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The Ask by Sam Lipsyte
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Jun 12, 12

Read on June 11, 2012

I'll let this book speak for itself (pp. 228-9):

I came to with Vargina leaning over me, her breasts brushing up against my chest.

"I'm sorry I undress you with my eyes," I said.

"It's okay, Milo. Just breathe."

"I do a lot worse with my eyes. Am I the only one?"

"Of course not, Milo. You just lack subtlety. But breathe now."

"Subtlety," I said.

"Breathe."

"I never wanted to hurt anyone. I just wanted to slide my dick between your breasts."

"A Sabrett man," said Vargina.

"What?"

"Breathe. You're okay, but we've called for help."

"I'm so sorry," I said.

"I'm not offended, Milo."

"Does that mean you are interested?"

"Not at all. Now keep breathing, baby."

"Because I'm married?"

"Sure, because you're married."

"Because I'm white?"

Vargina laughed.

"I'm not very likable, am I?"

"You're likable enough," said Vargina.

"No, I mean, if I were the protagonist of a book or movie, it would be hard to like me, to identify with me, right?"

"I would never read a book like that, Milo. I can't think of anyone who would. There's no reason for it."
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