Laurel's Reviews > City of Bones

City of Bones by Cassandra Clare
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Jan 28, 12

bookshelves: ya, um-what, sigh, fantasy, meh, uh-oh, wish-it-were-better, who-let-you-be-heroine
Read from December 19, 2011 to January 26, 2012, read count: 2


*Spoilers yeah*

I’m going to say this now so it’s out of the way.
No.
I’ve never read the Draco Trilogy by Cassandra Claire on fanfiction.net.

No.
I have no right to mention the plagiarism event around the Draco Trilogy in this review, because I have not read it, and so I will not go into the plagiarism event.

Yes.
I know of the plagiarism, and I find it despicable, but I’m not reviewing that, I’m reviewing City of Bones.

THE CITY OF BONES REREAD WITH PALICE AND GHIRARDELLI

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It started EPIC, then tapered to a molasses read but who really cares. It’s done now and that’s that! But onto MY review!

THE REVIEW STARRING GHIRARDELLI CHOCOLATE

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Thaaaaaaat’s ME!

BACKSTORY. When I first spotted City of Bones, I saw the cover and thought, “Hmm...interesting designs. Kinda weird, but I rather like it...” Drew me in, so I read the blurb, said, “Lol kay” and purchased it. What I remember after that first read was Clary, Jace, Alec, Isabelle, Abbadon, the Star Wars copycat sibling scene, and Jocelyn still being in a coma. Of all those things, Momma Fray still being in a coma pissed me off the most, and I dropped the series because of that alone.

Fast forward to Ghirardelli present day with more of a brain. Now I got a sense of plot, character arc/development, themes, literary devices, and a fresh love for reading. Now, with this knowledge, City of Bones angers me even further without Momma Fray’s limp body.

Le blurb:
Clarissa, or Clary Fray (Clare...Clary...*sigh*) is a 15 year-old girl who is somehow allowed into a club and meets a bunch of Shadowhunters who kill a demon party goer. They’re like, “SHOOT SHE KNOWS” and she goes off on an adventure after she finds her apartment totaled by a Ravener demon thang and her mother not where she last left her.

Aww yeah here we go!

The writing...
The. Writing.
THE WRITING.

I cannot begin to fathom just WHAT is going on with this prose. I’ll admit that there are a few moments where the descriptions of certain areas are vivid and near perfect
Ex: When Clary finds Jace with Valentine. That gold room with the velvet curtains and all that. Woooow lovely image.Also, with Abbadon. Fuck guys, I don’t wanna get NEAR whatever that thing was. Yeesh, I’ll just hide in my bed thanks.

But at the same time, with this descriptions, Clare likes to drop about a bajillion these on us:

“Moonlight ran like silver water...”
“...stinging and aching, like raw meat.”
“The apple tasted green and cool.”
“Leaving the Institute was like climbing into a wet, hot canvas bag.”
“...pale gold pollen as light as talcum.”


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WHAT.
NONE OF THOSE SIMILES EVEN MAKE SENSE.
CLARE...

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Honestly, I’ve never seen so many similes in one book ever.
EVER.
This is literary technique abuse in its natural habitat. I honestly thought Twilight was bad with the thesaurus raping, but Clare is nearly there with all of these nonsensical similes! Yes, some of them indeed worked, but having this army of them got me out of the story so quickly by about the 20th one that I was groaning every time the words ‘like’ or ‘as if’ came up.

This nonsense is an example of telling us someone’s reaction, rather than showing us. YOu know the whole SHOW, don’t TELL thing. There’s a moment where Jace’s tension is described as a downed electrical wire or something, but that doesn’t show me anything. It’s showing me the image of a live wire on some ground. Is Jace writhing on the ground in frustration or...? Whatever.

I also felt...bored. Excluding Luke’s POV and Abbadon’s chapter, I just sat and twiddled my thumbs. Nothing was interesting to me. The Ravener battle seemed meh and the encounter with Valentine SUPER lulzy.

I think it might’ve been because the POVs were switching so randomly at times. Even from page one, we have Clary scoping out the blue-haired kid, then we JUMP to his perspective and we’re forced to oblige. Here I thought we’d follow third person omniscient, which I have no quarrels with since I’m doing that myself, but the switching was so arbitrary and rapid that I was unsure if who I was reading. It may just be me, but I get so mind-boggled when I come across that. The whacked POV really threw me for a ride.

