JadedlilFecker's Reviews > Fifty Shades of Grey

Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James
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Apr 24, 2012

did not like it
bookshelves: incase-theres-no-toiletpaper, looking-to-steal-ebook, no-feckin-way, dnf, boom-boom-kitty-feck, crazypants, id-rather-gouge-out-mine-eyes, mommy-the-zombies, never-babysitting-again, need-purgatory-after-reading, mock-the-heroine, plagiarism, serialkiller-romance, the-crazies, tstl, when-im-feeling-charitable, double-crap-triple-crap, yay-people-are-reading-again, 50-shades-of-pale, 50-shades-academy, a-fuck-was-not-given-today, all-we-get-is-titillation, bitch-x, blurb-told-me-all-i-need-to-know, camp-candy, caurterize-my-vagina-plz, contemporary-bondage-thing, day-of-rage, erotica, f-u-50-shades, feck-all-these-five-stars, for-those-new-to-reading, going-too-dark, graphic-stupidity-or-absurdity, gtfo, hero-jellies, hero-psychotic-fuck, heroine-abused, heroine-chronic-cryer, i-may-hate-myself-tomorrow, insult-to-bsdm, is-this-comedy, lol-interviews-with-editors-lol, lol-they-rant-about-historicals, lolzy, myfantasies-better-than-yo-writing, not-a-safe-guy, raped-by-hero, read-it-they-said, save-for-making-fires-in-wwiii, sexual-violence-as-love, sick-of-internet-spam-as-writing, skarkity-snark, someone-swore-by-it, someones-review-made-me-lolz, somewhat-not-erotic, spankings-owwies, sweet-as-christian-grey, upper-arm-grab, violent-couples, where-is-code-pink, where-is-liam-neeson, where-is-morgan-freeman, where-is-my-spam-filter, will-dull-my-knife-if-i-impale-it, wont-this-shit-just-die, worse-than-b-movie, wtf, wtf-this-isnt-bondage, you-get-off-on-this

I see updates on my friend's list constantly in reference to this book and its reviews. I'm just posting this here, incase someone has previously found it on e-copy, and wants to graciously provide me with the link. I will love you long-time. ;*)

I'm not looking to buy this book, but I'll damn sure find an e-copy online somewhere and pilfer it, as it has also, apparently, been stolen. (I'll post a link and keep updating it, for others to share the e-book, in the future.)

From the short preview I read on Amazon.com--this Christian fellow, puts me in mind of the Duque in Teresa Denys's Flesh and the Devil(BR group know what I'm screamin' there), with facial reconstruction for his Habsburg jaw and other malformations. It goes without saying, girls--no matter how sex0rz a boy is, he shouldn't be allowed to make your vay-ja-ja into a clown car.

I see the ratings are divided down the middle on this one, but by ALL accounts and descriptions of the book; it doesn't appear as though it has a saving grace. Even the defenders do not object to the elaborate extent of the abusive nature the heroine endures; they merely accept it. It seems to boils down to an abundance of unhinged rape victim blaming and glorification of cancerous or toxic relationships as a form of normalcy, and raises credible suspicion that the BSDM tilt was its first intention, but the psychosis and addled-minded urge which served as a mouthpiece for the author's writing, degraded the BSDM of any salvageable integrity.

EDITED JULY 21st 2012:

...Yeah. Sorry, bub - this corner has a rolling tumbleweed. ;]
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Comments (showing 51-66 of 66) (66 new)

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Misfit Jeannette wrote: "Neither "nosing in" nor going off-topic is expressly forbidden. It happens all the time, and is typically quite enjoyable, at least I think so. :)"

Mimi wrote: "The Tulip Festival was last month, and in Skagit County.
The Lavender Festival is, I think, in July and in Sequim.
I've been to neither, and I'm sorry for nosing into this clearly off topic thread :)"

I know. Hopefully Mermarie doesn't chastise us for going OT.

JadedlilFecker LOL Misfit, it's not a good thread, unless it totally stems out into five or ten subjects. Hijack away!

message 53: by Mimi (new)

Mimi Ha!!!! How true that is, and thank you :)

message 54: by [deleted user] (new)

I've met many of my favorite GR people via thread hijackings! :)

message 55: by Lori (new) - rated it 2 stars

Lori Wow we really have gotten off topic!!!!

message 56: by JadedlilFecker (last edited Jun 02, 2012 11:03AM) (new) - rated it 1 star

JadedlilFecker I think I've put my finger on it.

I know I've mentioned that I thought her writing put me in mind of roleplayers, but I hadn't fully thought about it.

I used to roleplay on IRC back in the day; text-based. You have an open 'comment' box, where you make actions, with your character's adventure and explore the pre-described world in a literary fashion. It was mainly narrative, etc--but where my written character was a fierce sort of sword-wielder, it was difficult to find a permanent RPG to play in, because frankly--I'd learn the rules of the game and eventually kill off the majority of the game's population. XD What can I say? I like a take-no-prisoner sort of female lead!

