Beckie's Reviews > Safe in the Arms of God: Truth from Heaven About the Death of a Child

Safe in the Arms of God by John F. MacArthur Jr.
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Feb 11, 2011

it was amazing
bookshelves: psychology, relationships, self-help, religion, favorites
Read in August, 2010

I'm probably going to have to read this book a few more times before I can give a full review of it but in short, my boyfriend lent it to me because he thought it might be helpful regarding a miscarriage I had that resulted from rape.

I still don't know if I'm able to write completely openly about this book but one thing I can say for sure is that it changed my entire world and entire view on a "thing called it" that was a "rape baby" God was gracious enough to spare from having to live in this world and showed me that "it" was actually a child, a daughter of God just like me, just as beloved and just as valuable and her name was Grace. And it was okay to call "it" a "her" and a "mine" and a "baby" and a "Gracie" and most of all, it's okay to hate what happened, feel relief for the odd grace of a miscarriage in my situation, but still feel validated in feeling a sense of loss, grief, sadness and pain in the full acknowledgment that, despite not wanting to be pregnant, not wanting to have a baby, not feeling sad at the time of the loss, GOD created her and HE still loves her and no matter what anyone says about how things came or went, I AM a mother, I HAVE a child and I have absolutely every right on earth and heaven above to call myself a mother and love my child even if I'm still grateful for the way things worked out. And even though being grateful for the way things happened, I'm still allowed to feel sadness that I *don't* have a little girl running around my house. They are incredibly contradicting feelings I've struggled with for years but I felt like this book really allowed me to feel vindicated and justified for all my feelings and more than anything else, it emphasized to me that Love is Love no matter what context surrounds. God loved Lucifer more than anything else and he became evil. Did it not break God's heart and fill him with contradictory feelings too?

This is an incredibly difficult and sensitive subject for me to talk about, let alone write about and I didn't realize how much I'd bottled up, compartmentalized, denied and intentionally overlooked until I read this book. It sat me down face to face with the truth. A year after reading this, I'm still trying to recover from what it uncovered. I think that's what makes it such a good book. Every page was fill with pain and tears and anger and shame and sadness and guilt and more anger and more tears and sometimes, a bit of humiliation. But each page was also drenched in God's love. And the immense love of an author who desperately wants others to understand how much God loves them and their babies, no mater what the story is.
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