Antonin Scalia is a tragic figure. He can tear down any mode of legal theorizing that displeases him. But Scalia can't seem to build up a method of interpreting laws that even he can consistently follow. Attention to legislative history? Scalia blows that out of the water, makes it look positively Looney Toons. So, how do we understand constitutional or statutory phrases? Just look at the text, he says. But, in practice, Scalia inserts his value judgments into textual ambiguities all the time. Scalia as a legal theorist, ingenious but sterile, can only destroy legal theory.