Esteban del Mal's Reviews > Fucked by the Lake Monster

Fucked by the Lake Monster by Brandi Burlington
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May 29, 2012

it was amazing
bookshelves: essay-novella-shorts, fiction, call-me-a-whore, humor, ebook
Read on May 29, 2012 — I own a copy , read count: 1

Before I read this story, I was the type of guy that'd try to parse out the underlying psychosexual implications of the opening sequence to JAWS. Now, I'm afraid, that sequence will just arouse me.

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water? Nah. I've had it wrong all these years: It's just a Romanesque pleasure pool. That bump against your ankle? Don't worry about it. Somebody's just happy to see you.

Unlike the author of Snowballin': I Fucked Frosty, whose artful use of dialogue paints a veritable tapestry of first-person/character erotica, the author of Fucked by the Lake Monster relies more upon description of setting, and a giant, prehistoric penis, to bring the reader to climax.

The pressure of her feet squeezing down on his junk was too much for the monster. He let out a noise that was a mixture of pain, pleasure and sounds not heard by ears since sometime before the Dinosaurs went extinct. His balls twitched.

Who wouldn't feel for the lake monster after reading this? PETA, take notes. You'll never win the vegan debate with rational, staid argumentation. No, we won't stop eating animals until we learn that they're the best lay we've ever had.
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Comments (showing 1-3 of 3) (3 new)

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message 1: by Eh?Eh! (new)

Eh?Eh! Did you read the snow one, too??


message 2: by Eh?Eh! (new)

Eh?Eh! Oh yeah: Whore!


message 3: by Esteban (last edited May 30, 2012 09:06AM) (new) - rated it 5 stars

Esteban del Mal Was it the Elizabethans that maintained that every orgasm was a little death? If that's true, it's EXACTLY like King Dong Kong.


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