All the POV switching didn’t help the plot much, nor was the plot much to begin with. Clare seems to take a nose dive into plot with Jocelyn’s disappearance. I’m ready to go, I’m all strapped in. Then, she just kinda lets Clary float about for a while. Go get some memories, go help Simon the rat, go into a conflict between two boyz, go fetch the Mortal Cup (which we have no idea what it is or DOES until Dorothea spells it out when we’re roughly 77% done the book).

Even with the plot jumbled up like a thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle with forks and turns that made barely any sense, it was still there, and it was throughout the book and not shoved into the end. So by my standards, this book stands a little taller and prouder than others I’ve read. I’m not exaggerating that either. This book is worthy of its two stars.

I feel like the second star is for the times where I just caught myself enjoying little bits like Abbadon and Luke’s infodump. I found the battle with Abbadon to be fairly kick-butt, an I actually didn’t mind Luke’s backstory stuff so much. I started to enjoy his character a little. Speaking of characters...

CLARY CASSANDRA FRAY

I will never not hate Clary.
Clary is a cruel-hearted, whiny, and angry little girl. She contradicts herself and her own actions, she bad mouths every living soul around her, and for what? Is this supposed to make her a strurng female churuktur or something? Kicking ass and taking names because you open-handedly smack everyone around you? That’s just being mean and hateful. There is nothing appealing or likable about Clarissa Fray.

She abandons her best friend, Simon, at a poetry slam to follow the boy she barely knows, then yells at Isabelle for abandoning Simon at Magnus’ party, then she even forgets that Simon drove her and the other Shadowhunters back to Dorothea’s. This is when Simon SAVES THEIR ASSES, too.

I just can’t. Clary, you’re an idiot.

JACE WHICH WAYLAND

Our love interest, ladies and gentlemen. Tawny, tumbling gold locks, and gold eyes! Oh sweet lawd hold me!

Jace is a major asshole. Simon calls him out on it. Clary does then APOLOGIZES FOR IT (HUH?), but I still would take him over Clary. Hell, with the backstory that Jace was getting, I wouldn’t have minded if this were told from his perspective. I bet it would’ve been a lot easier (somehow), not to mention far more interesting.

I can still handle him. Like, I’m not wanting to strangle Jace like I am Clary. Jace was an ass, but he didn’t cross my line. He does have a tendency to be obnoxiously cheesy and loves to fail-snark the heck out of everything. Maybe I liked him more because his seraph blades were actually psychic-type Pokémon evolutions.

Actually, this brings me to one point, what’s up with steles? They make runes, but they can’t when someone’s got demon blood in them. OKay that’s cool. They open certain doors, and start...vampire motorcycles? What can’t they do? Can they make me a chicken sandwich? These steles don’t seem to have much going for them, like Clare said, “LOOK AT WHAT I HAVE” then drops them off for bumblefuck reasoning. Their description?

“It was a long, luminous cylinder, as thick around as an index finger and tapering to a point.”

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Come on, gotta keep your subtlety in check, Clare.

Anywho, the only thing that made me want to gouge my eyes out were the similes and Clary Fray’s behavior. Other than that, everything was just okay. It wasn’t beautiful, fabulous, or pure genius. This is certainly not genius material. Stuff I write isn’t genius material either.

But it also wasn’t the very worst thing I’ve ever read. Twilight, Halo, and Hush, Hush far exceed this book on stupidity, plot, and What-the-flying-fuck. It is a decent read, but that’s all I can really say about it.

Read it if you want, go ahead.
I just know that I don’t have to go back to this book again for any reason.
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Reading Progress

