Cathy Keaton's Reviews > Hexed

Hexed by Kevin Hearne
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's review
Jan 11, 2012

it was amazing
bookshelves: i-own, read-in-2011, faves, reviewed
Read from December 19 to 21, 2011

My favorite Adult read of 2011.

Okay, I'm pretty sure I cracked a rib laughing through this one, since I can feel the pain in my right side. This book went to epic levels of hilarity, and I could not—NOT put it down. That, for me, is saying a lot, because I usually have no trouble putting a book down and doing other stuff. But, not with Hexed. Atticus put a binding spell on my copy, so when I started to read it, I could only get about 10 feet from it before I found myself right back at the bookshelf I keep it on. It was the weirdest thing ever!

I say this only because I am completely convinced that Atticus is real, and so are all the other amazing characters in this series. Kevin Hearne does a brilliant job of giving each of his important characters detailed little nuances that all real people have—for example, Atticus loves omelets for breakfast and whole wheat toast with orange marmalade. Oberon loves steak (of course, what dog doesn't?). It's things like this that make me believe that they both actually live in the Tempe, Arizona area and that if only I'd drive over there, I might find Atticus' house, and run into his super hot vampire attorney, the famous Leif Helgarson!

Uh, oh... Here comes a long spiel (or squeal?) on how much I love the vampire Leif Helgarson, the famous vampire who isn't famous—or, at least everybody in the book seems to know who he is, yet Atticus can't figure out why, since the man himself claims he is not famous. He is the reason my rib is busted because he's just so ridiculously hilarious, I couldn't not laugh hard enough to crack it. I found myself obsessively reading this book because I just wanted to find out more about Leif…

Here is he is in a nutshell: Imagine an English butler trying to talk like any typical college frat boy. Now, make sure he's pronouncing everything the way an English butler would, very stuffy-sounding and proper, but using all those hip and cool phrases, like “I'm chill, how 'bout you?” or “Throw down!” when he wants to start a fight. But, of course, he's not even using the correct slang, and saying these phrases more like, “I am cold,” or “Throw up!” Now, you have the most epic vampire in fictional existence trying to be cool, and that fella's name is Leif Helgarson. Leif is the raddest, baddest vampire dude ever, and he makes Dracula look like the mosquito of undead bloodsuckers. (He hates Dracula, by the way.)

If you're a nerd like me, and you want to read a fun and funny book filled with forever quotable quotes and quips, then look no further, folks. <— (This sentence has two sets of literary alliteration—go me!) This book is for y'all. If you want to read about crazy, wacky characters and all their antics, and how all the gods and goddesses in every mythology from world history are able to converge together in the same 10-mile radius, and, well, not get along with each other (as you would imagine they would not), then read the Iron Druid Chronicles. I just barely squeezed in reading these before the year ended, but they are already my favorite reads of the entire year of 2011. Mr. Hearne cannot write these books fast enough!

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Quotes Cathy Liked

Kevin Hearne
“Oh. Oberon looked at me. I know that has to make you sad. But call to me instead, Atticus. I'll always answer. Your fly has been open all this time, by the way, and Granuaile hasn't said a thing.

Thanks, buddy, I said silently as I tried to surreptitiously zip up my jeans.

See? I got your back AND your front. I deserve a treat.”
Kevin Hearne, Hexed
tags: humor

Kevin Hearne
“My neighbor raised a shaking index finger to point at the saguaro. "That moving cactus...and the big bug...and you, you spooky bastard. What are you?

I stuffed my hands in my pockets and grinned winningly at him. "Why, I'm the Antichrist, of course.”
Kevin Hearne, Hexed
tags: humor

Kevin Hearne
“Well o' course she's feelin' dandy! She's the mother o' God for the love o' Pete!”
Kevin Hearne, Hexed

Kevin Hearne
“I had an ASU student looking for it in my shop last week, and he defined the Bacchants for me as 'those drunk chicks who killed that one dude because he wouldn't have sex with them.' His professors must be so proud. I asked him if he knew what maenads were, and instead of correctly answering that it was just another name for Bacchants, he bizarrely thought I was referring to my own testicles - as in, "'Ere now, mate, don't swing that bat around me nads.'" The conversation deteriorated quickly after that.”
Kevin Hearne, Hexed

Reading Progress

12/19/2011 page 74
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