Kat Kennedy's Reviews > The Forever Girl

The Forever Girl by Rebecca  Hamilton
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Jul 05, 12

bookshelves: we-ll-see-time-will-tell

Reason in comments.
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Comments (showing 1-50 of 459) (459 new)


message 1: by Kat Kennedy (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy What happened

Author's response:

A few people have taken selective screen shots of things I’ve said, be they taken out of context, and prepared a compilation reminiscent of reality TV. I’m not talking about the scripted kind; I’m talking about the clever editing approach that is a part of just about any reality TV show.

Yes. Yes, that's exactly what I did. *Cue eyeroll*

Better catering at the pity party next time, please.


message 2: by Brie (new)

Brie Do the authors not realize how their behavior affects them negatively when they say things like this or attack reviews that are not 4 or 5 star? I just do not understand why they would get so "hurt feelings" if people don't like the book. It doesn't mean everyone hates it or them, just that everyone has different tastes. *sigh*


message 3: by Kat Kennedy (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy Do you ever just go back and read what you write before you post it, Rebecca?

Where do you get this ability to turn things around and make yourself the victim in absolutely every situation?

I do not set out to hurt people and I honestly could not care less about you as a person. I don't hate you, I don't even dislike you. But I am, and always will support reviewers. Despite your assertions that you are respectful to reviewers, I have seen you be less than that three times at the least.

And let's be clear here. I am not stalking you. I was tipped off no less than three times by three different people to your activities. Which I checked out and documented because that's what I do. This is how I protect reviewers and ensure that they're not bullied or left defenseless against authors. And I have done this for strangers and, at one time, an author I respect and personally get along with very well. I'm not following your posts and tweets and blogs - people send them to me and I follow up on the information.

And your accusation that I am taking you out of context is ridiculous. As per your advice, if you checked, I had already linked to absolutely everything so that people could read for themselves - I always, always do because this is not my first time on the merry go round. The screenshots are merely there because I already keep them (otherwise posts disappear and I get called a liar) and to display.

I do not have a personal vendetta against you. I take issue with your professionalism and your actions. I haven't even actively decided NOT to read your book. But you do not seem to understand what professionalism is or how to be it.

This is a problem for those who write negative reviews - which get tweeted by you and then attacked by your fans.
This is a problem for the reviews you comment on and "correct".
This is a problem for any author who wants to sign to your new publishing company - how are you supposed to guide them and their actions when you can't guide your own? Are you going to advise your authors treat reviewers as you have?

Basically, unless you're releasing a book, starting an argument, or causing trouble - I have no interest in what you're doing. But maligning me for bringing attention to your actions doesn't help your cause.

This might help you on your quest for professionalism though - you can not claim to take full responsibility for your actions and then spend 16 lines monologuing on how it's not fair, everyone's against you, and they're all liars/purposely twisting facts about you. That is NOT professionalism and certainly not taking full responsibility.

Seriously. Look at that massive post! If I was five inches more juvenile and assholish I would have just typed tl;dr and gotten on with the rest of my life.


message 4: by rameau (new)

rameau Kat wrote: "Seriously. Look at that massive post! If I was five inches more juvenile and assholish I would have just typed tl;dr and gotten on with the rest of my life. "

I am. Bye ladies.


message 5: by Helen (last edited Apr 03, 2012 04:33AM) (new) - added it

Helen Rebecca wrote: "I respect everyone here's right to an opinion. It seems a lot of people are seeing this differently. I usually just ask people read things for themselves, instead of basing on snippets, and decide ..."

I am actually familiar with a couple of persons with Asperger syndrome. So I understand that you might percieve things different from "normal" people. I also understand that you might react extremely even when the situation does not warrant it. But I'm not sure that you do.

You claim that your disability makes you react like you did, even though you realise it's wrong after. Why, then, do you read negative reviews, if you know they will affect you badly?

If you must contact with your fanbase, get yourself a good friend or manager to screen the comments and tell you basics. Then write your reply and get that person to edit it and post it. Don't enter the discussions directly.