Anyhow, in my quest for another RPG, one time--I stumbled on an RPG, made my introduction into the textchat, etc..etc...only to be bombarded by a MILLION PMs, asking me why my character had a sword, and so forth. I was giving a run-down of the rules, explained a woman's ROLE in the RPG. I hadn't realized it was a sex RPG called Gor. Frankly, I wasn't appalled by a sexual RPG, because honestly, they were so common back then, but the guidelines freaked me the feck out. All women were slaves, mainly--and if you weren't, you had to wear a veil. No weaponry were given to these 'mistresses'. Then, I tried to stress that I wasn't a dominant female, either. Meanwhile, their roleplay style was all from the first person perspective and they constantly directed their narrative as this girl. One of the more friendly males gave me a sample of their writing style and content. It was basically of a woman who got kidnapped and turned into a sex-slave. I was mortified beyond all comprehension, also take into consideration I was sixteen, reading this sort of underground scourge of the earth. But what stood out particularly, again-- was that this writing bit he gave me, was also from a Gor author, or modern version, because the RPG Gor itself, is based in Medieval settings or some sort of Medieval world. I wanted to throw the 1st person narrative into the man's face..fore in the text itself, the woman described how she came to enjoy this sort of treatment. My sixteen year old brain couldn't fathom it, and even I secretly tried to persuade the females in PM(no others could read what I said to them), to allowing me to roleplay out a rescue of freeing the slaves. HAHAH!!! A normal sixteen year old heart, doesn't rationalize the willing participation of those slaves. Their free will to choose what sort of lifestyle they wished, etc. You know, it's funny--because one of the most exclusive parts of that situation, that struck out to me, was the fact that I kept ridiculing the entire game, the players, the inhumane concept of slavery, etc--and that dominant male in PM said to me, "Good, you haven't lost your mind then."

Needless to say, I was banned and removed from that chat channel. ;D

message 57: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla I have a few of the Gor books. They have quite the dirty little rep and I wonder how far I'll be able to get into them before bailing. :P

As someone who's also gotten banned from a site or two for not following some bizarre, arbitrary code of rules, I LOL'D. :D So the chicks in the RPG had fully embraced their Stockholm Syndrome, aye?

message 58: by JadedlilFecker (last edited Jun 15, 2012 12:10PM) (new) - rated it 1 star

JadedlilFecker LOL, after they declined my roleplay aid, I wanted my character to kill them too. I wanted to have her hide a sword underneath her veil, one of those psycho's get near, and split him in half. LOL

I've been banned from so many sites, so many channels--I lost count. Even my old RPGs, because my characters were prone to bloodlust in Medieval RPGs against aggressive men, and when you learn the rules so keenly--and excel as one of the greatest in combat, etc--(Not to mention scaring the heck out of every female in the game), people don't like having you around anymore. :(

In that Gor game, one chick crawled to some Dom with food in hand, I damn near lost my mind.

My fledgling bitch mode kicked in, and the guy who had semi-defended me/I recruited to my side(Over a period of two days), I believe he was also removed. I thought it was rather classic, two dom's fighting over a free, woman who hadn't even been collared yet. All the old heroine I grew up on, were definitely doing cartwheels and cheering me on! :D Even when I made a mock-attempt to play along with their world, veiled and without speaking(mistresses aren't permitted to speak, unless spoken to), I elaborately described my character's thoughts, reflection and disgust of their entire soiree. I ensured she held herself high, proud and unmoving in her self-respect and dignity!

I hope it seeded a resentment in those slaves, after I was eventually banned! Well, I caused enough ruckus; aired out the slaves humiliation, instilled respect in a Dom, instigated that against a Dom who wanted to collar my character(oh no! the slaves do not rejoice at Dom's longing for free women, their whole groveling existence is nil!), my work was done there.

You know, that wtf-is-her-name in 50 Shades made some sort of Pride and Prejudice quotes, as her conscience was conveniently hogtied and weighed down by her inner-goddess, and I thought--Elizabeth Bennett is rolling in her grave right now.

message 59: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla *dies from LOLZ*

Well done, chica. :D

JadedlilFecker *Rockin' in the free world Metal fingers* XD LOL

Awww, shucks... I guess it isn't very feminine for girls to go around kickin' boys asses! Well, I was called bulldyke, lesbian, man-hater and every other slur imaginable when my kill count(mostly men and exceeded theirs), and I said--I don't hate men. I hate pathetic males.

Anyway, I'd lay down money to say that author was once a roleplayer. She roleplays, she doesn't write. It's not Literature; it's roleplay recollection. A record account of either RL roleplay she's done, or text-based.

message 61: by JadedlilFecker (last edited Jun 15, 2012 08:56AM) (new) - rated it 1 star

JadedlilFecker Guess I should give it a rating...

For the 100 pages I migrated through. ..and a 1-star kidney shot for all of the brilliant authors out there who can't get published, not to mention MIA from the bestseller list.

Misfit Looooooooooooooool!

Purist Love the shelves!!

JadedlilFecker Lol, thanks, Purist. When I'm ever bored(like at work), I sometimes conjure up new ones that may adequately apply. :D

Purist :)
Well, all the shelf titles definitely apply!!
Btw, has anyone read this: A Coupla Shades of Taupe: A Parody by Court Burback. The description is interesting.

Rabbit {Paint me like one of your 19th century gothic heroines!} Mermarie, you are a badass, and I love what you did with the GOR rpg. Gor guys are pretty creepy, even in the kinkster scene.

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