Josie's review
Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys
by Dan Kindlon
I have wondered to myself why that never happens in the Asian culture. Are boys that different then in the Asian community? I have heard of mass sucides or just private suicides. The Asian culture is by far the most suppressed in their emotional display and conversation. Maybe supression isn't such a bad thing or being introverted to a certain extent. Nevertheless communition must be the overiding emphasis with boys. Even in kicking a ball around seems like conversing to the less eloquent? Trish
I cannot comment for other Asian cultures, but in Japan, boys bottling up their feelings displays itself in very tragic ways. There isn't a month that goes by where I don't hear on the news about some grisly murder, where an adolescent boy has killed his whole family, because he was completely frustrated (i.e., could not/did not talk about his dissatisfaction with his life) about his situation...I think expressing your feelings to the point of being self-indulgent doesn't help anyone--except perhaps the therapist you are paying $150 hour to listen. However, teaching boys, who from culturally from a young age hear the message: "take it like a man and figure it our for yourself." It is us up to us, the parents and mentors to boys, to teach them it is okay to talk about about what makes you angry or sad or confused, and seeking the counsel of family, teachers, church and/or mentors is a good thing, because now you can use the wisdom and love of others to see you through. This is what I think is the underlying message of this book.
Josie's review
Raising Cain: Protecting the Emotional Life of Boys by Dan Kindlon
Josie's review
rating:
bookshelves:
non-fiction
Growing up in a household with only my mother and my grandmother, fate would have it that I had a son as my only child. Although, he is only nine, I can sometimes see the future as heads into puberty. This book covers all phases of a boy's life with the bulk of it concentrating on adolescent boys. It is still an invaluable resource,that I refer to time and again, to figure out "what exactly is he thinking?"...or more importantly, "feeling?"
I just watched "Bowling for Columbine" again on TV the other night, and the tragic events at that school six years ago left me just as stunned as the first time. As parents, teachers, siblings, and mentors of boys, we must communicate reinfore to them that it is healthy and normal to display your feelings, and teach them the way to do it. This book cites many examples where we can all nod our heads in agreement. Too many times "acting like a man," in the face of emotional pain, ends up in horrifying res
I just watched "Bowling for Columbine" again on TV the other night, and the tragic events at that school six years ago left me just as stunned as the first time. As parents, teachers, siblings, and mentors of boys, we must communicate reinfore to them that it is healthy and normal to display your feelings, and teach them the way to do it. This book cites many examples where we can all nod our heads in agreement. Too many times "acting like a man," in the face of emotional pain, ends up in horrifying res
I have wondered to myself why that never happens in the Asian culture. Are boys that different then in the Asian community? I have heard of mass sucides or just private suicides. The Asian culture is by far the most suppressed in their emotional display and conversation. Maybe supression isn't such a bad thing or being introverted to a certain extent. Nevertheless communition must be the overiding emphasis with boys. Even in kicking a ball around seems like conversing to the less eloquent? Trish
I cannot comment for other Asian cultures, but in Japan, boys bottling up their feelings displays itself in very tragic ways. There isn't a month that goes by where I don't hear on the news about some grisly murder, where an adolescent boy has killed his whole family, because he was completely frustrated (i.e., could not/did not talk about his dissatisfaction with his life) about his situation...I think expressing your feelings to the point of being self-indulgent doesn't help anyone--except perhaps the therapist you are paying $150 hour to listen. However, teaching boys, who from culturally from a young age hear the message: "take it like a man and figure it our for yourself." It is us up to us, the parents and mentors to boys, to teach them it is okay to talk about about what makes you angry or sad or confused, and seeking the counsel of family, teachers, church and/or mentors is a good thing, because now you can use the wisdom and love of others to see you through. This is what I think is the underlying message of this book.