And I'm sorry, but the moment you decided to publish your book, it's not just "your book" anymore. You gave it to the public, for praise or scorn. And both will come - I don't think there is a book someone didn't find fault with. The reader has the right to interpret it in whatever way he or she wants. If you want to continue publishing, you have to learn to live with it. Tough luck.


message 6: by Alicia (new) - added it

Alicia Rebecca,

Please forgive the intrusion, but I feel like I need to save you. I follow you on Twitter and generally enjoy finding out what you're up to. You're both entertaining and interesting.

I know it's sad, and I'm sure it's something I'll struggle with when my first book gets published, but the truth of the matter is: You don't get to explain your books. You just don't. You had hundreds of pages in which to make your case, and if folks don't get it, it's because the hundreds of pages didn't do it for them.

Another truth is: When you step in and debate aspects of your book, even if your goal is just to start a lively conversation, it makes you look bad. You don't get to disagree with reviewers. You aren't going to change their minds, and anyway, their reviews are based on how they perceived your book--not on how you perceive your book.

It looks like an intrusion when you step in. And furthermore, in the words of the very wise Stacia Kane: "Authors, reviews are not for you. They are not for you. Authors, reviews are not for you."

Lastly: You are a businesswoman. You have customers. It's probably not a good idea to piss them off, unless you are truly making a stand for something you believe in--other than what's in the pages of your book, which they have read and on which they have formed their own opinions.

Okay, I lied. One more thing. I'd like to direct you to Kenya Wright's Bad Review Recovery Plan. (Just trying to lighten the mood a little.)

Now I'm going to go stick my nosy nose elsewhere.


message 7: by Katie(babs) (new) - added it

Katie(babs) Honestly, reviews mean jack squat. It's word of mouth and talking about books with friends and others that sells books. A review is just a review and will be forgotten. A book is forever and the way an author reacts to a review will be remembered for a long time, and not necessarily the review of a book.


message 8: by ayanami (new)

ayanami Kat wrote: "This is how I protect reviewers and ensure that they're not bullied or left defenseless against authors. And I have done this for strangers and, at one time, an author I respect and personally get along with very well. I'm not following your posts and tweets and blogs - people send them to me and I follow up on the information."

Kat, I have so much respect for you. Thank you for all you do to support reviewers!


message 9: by [deleted user] (new)

Rebecca obviously doesn't mean a word she is saying here because look what she posted here? http://trishawolfe.blogspot.com/2012/...


message 10: by Steph (last edited Apr 03, 2012 12:43PM) (new) - added it

Steph Sinclair Rebecca,

I think you are completely missing the point. This is not a vendetta against you. There is no agenda from "this group." I'm not sure where you got that from, but we have better things to do than make your life miserable.

Reviews are for consumers. Not for the author to come out the woodwork to have a discussion about their book. It is also not very polite to tweet negative reviews! No, I don't care if *they* were reading the book to review it however they saw fit. Unfortunately, that is their right since your book is available to the world. I'm going to be honest and say I read that review and didn't find it personally attacking you. If you felt that it hurt your feelings, you should have just ignored it and moved on! Don't call attention to it on twitter because right now, you look like you are stalking yourself and your reviews.

This is why your book is on my not-gonna-happen shelf. Because I thought about checking you book out and I can't be bothered with holding an author's hand while I write my review. Again it's not a vendetta. It's just me reminding myself to stay in my little corner of the Internet, far away from your book and feelings.

I really wish you best in your writing career, but please know your continued posting here and comments just further cement our reservations.


Lisa (Fic Talk) I actually used to follow you on twitter up until I saw your behaviour on twitter, Rebecca.

Totally uncalled for.

It's lame and pathetic to call a REVIEWER out in a public domain like twitter because you got a "bad review".

That's all I have to say since everyone else above posted what I was thinking.

