Tracie's Reviews > Fifty Shades of Grey

Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James
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's review
Jun 07, 2012

bookshelves: ebook, this-book-blows-goats-i-have-proof
Read from June 04 to 07, 2012

Let's do this.

I'm borrowing this from the NYPL for Kindle so no one has to see me reading it, and I'm going to status update frequently, so climb aboard.

"Climb aboard" was probably the worst thing I could have said.

ETA: The woman who wrote this book has never had sex. The end.

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Reading Progress

06/04/2012 page 15
3.0% "15 pages in; no sex yet"
06/04/2012 page 35
7.0% "35 pages in; still no sex. Come on."
06/04/2012 page 42
8.0% "This is possibly the worst thing I've ever read. It's maybe worse than Twilight, except at least it's not written with teenage girls as its target audience. I know this started out as fanfiction, but I have read A LOT of fanfiction that's better than this. No sex yet, but she has used the word "Adonis""
06/04/2012 page 56
11.0% "Ladies and gentlemen, we have our first erection. But still no intercourse. Just a tease in an elevator."
06/05/2012 page 85
17.0% "Unlocked: Penetration Level One, Vanilla Sex"
06/05/2012 page 101
20.0% "I've been reading the sex scenes out loud to Chris and we've never laughed harder. She still hasn't signed her bondage paperwork though so no weird stuff." 2 comments
06/05/2012 page 101
20.0% "My favoritest part of this crapfest might be that every time the Latino character appears he exclaims, "Dios mio!""
06/05/2012 page 130
25.0% "I know I shouldn't stereotype, but I have a hard time believing a dude this into hardcore bondage drinks only white wine."
06/05/2012 page 139
27.0% "Contender for favorite line so far: "'I don't remember reading about nipple clamps in the Bible.'""
06/06/2012 page 200
39.0% "These are some pretty detailed descriptions of what's going on from someone who's supposed to be blindfolded."
06/07/2012 page 306
60.0% "No she didn't just use the term "UST"" 2 comments
84.0% "The Scarlet Letter has the burst of sunshine; 50 Shades of Grey has the scene with the tampon."
95.0% "Aw, he's braiding her hair."

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