kari's Reviews > But I Love Him

But I Love Him by Amanda Grace
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's review
May 25, 11

bookshelves: 2011, ya
Read in May, 2011

A powerful story about domestic or dating abuse and how or why it happens.
The format of this book really works for the story being told. It begins with the ending and then rolls back through the relationship all the way to the beginning. I know the author has said she did it this way to stop readers from disconnecting to the story and I think it really works. If it was told simply chronologically there would be a point where you'd think Ann is stupid for staying or you'd think this is the moment when I would have walked away. But knowing that she didn't walk away, you're more open to seeing all the changes, all the hints of what's to come.
Also, I think it works because if you are in a very unhealthy/dangerous relationship, it is only at the end that you can truly look back and see where you could have or should have made another choice. While you're in the midst of the storm, it's hard to see where exactly you stepped into it instead of avoiding it.
As you get to look back at all these moments, it becomes clear that Ann made choices over and over that brought her to that point. Her home life adds to her need to be the center of someone's existence so she mistakes his overwhelming of her life for love and not control. As she slowly lets go of everything that isn't him, you see how she was led down the path she ended up on.
Connor is a well-developed character, not just an evil one-dimensional villain. There are nuances to him and reasons, albeit not excuses, for what he does. He knows he has problems, but he can't solve them or perhaps he hasn't actually seen that he is the problem now. You can feel what Ann feels for him, how much she wants to heal him, to give him everything he needs so he can let go of his rage.
It is so well-written that, like Ann, there will still be a small part of you that hopes she will give him another chance, even as you pray that she doesn't. I think that is the key to why this works so well. You really can understand and feel what Ann feels, knowing she's making mistakes and what they will eventually cost her.
I would have liked a bit more about her best friend, her family and Blake, the moment when she could have taken a different trail.
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Comments (showing 1-2)

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Erin (*is in a reviewing slump*) I havent read this book but I'd like to. Liking your review because it was extremely well-written and this caught my eye.

kari Thanks. It is a really well done story. I think you'll like it.

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