Science fiction is not my thing. So it was with some trepidation that I opened my book club choice for the month, ready to endure another Stars Wars inspired knock off. And most of the book I had my head set on 3 stars, writing my review in the back of my mind: sure the story was interesting because it's about the psychology of child manipulation but the battle games lost me, both in interest and sometimes even understanding. It's sci fi. I liked the filler but not the meat. But then I finished the book and had a change of heart.

In this story, earth is preparing for a third invasion from an alien planet by training children from infancy for battle. (Card named the aliens "buggers" which I wonder if he knew the profane use of the word elsewhere in the world or if he was playing off that definition.) Even though the book was written in the early age of computer technology and before internet, Card smartly realized its importance in the future. I was not disappointed with his vision of a crowded earth population run by government treaties and reliant on computer and science technology and internet networking. It still seems appropriate instead of dated.

It's written from the perspective of a 6-year-old boy unsure of whom he can trust when the other students hate him and the teachers use him. Most of the book you're watching this boy genius grow up, battle his inner demons as he struggles to differentiate himself from his cruel brother, somehow keep his kindness while training to be a killer, and figure out whether or not he wants to be the hope of the world. Is heroism worth the cost of these children's souls? Do the ends of a saved world justify the means of so many children losing their childhood?

And all that growing up is done in one battle stimulation after the next. I wasn't sure if it was truly long in the middle or if my patience wore thin because I have none for sci fi. But since the men testing Ender kept changing the rules and pushing him to his limits to see how he would react, even though the mass of the book is his training games it kept me turning pages wondering what would happen to Ender. He didn't trust the teachers so you know something was up they weren't disclosing.

The whole book heads toward one particular outcome, but near the end an alternate solution is presented. I wasn't sure how Card would end the battle without disappointing me. I didn't want to see Ender as a heartless killer, but I didn't want him to be gullible or soft either. I didn't want the ultimate message to be a cop out nor did I just want a Hollywood ending where the enemy is always just bad without value and earth saves the day at the last minute.

And what about the end of the war? When you've spent every waking and even sleeping hour preparing for a mission, what do you do with the rest of your life? There is nothing Ender could do that would give him back his life or even make him feel purposeful. Or so I thought. I was sure I would be disappointed with the end and yet I wasn't. In the end, Card gave me all of what I wanted. The mission Ender embarks upon at the end of the book almost justifies the emotional torture and certainly gives the side of Ender you want to see bloom a chance to heal his soul. It makes him a bigger hero than the mission thrust upon him does. It is because of the ending that I decided I really did like the book. A lot. And I am impressed with his imagination.

For those of you who have read here are some questions I wondered:

When Valentine states there could be worse men in power than Peter, I could not imagine who could be worse. All he cared about is power and would do anything to get it. He wanted to kill his brother when he was a boy of six. He tortured animals, a sign of a serial killer. What could be worse? I suppose stupidity? As long as he was given power he would take care of the world in order to maintain it, but what about the casualties he takes to get it?

The competition, to the point of murderous rage and jealousy, seemed over the top for me. Sure they are fighting for world glory, placed in a strange stimulus environment, and chosen for their genius and ability to fight, but the homogeneously violent children seemed apt on pulling down the superior like crabs in a bucket. Could children truly act so viciously toward one another? The saving grace is his toon leader who introduces the doubt of why they should play puppet to the school leaders or even play the games at all.

I can't conceive society humble enough to admit they needed the recklessness and empathy of children instead of leaving it to adult maturity. The trick aspect of the battles since children are easy to mold and manipulate saved me from being entirely against their methods. But I don't think they needed to completely alienate Ender for him to succeed. Play on his empathy; make him want to succeed to please. Don't destroy all that is good in the boy to use him and then leave him purposeless in life.

The self-defense murders bothered me. I know he was cornered and wanted to protect himself from further attacks and he didn't understand the extent of the pain he caused, but I still felt a truly compassionate child would not have it in him to hurt someone that badly. I wasn't sure how to feel about it.

I didn't buy the aliens not understanding there was intelligent life on earth because we don't dream each other's dreams, particularly since they are supposed to be quick learners. Mankind discovered their presence pre-attack and organized a defensive fleet. How can that not be intelligent? If there were only one attack I could buy into it, but not with two. I guess it goes back to your definition of intelligence.

My biggest complaint: I didn't understand the little doctor destroying everything but the recreation of the game surviving. We watch the planet disintegrate and resemble into an unidentifiable mass but this whole layout survives intact? Despite the technicalities, I did appreciate Ender's opportunity for redemption, to do what he thought ethical for the alien planet. Him going in as a peace mediator and stopping the third invasion would have left the story flat, where this way he realistically couldn't get out of being used as a military hero, but still got to find his own solution for coexistence, use his brilliance and empathy for his true mission in life.

Maybe it's hypocritical of me to not understand a major plot progression and not let it bother my enjoyment of the story, but a) I really wanted that ending and b) more importantly felt it could have been plausible somehow that I'm not seeing. So I'm willing to overlook this detail, or if not overlook at least not get hung up on it. So even though I was confused by the ruins left for Ender and not entirely reeled in by the battles, the story pulled me in and I enjoyed the overall message. It's the best science fiction I've ever read. Well technically it's the only, but who's counting?