Especially Kat. I was THINKING this "tl;dr" as I skimmed her "I am the victim" short story.


message 12: by Steph (new) - added it

Steph Sinclair What? O_o

There are so many ways that I could respond to that. Lol. But I'm just going to *facepalm*.


message 13: by Stephanie (new)

Stephanie Wow for definition of passive agressive see Hamilton´s last post


message 14: by Lyndi (new) - added it

Lyndi


Lisa (Fic Talk) Stephanie wrote: "What? O_o

There are so many ways that I could respond to that. Lol. But I'm just going to *facepalm*."



Shizz, there was probably some delay when I was writing up that post since I hadn't seen Rebecca's TWO new posts when I replied. Hmmm...

Btw, if you've got somewhere to be thennnnn why are you still here wasting your time replying? with the same comments that you said before?

BIG OLE'CONFUSED FACE. o_O


message 16: by Kat Kennedy (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy Okay, thank you everybody - but I don't think we're getting anywhere.

Rebecca, just as you complained Absolute Write deleted posts and attacked you without provocation you are now claiming I'm lying/altering facts and bullying you.

But the common denominator in all this is you - and as much as you claim my reporting is unreliable - you are the only one making claims that are not backed up with links, quotes or screencaps.

I don't believe I have ever attacked you personally. I have taken issue with your professionalism and your actions. I would consider a personal attack as mocking your appearance, lifestyle, personality or something in that regard.

And reporting on your actions, which you have publicly admitted to be wrong, is not bullying. I have not harassed you or tried to contact you or set out to belittle you.

If you are going to return to this thread then please return with evidence to back up your claims.


message 17: by [deleted user] (new)

Well......adding this one to the do-not-read list.


message 18: by Brie (last edited Apr 03, 2012 04:43PM) (new)

Brie Placing this author firmly on the "Will never read" list after her last response.


message 19: by Kat Kennedy (last edited Apr 03, 2012 04:44PM) (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy Um...I don't think ANYONE on this thread would suggest that a girl who dresses provocatively deserves to be raped. That analogy would suggest that we have all the power and that you are defenseless. You have 40,000 twitter followers. You are not powerless. I asked you to return with proof that you are being personally attacked. You are not providing that proof.

Please stop insinuating that I am attacking you. Stop going to blogs and claiming I am bullying you. if you can not back it up, then stop saying it.

Because unless I see you attacking reviewers or encouraging your fanbase to, I really have no further interest in you. Our blogpost would have been over with and mostly ignored if you didn't continue to bring it up. I do not exist to antagonize defenseless authors. I do what I do to be the voice of bloggers attacked by authors.


message 20: by Kat Kennedy (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy No, that's it. I think my patience and tolerance is gone.

This is just in the same post and the logical fallacy of it has officially blown my mind.

"I don't think you've posted any personal attacks and sorry if anything I said sounded that way."

"Because as a person (and this continues to be about me personally, not about reviews) I have the right to speak for myself."

I refuse to debate with someone who can't actually make up their mind as to what they are saying.


message 21: by Cyna (last edited Apr 03, 2012 04:52PM) (new) - added it

Cyna And my sympathy vanishes with the rape analogy. Dear Rebecca: this, this conversation, this thread, this WHOLE debacle surrounding you? This is NOT rape. This is NOTHING like rape, absolutely NOTHING, and to even make that comparison is really fucking offensive, both to the people involved and people who've, you know, actually been raped.

Please get a clue before you have a discussion like this again. Thanks.


message 22: by [deleted user] (new)

Kat wrote: "Um...I don't think ANYONE on this thread would suggest that a girl who dresses provocatively deserves to be raped. That analogy would suggest that we have all the power and that you are defenseles..."

