Amanda's Reviews > Blood Noir

Blood Noir by Laurell K. Hamilton
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Jun 10, 2008

did not like it
Recommended for: Absoluetly no one, I'm embarrased I even read it

LKH has a talent for stretching out a single, seemingly pointless scene into chapters of painful-to-read dialogue between characters that does nothing to further the plot. In the course of the last 5 books, Anitas harem of men have become amaeteur therapists for Anita, making unbelievable and often ridiculous observations (re: her beauty, innocence, naivitee, selflessness, etc) that she herself (we are supposed to believe) has never considered. These eye-rolling therapy sessions provide unconvincing justification for Anita's dramatic 180-degree character reversal, in which she transformed from a self-righteous, morally-superior paragon of justice into an intrepid, promiscuous supporter of the BSDM scene.

The plot: Jason's father is dying of cancer and he wants Anita to accompany him home and pretend to be his girlfriend to correct his father's false impression of him as gay. Upon their arrival, Jason's uncanny resemblance to his cousin, the son of a presidential hopeful, creates a media furor over a case of mistaken identity that also has causes problems for Jean-Claude among the vampire community when its reported that Anita has left Jean-Clause to marry his pomme de sang. During the uproar, Marmee Noir the momother of all vampires makes another play at waking from her millennium-old sleep (which she's been doing for the last 3 books now???) and causes trouble for Anita by trying to possess her.

What to expect: more campy self-revelations by Anita as told from the p-of-v of multiple, fawning male studs, boring it-takes-me-three-chapters-to-write-this-scene sex, and another attempt by the author to villify Richard. (Incidentally, he remains the only lover in Anita's revolving harem who doesn't fawn all over her, which is perhaps the reason his is written as a such a pathetic, self-loathing sap.)

Who's missing: Jean-Claude has a phone conversation with Anita, but otherwise remains absent; Asher is mentioned in passing; Damien is missing entirely (thank God!); Edward is on hiatus.

Anita's new conquests: Crispin, a 21-year-old weretiger and Alex Pinn, another weretiger, both of whom she "mind-rolls" with the ardeur under the spell of Marmee Noir.

The plus: you don't have to read the 4-chapter miniumum of gratuitous sex between them since Anita wakes up with amnesia in the hotel room after a 2-say sexathon with the new guys.

Anita's new powers: she magically takes back her "rage" from Richard, gains Jason as her personal animal to call, and Richard gains the power to roll Anita with his own form of ardeur that only works on Anita

The plot thread left hanging: the other masters of the city perceive Jean-Claude as weak because Anita is screwing multiple men, but he's monogomous to her, and the only way to correct this (in the world of LKH) is for Anita to allow Jean-Claude to start having sex with other men for real. Oh, and Anita may need to deliberately infect herself with other wereanimal viruses to combat the 2 tigers she has now.
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Comments (showing 1-2 of 2) (2 new)

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Vfields Don't touch my happy! You're not the only one whose embarrassed they keep picking up her books.


Kelly I totally agree with you, Alex, so wonderful review! LOL!!!


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