Hope's Reviews > The Language of Love & Respect: Cracking the Communication Code with Your Mate

The Language of Love & Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
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Feb 08, 12

bookshelves: christian, marriage
Read in February, 2012

What a good little book. I have to admit that at times it seemed over-simplified in a forced kind of way. Maybe to appeal to the lowest common denominator, or to avoid offending. This was particularly apparent in the real-life examples that were used. However, once I caught on to the rhythm of the book I was able to skip over those parts and get right to the juicy nuggets of wisdom. The most powerful message of this book is that we all have basic God-given needs. For women, it is the need to feel LOVED by her husband. For men, it is the need to feel RESPECTED by his wife. What makes it powerful however, is that we are called by God to honor and fulfill these needs for our spouse REGARDLESS of whether we feel like it or not, and whether they deserve it or not. Wives, give your husband UNCONDITIONAL RESPECT. Husbands, give your wife UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. What was a true revelation for me is the thought that it is not about your spouse, but ultimately about your relationship with God. Ah! Beautiful. We do this because we are commanded by God to do so. We do this because we want to honor and obey and serve and bless God. In the book, Mr. Eggerichs suggests using this profoundly simple thought: imagine Jesus just beyond the shoulder of your spouse. In this way we can learn to choose what it holy and right. Not because of yourself, not because of your spouse, but because of God. Because I skipped a significant portion of this book, it was a quick read. It is actually the second book written as a follow up to the original "Love & Respect." I have a sneaking suspicion that I would enjoy that one better. Still. I recommend giving this one a read. There is some very important stuff in there!
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