The Blessing- Giving the Gift of Unconditional Love and Acceptance
John Trent and Gary Smalley have outlined some important actions parents (and spouses or friends) can take towards encouraging and blessing the people around them. Through the five elements that make up what they have coined as the Blessing (meaningful touch, spoken message, attaching high value, picturing a special future, and active commitment) Parents are encouraged to bless their families. There are many updated web tools people can use and a whole section of the book dedicated to healing from a broken past as well as a final section to help you pass on your own blessings.

I was anxious to read this book, as I have a 19 month old daughter and desperately want her to be well rounded and to know that she is loved. While this book is full of sound advice, I don’t think it is that deep theologically. The supporting verses seemed plucked from the Bible and sort of used out of context. Things like supporting verbalizing your blessing through the spoken word with evidence like: “When God blessed us with the gift of his Son, it was his Word that ‘became flesh and dwelt among us’ (John 1:14) God has always been a God of words.” (p. 47) simplifying Jesus’ role as the Word this way seems sort of out of place. Even the idea of the blessing stemming from Isaac blessing Jacob seems like a bit of a stretch because that had more to do with passing on the blessing of the lineage of Jesus than it did of Jacob building a strong self esteem in his children.

Please don’t get me wrong, I think that the authors have a lot of good things to say about psychology and information they have gathered from counseling, I just felt like their message was a but weakened by fluffy theology. The supporting case-studies and personal experience all rang with the truth of the need to follow their steps, I just found the book a little laborious to read (with the personal experiences, case studies, and scripture references) and quite a bit longer than it needed to be. Most of the 5 attributes of the Blessing seem to be obvious and self-explanatory, but I know that many families and people grow up without them. I think that the authors encouraging fathers especially to maintain appropriate, but meaningful touch, is especially a good reminder for people, if nothing else, it may free some people to love on their children continually as they age with appropriate hugs and pats on the shoulder.

(I received this book for free from the booksneeze program in exchange for my honest opinion.)