12/19/2011 page 1
0.0% "Let's start off the reread right with this gif. Palice, you can choose who you want to be! Image and video hosting by TinyPic" 2 comments
12/19/2011 page 4
1.0% "Oh I forgot this was third person omniscient. I was like, "why are we straying from Clary...?""
12/19/2011 page 7
2.0% ""Valentine is back!" Hurrr Valentine. That was the name of my first cat. Back to the situation that Clary totally should not be throwing herself into."
12/19/2011 page 8
2.0% ""I've called the police, you know." Clary, I didn't know your name was Simon!"
12/19/2011 page 10
3.0% ""Clary thought of Jace and his lion-cat eyes." As opposed to...lion-fish eyes? Why not just cat eyes? Lions ARE INDEED cats. For serious."
12/19/2011 page 11
3.0% "Simon's awesome. Please keep being awesome Simon. You'll be my escape." 12 comments
12/19/2011 page 12
3.0% "You know, poetry slams are pretty neat. I used to share Clary's opinion till I FINALLY went to one this year. They're fairly awesome. It takes lots of passion and strength to speak personally to an audience you don't know."
12/19/2011 page 14
4.0% "Clary's coming off as arrogant. No sir, I don't like it." 5 comments
12/19/2011 page 20
6.0% "I understand why Clary's aggravated, but if her mom is willing to talk to her, WHY ISN'T SHE TAKING THE CHANCE? She keeps going on about stuff she doesn't know, so GO FIND IT OUT, Clary. Rahhh"
12/19/2011 page 27
8.0% "Yes, let's have Jocelyn taken when Clary is mad at her for hiding things. That way, all the knowledge Jocelyn has will be forcibly held off until later. Well, it's got me interested I guess. And Simon was dropped off the earth, poor guy."
12/20/2011 page 36
10.0% ""It was a long, luminous cylinder, as thick around as an index finger and tapering to a point. "My stele," he said." Criminy just call it a wand and we'll move on..." 4 comments
12/20/2011 page 50
14.0% "Valentine's been dead for fifteen years huh? JUST AS LONG AS CLARY'S BEEN ALIVE. O ho ho ho."
12/20/2011 page 50
14.0% "They did not look sharp or particularly dangerous. "Sanvi, Sansanvi, and Semangelaf. They're seraph blades."" They sound like Pokémon evolutions to me." 9 comments
12/20/2011 page 56
16.0% "None of these characters are really doing anything for me except Alec. And where the fuck did Simon go?!"
12/20/2011 page 59
17.0% ""Jace had the seraph blade in his hand. He raised it, calling out:"Sansanvi!"" Do it, Sansanvi! SANSY USES PETAL DANCE. IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE."
12/20/2011 page 64
18.0% "Never have I seen so many similes and metaphors in a book. Clare is attacking those literary devices like Meyer abuses the thesaurus." 13 comments
12/20/2011 page 69
20.0% "Sanctuary? Control? Derp? WHAT ARE THESE CAPITALIZED WORDS." 2 comments
12/21/2011 page 74
21.0% "SIMON BUDDY! :D"
12/21/2011 page 78
22.0% ""'How do you stand him?' 'He saved my life.'" And then you slapped him for it, Clary. Can't forget that." 3 comments
12/21/2011 page 87
25.0% "I can't get into any of these characters." 1 comment
12/21/2011 page 90
26.0% "Well...at least Clary calls Jace out on his jerky behavior..."
12/21/2011 page 91
26.0% "WHAT THE POOP WHY ARE YOU APOLOGIZING FOR CALLING HIM OUT. Image and video hosting by TinyPic" 12 comments
12/21/2011 page 96
27.0% "OH SNAAAAAAAAAp Jocelyn was Valentine's wiiiiiife. Let's see how much sense this makes."
12/21/2011 page 98
28.0% "OH SO TERRIBLE. But we don't know what the hell the Cup IS or what it DOES specifically."
12/23/2011 page 102
29.0% ""When had Simon become Isabelle's responsibility, instead of hers?" Clary, since WHEN have you cared about Simon? You've pushed him around this whole time! AND DESERTED HIM! UUUUUURKKK"
12/23/2011 page 104
30.0% """You'd better have a good reason for waking me up."" JACE JUST HELPED YOU OUT, CLARY, OH MY GOD. Image and video hosting by TinyPic" 2 comments
12/23/2011 page 112
32.0% ""Leaving the Institute was like climbing into a wet, hot canvas bag." Oh yeah I know that feeling, I mean, haven't we all climbed into canvas bags that are about A QUARTER OF OUR SIZE TOPS? WHAT THE FUCK? Clare, did you stick your head in a wet, hot canvas bag to clarify this?" 6 comments
