K.D. Absolutely's Reviews > The Truth About Forever

The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen
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Apr 04, 12

bookshelves: romance, drama, ya, chick-lit, tfg-100, populist
Recommended to K.D. by: TFG 100 Favorite Books (2011 edition)
Read from February 27 to April 04, 2012, read count: 1

I thank this book for giving me an important insight on what could be going on in the mind of a 16-year old girl in today's world.

You see, I am a father of a girl of that same age. The age of the Macy, the narrator-main protagonist of this book.

My daughter is my only child. For the past 16 years, I have been trying to be a good father. But what is a good father? Since there is no school in good parenting, most of my styles come from what I thought were the good points my father showed me or what I thought he should have done or showed to me but he did not. This could be wrong. Reasons: (1) Those experiences were for a father-son relationship; (2) I grew up with 3 other siblings; (3) I was 16, 31 years ago - almost 1 generation in between. So, times, indeed changed already.

Macy loves his father. They run together every morning. The father dies of heart attack one morning when Macy is too lazy getting up from bed. So, Macy thinks that her father would still be alive if she was not lazy that morning. She blames herself but she doesn't tell this to anyone. As an outlet for this guilt, she tries to excel in everything she does: in school, in the library where she works or in her occasional job at Wish Catering. She thinks that by being excellent, she will be able to please her dead father and that somehow will ease up her guilt.

Since the birth of my daughter, I've been trying to be a hands-on dad. When I was growing up, my father was almost always at home because he was a plantation owner so he did not have to work at all. So, in a way, he was there when I needed him but just like many "traditional" fathers: he was distant especially when he was busy playing chess, drinking with his friends or reading newspaper. He stayed seven years in college but was not a diligent (my impression) student and I could not remember an instance when he helped me with my homework except to correct my grammar or pronunciation when I read aloud my speeches prepared as required by my teachers. I knew that my father was proud of us when we got good grades, medals or distinctions for excellent performance in school but he did not show any emotion in front of us. I thought that I would have been happier as a child if he jumped up and down when I bought home medals from school or when it was announced that I was in the top 4 of my graduating clss in high school.

So, when I became a father, I was like that. Always jumping up and down and really appreciative of whatever good news my daughter told me. Each day. Each school report card. Each school year. I always tried attending her school events. I was always eager listening to whatever news she brought home from school. Pre-school. Elementary. High school.

Little did I know that she was feeling the pressure. She thought that I was expecting too much from her. She thought that I would like her to achieve what I achieved. I knew this not even from my wife but from my wife's older sister who was closed to my daughter.

So, where did I go wrong? Where is that balance between too little and too much?

That was the dilemma of Macy in this book, The Truth About Forever. Where is that point to strike and the seesaw will stand still? She thinks that Jason does not love her despite her trying to do her best in her work in the library. She feels the pressure that she has brought to herself. She assumes so many things that the unnecessary emotions have bottled up and so the seesaw is not balanced and her feelings are all mixed up and her life is in turmoil.

I'm too old to appreciate her romance with the tattooed Wes and I did not really care about his dark past. Maybe my daughter would love this book. But for me, I still liked this but not for that reason, that same reason why my Goodreads friends, liked this.

I read this as a father and I liked it.

Thank you, Tina, for recommending this book. Thank you, Sheryl for lending me this copy! Thank you, Maria for being my reading buddy. I struggled finishing this book. I felt the pressure but it was worth it! Thank you! Thank you!
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Comments (showing 1-28)

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message 28: by s.penkevich (new)

s.penkevich Wonderful review. It was especially touching as I also have a daughter, this was good advice for the coming years when she will be of school age.

message 27: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Thanks, S. You liked it while I was still correcting my errors hahahaha.

Joselito Honestly and Brilliantly You father reached 3rd year law proper so that's at least 7 years of college.

message 25: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Hahaha. I was a trying to be an unreliable narrator hahahahaha. I corrected it already. Thanks!

message 24: by karen (new)

karen K.D. wrote: "Thanks, S. You liked it while I was still correcting my errors hahahaha."

and now you are on the other end of it!

message 23: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely But you have more fans, Karen!!! hahahahaha.

message 22: by Priyanka (new) - added it

Priyanka Beautiful review, K.D. I felt really moved by your review.

message 21: by B0nnie (new)

B0nnie thank you K.D., for this review

Andrea What an amazing review...I just finished reading this book last night and I liked it. But its really good to hear from your point of view as a father :)

message 19: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Thank you, Priyanka and Andrea.

Bonnie, you're welcome. Always. :)

message 18: by Elizabeth (new)

Elizabeth If u are trying to be a good dad u are a good dad! Daughters can just not be on the same page as u or being up to what u wanna do. Just keep your head up and one day she will realize.

message 17: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Elizabeth, thank you.

message 16: by Loubylou (new) - added it

Loubylou How touching was your review K.D. We can only do our best for our children..as uyou say we become parents...we are not born as them. Any one thing we do as our believed best is an effort to give what we can. It is so vital that we reflect and use others experiences (including books) to help us do just that. Lovely review.

message 15: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Thank you, Loubylou (what a name). :)

Joelle Wonderful review, great inputs. I read the book but was so focused on Macy's point of view that I never considered this aspect you elaborated. As a teenager, one's job is to complain one way or another so there will always be something :P But I'm sure you're a great dad!

message 13: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Thank you, Joelle. I am always trying to be a good Dad. :)

_dropaheart Aw this was such a sweet review

message 11: by K.D. (new) - rated it 2 stars

K.D. Absolutely Thanks, dropaheart. :)

message 10: by [deleted user] (new)

Beautiful touching review, I am now putting this book in my to be read list.

K.D. Absolutely Ngozi, hope you'll like it. Thanks! :)

message 8: by Jucilene (new)

Jucilene Oh God, I'll skip that recommendation, but then a I read your review, and this is so honest and touching... I changed my mind, that's will the next read, for sure. ThankU for sharing your opinion.

K.D. Absolutely Jucilene, sweet... thank you!

message 6: by [deleted user] (new)

I hope your daughter has read this review. It's lovely. :)

K.D. Absolutely Lauren, maybe she did. She just did not comment. She knows that I have this mushy side. :) Thanks!

Audrey This is an amazing review :) I hope your daughter reads this one day :)

K.D. Absolutely I think she has. Thanks, Audrey.

message 2: by Albert (new)

Albert Barnedo Awww! Believe me, sir. You're a good father. I hope my father also reads what I read so we can talk about it. You're cool!

K.D. Absolutely Albert wrote: "Awww! Believe me, sir. You're a good father. I hope my father also reads what I read so we can talk about it. You're cool!"

Thank you, Albert!

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