so this is why i hate reviewing advanced readers' copies. after the thrill of "yayyyyy, i have something that youuuu don't have" wears off, i am stuck here with a book that was good, but didn't blow my mind. and now i have to be all critical about it, and it can't even defend itself yet. and it is probably one of those books that is going to be wildly successful and then i will be the lone voice in the wilderness on record as not loving it and all the internet will laugh at me.

not that i lack the courage of my convictions.

it's just hard being me, sometimes.

this is another post-apoc story that wants us to reexamine what it means to be human. okay, i can do that. if only it weren't so frustrating to be asked to do it so often, and so shallowly, all the time.i'm not saying the book is shallow - it has some great moments in it, and a lot of the writing is taut and appealing. but i get so fed up with characters in situations like these who keep trying to hold on to moral structures that no longer apply to their circumstances. seriously, cast of walking dead - recognize that you just cannot rebuild the world that was on top of the embers of the world that is. time to start over. new game plan. stop with the talking and the nicey-nice and man up. and this, too. it is great to have the impulse to save the young blind girl from the creepy advances of the male members of her family, but the reality of the two of you making your way through the blighted landscape with limited resources and "people" who want to kill and eat you? that right there is a burden you have accepted. and if you choose to take on that burden, sometimes you gotta take a life. no? you refuse? interesting choice. hope that doesn't come back to - oh, look out!

it's nice to want to give food to strangers passing by. it is nice to retain the vestiges of humanity. and i am not saying you have to become a blood-smeared warrior with a string of ears on your belt, but at some point this pollyanna attitude become unrealistic. but i suppose it is the impulse of a person who carries around a sealed and unread letter for most of the book. a person without curiosity, who is fine as a literary-person standing in for an idea(l), but i like to read these books for tips i can actually use. no role model for me, here.

the structure is a good call - shifting in between "now" and "then" - bringing the two stories ever closer together. she has a good sense of timing and drama, and it is a book i found myself flying through, wanting to know its secrets. so, a good page-turner. but there are times when you just want to pat her on the head and say, "there, there, dearie, not everything needs to be a metaphor." because it sometimes gets away from her.

he jerks me backwards and pulls me against him until his gut it a stuffed IHOP pancake bulging against my back.

she doesn't know that i'm making it up as i go along. pulling it out of my ass like my butt is a magician's hat.

etcetera.

the less i say about the romantic plot, the better. there is no level on which it makes sense to me.

ditto on the "bad guy." pure horror-movie indefatigable meta-evil that is too cartoonish to be threatening.

but not bad overall, despite my growling. i am probably just being overpicky. i thought it started out wonderfully, but somewhere along the way, it lost itself, and kind of muddled on to an ending that made me shrug and say, "whatever, you win, i give up."

and those of you that have this on your YA shelves?? get it off immediately. go on, do it. this is most definitely not for a YA audience. rape and incest and massive human and animal deaths, cannibalism, mutants, that i can see, but (view spoiler)[corkscrew-abortion??? (hide spoiler)] that goes one step too far. and i doubt a YA audience would believe the love story, either.