12/23/2011 page 128
36.0% "So...Jace asks to hold Clary's hand after she comments on the creepy darkness and she says "OMG DON'T TALK DOWN TO ME." Lol, okay then. Image and video hosting by TinyPic" 5 comments
12/23/2011 page 141
40.0% "This is just...boring me. I don't find any of this term-dropping interesting nor do I find it really building the "world" of Cassandra Clare. So you can put werewolves with kelpies and warlocks, congratulations?"
12/24/2011 page 165
47.0% "Ahhh the great raptor story from the Draco Trilogy or whatever. Poor falcon. :("
12/29/2011 page 176
50.0% ""He blinked.'"There is a fine line between sarcasm and outright hostility, and you seem to have crossed it.'" Seem? SEEM?! She's been so RUDE TO EVERYONE."
12/29/2011 page 183
52.0% "I like Magnus."
01/05/2012 page 190
54.0% "Oh Clary, so glad you care about Simon again....no seriously, let's follow Simon's POV now that he's a rodent. It'll make this story better." 3 comments
01/05/2012 page 191
54.0% ""She'd never wanted to smack anyone as much as she wanted to smack Isabelle right at that moment. 'I can't believe you just left him...'" My rage is threatning to boil over. You know what? JUST KEEP SMACKING PEOPLE, Clary. They'll eventually find your hypocrisy to be truth." 4 comments
01/08/2012 page 199
57.0% "This isn't even remotely exciting. There's so much talking that I don't even care."
01/08/2012 page 202
58.0% "The hell? Why is 'dumpster' capitalized? It's a DUMPSTER." 3 comments
01/13/2012 page 210
59.0% "OH MY GOD STOP TALKING ABOUT WHAT'S HAPPENING AND MAKE SOMETHING HAPPEN."
01/13/2012 page 210
59.0% "So...steles start motorcycles, too? Is there anything they can't do?"
01/26/2012 page 230
65.0% 3 comments
01/26/2012 page 230
65.0% ""Her face felt like one big bruise, her arms, aching and stinging, like raw meat." This may be because I've handled food, but when I touch raw meat, I don't get stung by it. Clare could have simply said 'Clary's face felt raw' and I would've gotten it. What is on this page just seems silly." 4 comments
01/26/2012 page 235
67.0% ""She could see how she was hurting him, and it made her glad." BUT WHYYYY. What did Alec do to you at all that hurt YOU, Clary?"
01/26/2012 page 235
67.0% "Point for Alec. You totally deserved that, Clary."
01/26/2012 page 246
70.0% ""The apple tasted green and cool." HOW DO YOU TASTE A COLOR? Apples aren't Skittles, you know!"
01/26/2012 page 249
71.0% "*headdesk* If the pale gold pollen is as light as talcum POWDER (not just talcum as it is written), it would be not be gold. It'd be white, silver, or greenish."
01/26/2012 page 252
71.0% "WOW, Jace, you're SUCH an ass. SUCH A HUGE BUTT WITH A FACE."
01/26/2012 page 267
76.0% ""You know," Clary said, "most psychologists agree that hostility is really just sublimated sexual attraction." I now see the appeal to Jace/Simon."
01/26/2012 page 268
76.0% ""They're in the upstairs apartment. My guess is that they won't bother us unless we try to get in." You JUST said that. No more than half a page ago.."
01/26/2012 page 269
76.0% "Dorothea's eyebrows shot skyward. I just imagined Dorothea's eyebrow's shooting from her face and going skyward. Now I am laughing."
01/26/2012 page 272
77.0% "Finally know what the Mortal Cup is all about. Finally."
01/26/2012 page 278
79.0% ""Simon. She had forgotten he was outside, had almost forgotten he existed." Why does Simon love Clary again?"
01/26/2012 page 290
82.0% "Welp, there goes Jace. Now rally up your buddies, Clary and go save him." 1 comment
01/26/2012 page 312
88.0% "Clare, you and your similes need to STOP. Image and video hosting by TinyPic"
01/26/2012 page 312
88.0% ""Clary," he said firmly. "This is my father." The plot thickens. Image and video hosting by TinyPic"
01/26/2012 page 335
95.0% "STOP TELLING ME HOW PEOPLE WERE ACTING AND SHOW ME, CLARE. SHOW me. Show me Jace's tension, don't just SAY that it's like a downed electrical wire, cause I'll just see Jace shooting sparks out of his mouth and writhing on the floor."
01/26/2012 page 353
100.0% "DONE. DOOOOOOOONE." 4 comments
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Comments (showing 1-50 of 52) (52 new)