That was pretty tacky and downright disgusting. Arguing with an author CANNOT be compared to RAPE.


message 23: by Katie(babs) (new) - added it

Katie(babs) Comparing a bad review to rape? No words. WTF is wrong with authors?!? Stop commenting and arguing with reviewers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


message 24: by Ceilidh (new)

Ceilidh If a girl leaves her house dressed provocatively and is raped, someone would say (likely herself included) she should not have left the house dressed that way. Some will say she got what she deserved. Some will say that she could have been smarter, but that doesn't mean the rapist was right in their action either. Others will say there's just no excuse for any of it. Everyone sees things like this differently. And please bear in mind, I'm not the first person to make the comparison. The owner of absolute write did make a comment about me using a term that some people use as offensive slang towards those who have been raped. I'm sure she didn't mean it that way, though, just as some of the things I've said came across in ways other than intended. And that's why I DO respond. Because as a person (and this continues to be about me personally, not about reviews) I have the right to speak for myself.

Fuck you.


message 25: by Ceilidh (new)

Ceilidh Do you know what's comparable to rape, Mrs Hamilton? Rape. Do you know what's not comparable to it? EVERYTHING ELSE!


message 26: by Sandra (last edited Apr 03, 2012 05:08PM) (new)

Sandra Rebecca wrote: "I leave with this. If a girl leaves her house dressed provocatively and is raped, someone would say (likely herself included) she should not have left the house dressed that way. Some will say she got what she deserved. Some will say that she could have been smarter, but that doesn't mean the rapist was right in their action either. Others will say there's just no excuse for any of it."

Are you fucking serious???? Leaving the house dressed provocatively (by whose standard, I might ask - yours?) is now an excuse for rape? Are you fucking serious????

NO MEANS NO, Ms. Hamilton. NOBODY 'invites' a rape, no matter how they dress. Please educate yourself before you make ridiculous analogies like this one.


message 27: by Lyndi (new) - added it

Lyndi What part of "stop interacting with reviewers" is too hard for Rebecca to understand? I'm totally down for a little e-drama that will amuse me between preparing tax returns, but this is getting pretty bad pretty damn quick.

Dear Rebecca,
As an writer, the following terms should be familiar to you:
"Digging yourself a hole."
"Kicking a dead horse."
"Barking up the wrong tree."

Just pick one. And then stop doing it. Thanks!


message 28: by Ceilidh (new)

Ceilidh Ms Hamilton, please watch this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WGnGPA...


message 29: by Stacia (new)

Stacia Rebecca: I don't often get involved in these debates, but I honestly cannot believe you brought this analogy into this debate. You've had many chances to exit this discussion with dignity, not only here but at Absolute Write and on Twitter. I wish you had taken one of them.

If you do not understand the outrage you will provoke when you compare discussion of a publisher's merits or an author's response to a tepid review to a life-altering, brutal sexual assault, then you need to take a step back and ask yourself whether allowing yourself to participate in online debates, particularly when you are doing so emotionally rather than rationally, is a good idea.


message 31: by Lyndi (new) - added it

Lyndi She must be self-publishing a book of her online posts. I can't imagine she has that much to say otherwise.


message 32: by Helen (last edited Apr 03, 2012 06:00PM) (new) - added it

Helen Katie(babs) wrote: "Ahem http://www.beccahamiltonbooks.com/201..."

"After the review approach fell flat, the next thing that happened was a plethora of interesting “shelving” on Goodreads.com. (never-ever-read, will-never-read, will-not-read, are-you-freaking-kidding-me, author-actions, will-not-read-due-to-author, bad-author-behavior, not-reading-because-of-author, authors-behaving-badly, bad-author-behaviour, not-in-this-lifetime)…"
Stalker much?

"The one thing *I* admit I am not getting (as some have said I obviously don’t get it) is how you follow someone all over the internet (several blogs, websites, twitter, both of their personal blogs), etc, taking screenshots of select things they have said and spend hours compiling a post (roast?) … and then say “She is claim­ing that we stalked her … I’m not sure how it’s pos­si­ble.”"
What I don't get is how you manage to track down every single person who wrote something you consider unflattering. Now that takes "dedication", as opposed to various people mentioning your and your excesses only to a person who knows a person who knows a person that knows that evidence is necessary and therefore is archiving them.

