K's Reviews > The Mother Dance: How Children Change Your Life

The Mother Dance by Harriet Lerner
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's review
Jun 09, 08

bookshelves: professionallit

Reading Harriet Lerner is like talking with that great friend you have -- the one who's funny, insightful, and opinionated but sufficiently endearing that you can forgive her shooting her mouth off.

That said, I didn't find this book nearly as insightful as "The Dance of Anger." Harriet gave a voice to many things that mothers feel and experience, but nothing she said really grabbed me and as a result, I found the book a little slow-going.

I also found her a little preachy in terms of her ideas about mothers needing to work more and fathers needing to work less. While I do see her points from a systems perspective (Bowen theory is all about spouses getting polarized into specific roles as opposed to developing a wide range of functioning), I think that it will be a long time before the world accommodates half-weeks for both men and women, and meanwhile, one parent's staying home with your kids is a more realistic option if you're seeking to avoid the problem of childcare.

The other Harriet Lerner books I ordered look more promising, so here's hoping. Meanwhile, though, I'm going to take a little break from self-help/psychology.

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