Steph Sinclair Must it? Must it?!


Laurel IT MUST, DEAR STEPHANIE. All I remember is that I found the ending to be craptastic. These reviews must be made! I will drill through these books and bring 'em down.


Choco Oh my god, poor Ghirardelli!
D:
These are the books I hate ze most! Torture!

BUT THEN OH MY GOD, I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE YOUR REVIEW.
:D


Steph Sinclair Look how fast Palice's frown turned upside down at your poor brain cells' expense. Lol.

I can't wait for those reviews too! :D


Laurel Palice just wants me dead or something I guess.

They'll be a hell of a lot of fun to do, that's for sure! >:D
I used to own City of Bones and Ashes, but I got about 100 pages into Ashes and just said, "Bahh this sux." Got rid of them along with my Twilight books. Yechh.


Jahlia ((thing 10 Evil 1)) @palice, they aren't that baaaaaaaaaaaad. *whispers* despite the fact that i spot several harry potter references, the fact that clary is a little bitch that has no control of her hand, the shadowhunters are all schmucks that care for almost nobody but themselves, and believe that just because they have angel blood it gives them the right to be angelic douchebags, I shamefully still love them.
*whistles* palice did you write a review for city of bones? *crosses fingers*


Choco BAHAHAH!
>:D


Choco Jahlia[the lovely abnix, thing 10] wrote: "@palice, they aren't that baaaaaaaaaaaad. *whispers* despite the fact that i spot several harry potter references, the fact that clary is a little bitch that has no control of her hand, the shadowh..."

City of Bones, City of Ashes, and City of Glass. I FINISHED THE ENTIRE SERIES and still do not like ANY of them. Sorry - just not my thing. Clare did not manage to impress me. :(


Jahlia ((thing 10 Evil 1)) @palice The fourth one pissed me off. There are going to be SIX BOOKS. And i understand why you didn't like them palice, and you can make it up to me by writing more hilarious damaging negetive reviews :)


message 10: by Choco (new) - rated it 1 star

Choco Jahlia[the lovely abnix, thing 10] wrote: "@palice The fourth one pissed me off. There are going to be SIX BOOKS. And i understand why you didn't like them palice, and you can make it up to me by writing more hilarious damaging negetive rev..."

Hmmm... maybe I'll read the 4th one someday... just to write a review...
*strokes fake beard*


Jahlia ((thing 10 Evil 1)) @palice, i wanted to bitchslap clare with my bitchslapping slim jim *taps hand with slim jim* for writing that SHIT. She took a four star(in my opinion) and turned it into a 3 star, BARELY. She had like 3 plots, and she screwed up potentially awesome scenes!


Synesthesia Why? There's so much ASSHOLERY with Jake.
Ugh. And it had some good ideas like the Brothers. I loved those guys.
But then there were so many ANNOYING THINGS.


message 13: by Choco (new) - rated it 1 star

Choco >:D


message 14: by Cory (last edited Dec 15, 2011 09:25PM) (new) - rated it 1 star

Cory Cillian wrote: "At the risk of getting blacklisted by many (see how many fucks I give) I must say I'm confused: according to your shelves, you already have an opinion of this, however, it also says "to-read"...so,..."

It's a re-read, Cillian. Palice and Ghirardelli have already read the book, but they plan to re-read it on the 19th so they can review it with fresh minds.


Laurel Cillian wrote: "At the risk of getting blacklisted by many (see how many fucks I give) I must say I'm confused: according to your shelves, you already have an opinion of this, however, it also says "to-read"...so,..."

I marked this again as to-read because I had it as 'read' before. I bought the book in 2008, read it, and incredibly disliked it. I donated the book because it was cluttering my space, but like a number of books before, I tend to forget what happens. So to respectfully counter you, I have indeed read this before.
I will be fair, though, and remove some of the shelves I have this on since technically I only really remember hating the ending, but there's no need to go at me as a person, Cillian. I thoroughly despise cliques because of school experiences, and I wouldn't call myself desperate for laughs, either. I like entertaining people, but if it's too overboard for you, I can oblige and tone it down.


message 16: by Choco (new) - rated it 1 star

Choco I don't see this picture as making fun of the author's appearance. It's a bit like a caricature, and it's meant to be funny. No matter what a person looks like, the cartoon isn't going to add or take away any beauty - it's just supposed to look silly. I honestly don't think it's as bad as when some people speak of violent ways to deal with an author.

Here's one of Stephen King:


Laurel And I respect your opinion, Cillian. Caricatures can be pretty tasteless, but personally I find them fun and good drawing practice. Caricatures exaggerate particular body parts. My opinions against her are not because she's hefty. In fact, I think she has a lovely face and a nice smile.
I don't have much else to say other than sorry that I struck a nerve with you.


message 18: by John (new) - rated it 1 star

John Egbert Palice wrote: "I don't see this picture as making fun of the author's appearance. It's a bit like a caricature, and it's meant to be funny. No matter what a person looks like, the cartoon isn't going to add or ta..."

Yeahhh...I mention wanting to punch Alexandra Adornetto in the face once. Or twice. (Aand I do.) And that is pretty awful to some, I know. (But...would it be better to not say I want to punch her in the face when I do?) My awfulness, I think, is far far worse on the scale than this...