"I don’t know. I am claiming that you followed me all over the web. Because you did. You posted the evidence yourself."
So then you followed all of us. And posted the evidence yourself.

And even her supporters tell her to "be a duck" and just ignore.

There is only one way to describe this:
Photobucket


Ruby Slippers Rebecca wrote: "I leave with this. If a girl leaves her house dressed provocatively and is raped, someone would say (likely herself included) she should not have left the house dressed that way. Some will say she got what she deserved. Some will say that she could have been smarter, but that doesn't mean the rapist was right in their action either. Others will say there's just no excuse for any of it. Everyone sees things like this differently."

How fucking dare you. Anyone who thinks that someone deserved to be raped is wrong. And you are wrong for even trying to use it as an analogy.

Rebecca wrote: "And while some people may twist that, I choose to do so because I have faith in the onlookers who are too mild-natured to speak up but are intelligent enough to judge me for themselves."

Trust me, they are judging you, right now.


message 34: by Elle (new)

Elle *Random onlooker jumping in to give her own opinion*

Wow, I may have to create an 'avoid' shelf just for Ms. Hamilton despite my innate laziness when it comes to such things (note I have no custom shelves whatsoever). I was planning to read 'The Forever Girl' since my friend recommended it and it seems like something I'd enjoy. Even after reading through the blog and AW thread in question - every single post - I was still willing to try it solely due to curiosity. With the posts on here, however, and the last one in particular, I'm returning the book to my friend first thing in the morning. Sorry Ms. Hamilton - I'm sure you're a great person in real life and just have an extremely bad case of verbal diarrhea, but even as a person you're currently being one that I wouldn't want to associate with. At all.


message 35: by Kat Kennedy (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy Urban Dictionary:

1. ButtHurt 2125 up, 381 down

An inappropriately strong negative emotional response from a perceived personal insult. Characterized by strong feelings of shame. Frequently associated with a cessation of communication and overt hostility towards the "aggressor."
Adam got butthurt when Mike stole his bitch.
buy butthurt mugs & shirts
by Kent Apr 19, 2003 share this add a video
2. butthurt 941 up, 260 down

Getting your feelings hurt, being offended or getting all bent out of shape because of something petty or stupid.

Roney got butthurt when Drew did not help him clean Scat
buy butthurt mugs & shirts
offended petty stupid whiny pissed off
by Ms. Penguin Jul 14, 2006 share this add a video
3. ButtHurt 766 up, 314 down

getting your feelings hurt, or getting all bent out of shape.
He got all butt hurt when she wouldnt give him a ride.

-http://www.urbandictionary.com/define...

Nothing there. NOTHING. Nothing says anything about rape. You have officially descended this argument into something it's not and based on the above example - have just done the very same twisting you are accusing us of.


message 36: by Leslie (new)

Leslie Ferdinand Dear Ms. Hamilton,

Generally, I stay away from such discussions. I prefer to follow in silence. But your analogy is not only thoughtless but a gross negligence on your part and has touched upon something deeply personal. No one deserves to be sexually assaulted. By your comment, it is obvious you've never been subjected to the terror, humiliation, and shame that a rape/assault brings on the VICTIM. Nor have you considered how a rape can affect a person's entire outlook on her life. A bad review is like a rape? Really? REALLY? Your comment is ignorant, insulting and obtuse. Please note, I said your comment, not you. But it is just the type of comments that you made that keep so many rape victims silent. If you were trying to be entertaining, you weren't. If you are trying to play the victim, you aren't. Writers who receive bad reviews aren't victims. When we write our books and put them out there, we want good reviews. Receiving a bad review goes with the territory of making your work available to the public. If you want to engage a reviewer, you thank them, bad review or not. They didn't have to take them time to read your book. I have made it a practice to thank agents and editors who reject my work. Put on your big girl panties (or as I normally say, grow some balls), know that there's no review of a BOOK that is a personal attack on the AUTHOR and then thank your lucky stars that reviewers are out there. Without them, where would our books be? Yes, bad reviews suck. But they help me to learn, too. Do your fellow writers a favor and act with class and dignity. So, bad review or not, a quick thank-you suffices whether a reviewer acknowledges it or not. And then? Move. The. Hell. On.


message 37: by Colette (new) - added it

Colette Pauline Helen wrote: "Katie(babs) wrote: "Ahem http://www.beccahamiltonbooks.com/201..."

