read list, but that Cadillac smile quote may have cured this urge for good.
Patrick's review
Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessl
Patrick's review
rating:
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
recommended for: easily impressed high school students
Reviews of “Special Topics in Calamity Physics” and the Bottle of Açaí Juice I Bought for Lunch Cleverly Masked as SAT Test Questions
Choices:
(a) Special Topics in Calamity Physics
(b) The bottle of açaí juice I bought for lunch
(c) Both a and b
(d) Neither a nor b
Questions
(1) __ I had heard good things about it
(2) __ I bought it on a whim
(3) __ If feeling extremely charitable, I might call it “frothy”
(4) __ It seemed sort of good in the beginning, but by the end I was like, “Blaahahhgajh. End, end, end.”
(5) __ Contains metaphors that go down like a junebug having lion sex in a bourbon mood
(6) __ Blue things totally dissed
(7) __ Nabokov rolling in his grave
(8) __ Authoritative blurb raises questions about agenda of blurber
(9) __ Handy pronunciation key for difficult-to-pronounce words like “açaí” or “pessl”
(10) __ “I’m confused about what editors, like, do?”
(11) __ “Maybe I don’t need this many a...more
Choices:
(a) Special Topics in Calamity Physics
(b) The bottle of açaí juice I bought for lunch
(c) Both a and b
(d) Neither a nor b
Questions
(1) __ I had heard good things about it
(2) __ I bought it on a whim
(3) __ If feeling extremely charitable, I might call it “frothy”
(4) __ It seemed sort of good in the beginning, but by the end I was like, “Blaahahhgajh. End, end, end.”
(5) __ Contains metaphors that go down like a junebug having lion sex in a bourbon mood
(6) __ Blue things totally dissed
(7) __ Nabokov rolling in his grave
(8) __ Authoritative blurb raises questions about agenda of blurber
(9) __ Handy pronunciation key for difficult-to-pronounce words like “açaí” or “pessl”
(10) __ “I’m confused about what editors, like, do?”
(11) __ “Maybe I don’t need this many a...more
You and I gave this book the same number of stars. Which means we are both the same number of trying-to-be-nice-about-stuff-that-probably-doesn't-deserve-it.
Is it because we are both sort of from Texas?
Based on this, I feel comfortable in saying to you: do not try Açaí juice. Down that path lies what the Germans in Texas call "Herzzerstörung".
I think the publisher misunderstood Franzen's quote. A masterpiece "of sorts"? Faint praise. The perfect amount of praise, but faint nonetheless.
I read this because of Jessica's comment.
a) Brilliant
b) Belongs here: http://www.mcsweeneys.net/link...
Your review was by far more witty and entertaining than the book. Have you penned anything else for us to read?
I actually like acai juice.
Couldn't stand this book!!! Why oh why did I spend 5 hours of my life reading this pretentious drivel???
Great comment, BTW.
I agree wholeheartedly with everyone else -- I think this is the best review I've seen on goodreads, hands-down. Or many other places, for that matter.
I bet the review is better than the book.
I bet the juice is better than the book, for that matter.
I bet the juice is cheaper than the book.
Be my reading muse, O Patrick...
Best. Review. Ever.I keep almost putting this book on my to-read list, but that Cadillac smile quote may have cured this urge for good.