To be honest, I found that the cross eyes and teeth were making fun of her more than the weight. I have family members that are big like that. It's not good or bad...it's what it is...why lie about it?


message 19: by Cory (new) - rated it 1 star

Cory To tell the truth, this could've easily been a caricature of Adele with a few changes. Caricatures aren't meant to flatter. They are what they are and they exaggerate appearance and don't tend to flatter anyone, even the most attractive women in the world.

As for the clique mentality... well, I do see how it could apply. But I hold no sympathy for lying plagiarizers, so while I understand your position Cillian, I can't support it. Besides, Clare is a big girl. She can handle it. I doubt that she feels like a bullied kid being mocked by the queen bees with her hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Now, none of my favorite books have ever been a target of such vast internet disdain, but that's probably because most of my favorite books simply don't have authors like CC.

Well, that's a lie. I like Ender's Shadow. OSC is possibly one of the biggest assholes ever. But, strange enough, that hasn't prevented him from writing a decent book IMO. I have, however, thought about doing a re-read of Ender's Game to write a lengthy review on the thoughts that I've marinated on since I read it in middle school about seven or six years ago.


Laurel Cillian wrote: "We agree to disagree and it's fine; as I said, GR has not been a pleasant place lately, due to these kind of things, and I kept it nice and polite for as long as I could stand it. As a matter of fa..."

Thanks for the apology. I was going too far out of my way to go at this series, and I apologize for taking it too far. What will be placed here is a fair, honest review.
I still love you, Cillian, and respect you and I don't like having bad air in my friendships. :( And there is certainly something we can agree on...
Lisa Mantchev's EYES LIKE STARS!


message 21: by Choco (last edited Dec 15, 2011 10:24PM) (new) - rated it 1 star

Choco Mello wrote: "Yeahhh...I mention wanting to punch Alexandra Adornetto in the face once. Or twice. (Aand I do.) And that is pretty awful to some, I know. (But...would it be better to not say I want to punch her in the face when I do?) My awfulness, I think, is far far worse on the scale than this..."

Mello, I understand people can get frustrated while reading a book, and I do too. I'm sure I've said a lot of things about wanting to punch or smash... certain characters' or people's faces. What I said there wasn't really about anyone on GR that I know, but some other review I had read outside of GR. It just makes me sad that someone would write about such violent acts against a human being, just because of dislike. Like what Rebecca Black sometimes gets. It's really depressing.

Caricatures can look much more ridiculous than the one up there. I don't know... maybe it's just an artist's way of seeing things? I think it's perfectly innocent, it's meant to look funny. You see it, you laugh at it, and that's it.


message 22: by Cory (new) - rated it 1 star

Cory Eh, I don't really care what people like as long as they aren't insisting that I like it as well, or accept their word as that of god. I respect that you like these books. I don't know why, and, to tell the truth, I don't care. That's where it ends for me.

What pisses me off is when people (not you) get up in arms, defending this as a great original piece of fiction (the best, mind you), and Jace as the ultimate boyfriend to end all boyfriends. I think those fans are truly delusional.

I don't think it's necessary to dogpile a book. In fact, I tried to read this way before I even knew about the plagiarism stuff or anything involving GR. I just didn't like it. I found it utterly boring and I hated Jace.

But, I dunno. I haven't read a book to hate it. I think I'm about one of the only people who can say that. I read all of the big PNR (besides Halo and Angel Star, which I have no desire to ever read) before I started to use my GR account.

So, to sum up whatever the hell I'm trying to say -- I don't really care if you like these books. But it bothers me when they get listed as the best Urban Fantasy, or the best romantic couple, or the best writing, or the best anything really, because, setting emotional shit aside, it isn't that hard to prove that they aren't the best anything. I mean, I guess a lot of it is subjective, but when it comes to the actual writing, it's abhorrent.

I dunno. I don't fault people for liking what they like. And I try not to judge people for liking weird things. I mean, my friends like Twilight. I hate it. No, I don't hate it. I just really dislike it.

When it comes down to it, it's way too easy to judge an individual fan off of the entire fanbase. And a lot of us forget that sometimes. People I respect like Vampire Academy and Kody Keplinger's books, both of which I really, really dislike. I don't understand why. But I can begrudgingly accept that we're all different and move on because I don't care enough to linger on it forever.

Also, when you refer to that as clique behavior, I agree. But this? I don't. It reminds me of when everyone was jumping on Halo and Hades and the new Hush, Hush book. I don't understand why. And I will stop rambling because I'm tired and I seriously need some sleep after finals week.


Yasmin Oh my god, your reviews are flipping hilarious, bro.


message 24: by Choco (new) - rated it 1 star

Choco Awesome, awesome, awesome review.