"After the review approach fell flat, the next thing that happened was a plethora of interesting “shelving” ..."


Im certainly judging that. Comparing a written report, an OPINION, to something that scares a person forever causes so much mental and physical damage is just....disgraceful.
People reading this who haven't said anything, who have been touched by this terrible action of rape, can you imagine what memories they're reliving? NO ONE has any right to do that, especially when it's comparing a horrible moment to a bad review.


message 38: by Cyna (last edited Apr 03, 2012 06:47PM) (new) - added it

Cyna Rebecca wrote: "1) I am not implying anyone here has suggested anyting about anyone who was raped. I am referring to the owner of AW using the word "butthurt" on Twitter, as I believe they used that word not knowi..."

No, no, again, you're totally missing the point. We're not pissed because you're saying *WE* suggested anything related to rape, we're pissed because YOU compared YOUR so-called "persecution" to being raped, which it really, really IS NOT. I'm sorry that you were a victim of rape yourself, but you'd think that as one, you would know better than to throw around that analogy lightly.

Nothing there. NOTHING. Nothing says anything about rape. You have officially descended this argument into something it's not and based on the above example - have just done the very same twisting you are accusing us of.

Kat, I have heard from other sources that the word butthurt was derived from instances of rape, but more importantly, to some people that is what it a subject that it brings up, so IMO, she does have something there.


message 39: by Elle (new)

Elle Ms. Hamilton, it's perfectly fine to bring up facts from your personal life if you find them relevant to whatever you're doing online. But out of pure and honest curiosity, what are you attempting to achieve by saying you were raped? What's your goal?

Maybe you're attempting to provide a rebuttal to the people offended by your comparison of this to rape. I'll be honest - that blog post with the whole 'crazy' debacle in the comments section? I actually found your use of the word 'crazy' extremely offensive because it is among the insults thrown at my twin brother by bullies at his old school. You may not have meant it as an insult, but people saw it as one the same way you seem to take the casual use of 'butthurt' to heart. You felt that the other comments were attacking you unfairly because you said it in another meaning. If you don't like being subjected to that, why would you wish it on someone else?

You are referring to the owner of AW using the word 'butthurt' on Twitter. You say yourself that they may not know the alternate meaning of the word (I'm not aware of an alternate meaning in the first place, but fine). Still, it's obvious that she meant it as in an extremely negative response. The tweet's pretty much saying that if someone gets all upset and personal about the closing of the thread, then tough. Anyone can see that - it's direct and to the point.

You're doing the same thing you accuse others of doing - namely, taking a word completely out of context and twisting it. Besides, my question still stands - what on earth are you trying to achieve by bringing up rape?


message 40: by Kat Kennedy (last edited Apr 03, 2012 06:50PM) (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy The word, in the context of the sentence, is not referring to rape in ANYWAY. it is a common expression for someone who is overly hurt by something. I can understand that it may be linked to rape in some fashion, but it was certainly not used in that context here.

And if Hamilton can argue that her use of the word crazy is legit but that this use of a very common expression is not - well, that's just the worst kind of hypocrisy.

One person saying Hamilton is butthurt does not give her a free pass to use a rape analogy for bad reviews.


message 41: by Helen (new) - added it

Helen Elaine wrote: "Ms. Hamilton, it's perfectly fine to bring up facts from your personal life if you find them relevant to whatever you're doing online. But out of pure and honest curiosity, what are you attempting..."

Hypocrisy, thy name is Hamilton.


message 42: by Amanda (new) - added it

Amanda The Book Slayer Why is it when a reviewer says they didn't like or even hate a book, the author thinks we don't like or hate them? Seriously, it is getting old. OLD I TELL YOU!!!