Now... uh... mine's gonna be a bit late. I'm a horrible read along partner Aaand... I don't think I can draw myself that good!
D:


Laurel Palice wrote: "Awesome, awesome, awesome review.

Now... uh... mine's gonna be a bit late. I'm a horrible read along partner Aaand... I don't think I can draw myself that good!
D:"


I honestly don't think my caricature looks like me. XD.
But thanks Palice! You're a splendid read along partner what chu saying. Also, I still expect a lovely self portrait from you.


message 26: by Amber J. (new)

Amber J. I know Clare has been accused of "borrowing" ideas/dialogue/anything from TV, film, and other books, but I don't understand how the passages she stole from her own fanfiction count as plagiarism :/

And I literally laughed out loud when I read "Can they make me a chicken sandwich?"

After reading this I have a serious craving for Ghiradelli Dark Chocolate Raspberry Squares :)


Laurel Amber J. wrote: "I know Clare has been accused of "borrowing" ideas/dialogue/anything from TV, film, and other books, but I don't understand how the passages she stole from her own fanfiction count as plagiarism :/..."

Well she still took ideas from other novels for City of Bones. You can't exactly plagiarize yourself, but it's really weird to see it there though.
I'm glad you enjoyed the review, Amber! Get that chocolate!


message 28: by Choco (new) - rated it 1 star

Choco I look at it more like this:
Clare plagiarizes other books/movies for her fan fiction. Clare uses characters that are not her own. Clare decides to publish that fan fiction, changing the names of characters.

I still see it as plagiarism. She didn't come up with something that's entirely her own. Yeah, I should go and write my own review now.


message 29: by Amber J. (new)

Amber J. Palice wrote: "Clare plagiarizes other books/movies for her fan fiction. Clare uses characters that are not her own. Clare decides to publish that fan fiction, changing the names of characters...I still see it as plagiarism."

Okay, I see what you mean, yeah, that is true.


Jahlia ((thing 10 Evil 1)) Palice wrote: "I look at it more like this:
Clare plagiarizes other books/movies for her fan fiction. Clare uses characters that are not her own. Clare decides to publish that fan fiction, changing the names of c..."


OH palice! I can't wait for your review!


message 31: by Sen (new)

Sen such a detailed review! I haven't read this book yet, but I'll probably not give it a shot. Thank you for such magnificent, honest reviews as always, Ghirardelli! ^-^ LOL I think I've just become an obsessed follower of your reviews *Q*


Laurel Sᴀɴɴᴀ wrote: "such a detailed review! I haven't read this book yet, but I'll probably not give it a shot. Thank you for such magnificent, honest reviews as always, Ghirardelli! ^-^ LOL I think I've just become a..."

Oh thank you so much, Sanna! XD Reviews are always the best when they're honest.


Elisabeth (Enthralled by the Written Word) JUST finished reading this and all I could think was "what the actual fuck?" I enjoyed it simply because it's a perfect lesson on how not to write, especially when it comes to fantasy/paranormal. Great review!


Laurel Beth wrote: "JUST finished reading this and all I could think was "what the actual fuck?" I enjoyed it simply because it's a perfect lesson on how not to write, especially when it comes to fantasy/paranormal. G..."

Exactly! I guess if I had to like this book, that would also be my reasoning. Thank you so muchm, Beth! :)


Synesthesia mmm. Ghiradelli chocolate chips.

How about the simile-It was so hot outside it was like walking through her own circulatory system.


Laurel OH GOD THAT SIMILE. How do you...AETRGOSFHGLKAJD.
*fetal position*


Synesthesia dang. I was hoping that was a good one. *sulk*


message 38: by Laurel (last edited May 08, 2012 12:18PM) (new) - rated it 2 stars

Laurel Synesthesia wrote: "dang. I was hoping that was a good one. *sulk*"

You...you can't walk through the circulatory system! You'd be FLYING. The speed blood flows at...it goes around the earth two and a half times per MINUTE! NO ONE CAN WALK THAAAT. I CAN'T, Synesthesia!


Synesthesia OK. Maybe swimming through it. Sometimes it's really, really hot. Like body temperature hot, complete with humidity. I HATE THAT.

But that has to be less terrible than stinging like raw meat. HOW CAN RAW DEAD MEAT STING? AUGH!


Kazzy  Stallwood Your review had me in tears! (the good kind)

I've never wanted to read these books - I never liked her fanfiction, it was boring - plagiarism aside. I just, dunno. It seems forced and meh and just generic YA fantasy, romance, whatever the hell it's called nowadays.

Sorry Cassandra, but, you're just too meh for me!


message 41: by Josephina (new)

Josephina I stumbled onto this review by accident, since I was reading quotes in another section of this site and thought to myself, "Oh, this sounds vaguely familiar. Like it's a thinly veiled "homage" to something I've read before, only the original was done better. Oh...it's Cassandra Claire? Huh. I should've guessed. I wonder what people are saying about these books."

I don't know what other reviews are saying, but I just want to say, you cracked me up. I'm tempted to say, "You had me at hello," and "You complete me," but that would be OVERT plagarism. So, instead, I'll channel my inner Cassandra Claire and say, "You had me at...hi. And you bring me to completion."

Now I really want to continue on with an awful simile, like, "I'm racing to my "like" and "add friend" functions like...like...like a...teenage girl runs at the sight of the smell of...randy...teenage...boy? Okay, writing awful similes is hard work. I suddenly think you are seriously undervaluing the hard work Cassandra Claire put forth in compiling so many into one volume.


Laurel Kazzy wrote: "Your review had me in tears! (the good kind)

I've never wanted to read these books - I never liked her fanfiction, it was boring - plagiarism aside. I just, dunno. It seems forced and meh and just..."


I'm glad you liked the review! I almost want to read the fanfiction just to see the comparisons. :x

Josephina wrote: "I stumbled onto this review by accident, since I was reading quotes in another section of this site and thought to myself, "Oh, this sounds vaguely familiar. Like it's a thinly veiled "homage" to s..."

I just love this entire response. All of it! And you're right, I simply must be underestimating Clare's super-simile-sense. Similes are important, SO important that you need about two a page for 400 pages. I apologize for thinking of that aspect so lowly. :[


Hannah Williams This review said exactly what I was thinking. Except the fact that... HE WA HER BROTHER?!?!???!!! what the heck???? okay maybe it was kind of a turn from the regular boy meets girl, fall in love and save the world deal but.. really?!!!!??? and then at the end... they were just... okay with it??>?!!!! I mean they just rode off on a motorcycle together???? I was also quite bored with Jace... why was he love interest?? he's super rude! and that brings me to the fact that isabelle's brother (can't even remember his name.. what a stupid book) is in love with Jace!!!!! is it not completely obvious????? oh my god i can't believe i even read that.... but your review did wonders on my conscious.... other feel the same!!!!! at first i thought everyone loved the book and i was dying inside.


message 44: by Emily (new) - added it

Emily After constantly seeing this book everywhere I got the free sample on my nook...Thank god I didn't buy it! I didn't even finish the free sample. Nohting really intrigued me and I just didn't care. I got to where Simon invites her to the poetry thing or whatever and just gave up.


message 45: by Kat (new) - rated it 4 stars

Kat I can't believe it myself, but this is one of my favorite books.

Even though I agree with pretty much everything you said.

How does that make sense?!?!

I HATE Clary. I thought she was tolerable in the first book, but in the second book, she becomes a NIGHTMARE.

Isabelle is cool, I really don't have anything to say about her...

JACE. Jace is...... Interesting. He either annoys the hell out of me or I actually like him. I seriously can't decide.

The similes are insanely annoying. Some just make me say out loud... WHAT THE FNICKING HELL?! They don't even make sense! And there are some (like where Jace was being compared to a pumpkin whose guts had been scooped out) that were way more information than I needed to know!

But, I am unexplainably drawn to this series. *sigh* I hope that one day I'll figure out WHY.


message 46: by Jessie (new) - added it

Jessie Lol "The apple tasted green and cool." I am so not reading these books. Thanks for your sacrifice.


Synesthesia Have you even read these books and read Harry Potter and watched Star Wars?


Laurel Jeremy wrote: "yes i have read the first 4 books in this series and read the first 4 of harry potter and seen all ..."

Jeremy, I'm glad you enjoy this series. I, as you can see, do not and have explained my reasoning as to why. Now kindly step off your soapbox and proceed to like other reviews that share your opinion.


Laurel Jeremy wrote: "Laurel wrote: "Jeremy wrote: "yes i have read the first 4 books in this series and read the first 4 of harry potter and seen all ..."

Jeremy, I'm glad you enjoy this series. I, as you can see, do ..."


Oh I have! Happy reading to you too! :)


Rachel You know when I read this I didn't really get the connection to Harry Potter... I could sort of see it, but not enough that it bothered me.

Then I watched the movie. The whole time all I could think of was how this was totally Harry Potter all fanfictioned.


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