I will add to Leslie and say, Get the Hell Over It!


Cassi aka Snow White Haggard Why the hell are you trying to muddy the discussion with a comparison to rape? Who in the right mind thinks its OKAY in an argument to compare themselves to a victim of rape?

Seriously I don't need to judge you by anything else you said. That comment alone exceeds my quotient for stupidity.


message 44: by Cyna (new) - added it

Cyna Kat wrote: "The word, in the context of the sentence, is not referring to rape in ANYWAY. it is a common expression for someone who is overly hurt by something. I can understand that it may be linked to rape..."

This is true, and it doesn't, I'm not saying that. I'm just saying, just because she's being hypocritical about how words are used doesn't mean we have to be.

But that tweet about being "butthurt" was irrelevant to the discussion anyway until she brought it up in this last comment. It's derailing. AGAIN.


Vanessa *Bluest Ribbon* Rebecca dear, you seem like a perfectly logical human being (not) so let me tell you something...

STOP

Whatever you're doing/typing/thinking right now, JUST STOP.

It's obviously clear that you are digging your own grave and not even aware of it.

Tell you what, instead of arguing with other people, sorry, arguing is not the term right - I mean getting sympathy and failing on it - why don't you do something productive with your time? Say writing a sequel or a new novel. Or you can cook. Or get a puppy! I heard they're are a joy to be with.

In short Rebecca, why don't you shut up? Can't you see? All of your arguments are IRRELEVANT and you're making people angry. You don't want people angry at you, right? So just get off your high horse and shut up.


message 46: by Kat Kennedy (new) - added it

Kat Kennedy I know Cyna. Perhaps because I have never heard the rape connotation to this word and I saw it as completely irrelevant to anything.

Then I had a little mind implosion.

I apologize if I snapped.


message 47: by Rhiannon (new) - added it

Rhiannon I try very hard to stay away from discussions that are heated, but when I see anyone making comparisons about rape in such a relaxed and f***ked up way, I can't sit back and let it fly by... because I myself have been sexually assaulted and the kind of whirlwind emotional catatonic feeling that it created for a month was not fun when you are only 17 years old (happened 8 years ago), let alone I'm still paranoid till this day (even after therapy). I've gotten told I'm a "whore", "slut", etc... after it happened. I've even had an ex BF who said I had it coming because of what happened.

There are going to be closed minded individuals out there that think if we get raped, we deserved every ounce of physical, psychological, and emotional pain that was thrown upon us. We don't ask for it... we don't ask to fear every dark parking lot, street, corner, etc... we walk down/by.... we don't ask to always feel closed off or cold to men... we don't ask for reminders at random moments, even when we are over it.

The physical pain is gone from a sexual assault victim, but the emotional pain is a scar on the brain that never heals. It's like someone who loose an arm or leg, the phantom feeling never goes away, but you manage to get by as best you can.

So please, just... don't make anymore comments about victims of rape/sexual assault.


message 48: by Misskitty_06 (new)

Misskitty_06 Oh my god, Rebecca Hamilton. Just. Shut. Up.


message 49: by Lyndi (last edited Apr 03, 2012 07:56PM) (new) - added it

Lyndi The pack mentality? No, this is just you pissing off a whole lot of people and trying desperately to avoid taking personal responsibility for your own comments. You are completely incapable of apologizing or admitting, without additional excuses and clauses, that you are wrong or at fault. "I apologize, even though..." and "Although most people don't think I'm wrong, I'll apologize..." It's truly a shame watching you do this to yourself as we've all told you to just stop.

Please note, Rebecca, that you keep coming back here. We haven't followed you. If it scares you so much, stay the fuck away.


message 50: by Steph (last edited Apr 03, 2012 07:55PM) (new) - added it

Steph Sinclair Of course, enter the silent lurkers who are agreeing with you. I'm afraid you already played that card in the AW forum.

Welcome to my blocked list.


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