Kinga's Reviews > Carolina Moon
Carolina Moon
by Nora Roberts
by Nora Roberts
Kinga's review
bookshelves: l-o-v-e, paranormal, jeez-louise, fluff
Oct 30, 12
bookshelves: l-o-v-e, paranormal, jeez-louise, fluff
Read from February 10 to May 31, 2011
This book was so bad and made me so angry that I wasn't going to write a review but my OCD is stronger than me, also, I need to vent somewhere.
First, let's make one thing clear. I don't hate cheesy popular literature. Oh no, no. I embrace trash. I suspend my disbelief when needed, I swallow cliches like they were milk and honey, I even put up with bad writing. All that, so I can be entertained.
When I have gone so far in sacrificing my delicate literary sensibilities and you, in turn, have failed to entertain me, then we have fury like there has never been fury before.
In the beginning of 2011 I had this brilliant idea that I would download an easy, exciting audiobook and listen to that while I sweat on the treadmill. This idea, while great in theory, didn't quite work out (ha, ha, work out! get it?), because the book I chose for my experiment was this wretched pile of muck.
Well, it has mystery, murder, rape, romance, a character with paranormal abilities... Surely, if anything, it'll be entertaining...
Let me put this way: The bits about organic farming were the most exciting out of the whole book.
Roberts' attempt at a crime/mystery story was just laughable. I mean, NOTHING happened. There were no clues here and there, no trying to solve the mystery, no progress. Basically, they didn't know who did it for the whole book. And then on the last 5 pages they found out who did it.
So you would think, ok, the focus is on romance.
Sadly, the hero was an idiot who decided to win the heroine by showing up at her house and nagging her constantly until she said yes. And of course she did say yes, as she was an idiot herself.
There was no conflict, no build up, no tension, no release. It went pretty much like this:
He: Be with me
She: No
He: Why not?
She: Uh, I don't know
He: So be with me
She: Ok
He: I love you
She: I love you too, let's get married
He: Cool.
There was as much chemistry between them as there is between pieces of furniture.
On top of that, the book was just one big cliche. Everything was cliche, every character (including all the bland secondary characters), every scene, every description, every 'plot twist' (the expression 'plot twist' is a bit of an overstatement when it comes to this book). And I know I said I don't mind cliches and that they are like milk and honey. But come on! That was as if someone asked me to eat a barrel of honey straight from the hive.
It probably didn't help that I had all those cliches spoken softly in a monotonous voice straight into my ear.
I cared so little for anyone or anything this book that if the insane murderer that they were looking for, had killed just about everyone, it would've been alright with me.
And I had to suffer through it each time I went to the gym. Because I am simply crazy and I can't not finish a book.
This review is a total mess. I am sorry. I am so very angry. I want this book to die.
First, let's make one thing clear. I don't hate cheesy popular literature. Oh no, no. I embrace trash. I suspend my disbelief when needed, I swallow cliches like they were milk and honey, I even put up with bad writing. All that, so I can be entertained.
When I have gone so far in sacrificing my delicate literary sensibilities and you, in turn, have failed to entertain me, then we have fury like there has never been fury before.
In the beginning of 2011 I had this brilliant idea that I would download an easy, exciting audiobook and listen to that while I sweat on the treadmill. This idea, while great in theory, didn't quite work out (ha, ha, work out! get it?), because the book I chose for my experiment was this wretched pile of muck.
Well, it has mystery, murder, rape, romance, a character with paranormal abilities... Surely, if anything, it'll be entertaining...
Let me put this way: The bits about organic farming were the most exciting out of the whole book.
Roberts' attempt at a crime/mystery story was just laughable. I mean, NOTHING happened. There were no clues here and there, no trying to solve the mystery, no progress. Basically, they didn't know who did it for the whole book. And then on the last 5 pages they found out who did it.
So you would think, ok, the focus is on romance.
Sadly, the hero was an idiot who decided to win the heroine by showing up at her house and nagging her constantly until she said yes. And of course she did say yes, as she was an idiot herself.
There was no conflict, no build up, no tension, no release. It went pretty much like this:
He: Be with me
She: No
He: Why not?
She: Uh, I don't know
He: So be with me
She: Ok
He: I love you
She: I love you too, let's get married
He: Cool.
There was as much chemistry between them as there is between pieces of furniture.
On top of that, the book was just one big cliche. Everything was cliche, every character (including all the bland secondary characters), every scene, every description, every 'plot twist' (the expression 'plot twist' is a bit of an overstatement when it comes to this book). And I know I said I don't mind cliches and that they are like milk and honey. But come on! That was as if someone asked me to eat a barrel of honey straight from the hive.
It probably didn't help that I had all those cliches spoken softly in a monotonous voice straight into my ear.
I cared so little for anyone or anything this book that if the insane murderer that they were looking for, had killed just about everyone, it would've been alright with me.
And I had to suffer through it each time I went to the gym. Because I am simply crazy and I can't not finish a book.
This review is a total mess. I am sorry. I am so very angry. I want this book to die.
Sign into Goodreads to see if any of your friends have read Carolina Moon.
sign in »
Reading Progress
| 02/10/2011 |
|
10.0% | "I have a good reason for this. I swear. Just wait for it. I will be finished in about 4 months." | |
| 02/24/2011 |
|
33.0% | "I can't believe I have gone through 1/3 of this book and nothing's happened" | |
| 05/31/2011 |
|
100.0% | "This was an absolute piece of shit. I am not sure I am even going to review it." 1 comment |
Comments (showing 1-20 of 20) (20 new)
date
newest »
newest »
message 1:
by
Miriam
(new)
Feb 23, 2011 02:42pm
My sympathies.
reply
|
flag
*
Kinga, I didn't hate it as much as you did, but when I see the 4-star reviews (including from friends of mine) I wonder if we read the same book. Definitely among Roberts' poorer novels.
I think I hated it more because I had to LISTEN to it while running 5 miles. It definitely did nothing to improve the experience.
Audio is not a method of book delivery that works well for me. I'm too visual a learner -- I have to SEE the book.
Because I am simply crazy and I can't not finish a book.I've often said leaving a book unfinished is a moral weakness.
this is sooo funny!"There was as much chemistry between them as there is between pieces of furniture."
lol...lord. thanks for the laugh!
i'm not a big nora roberts fan, but i do love johanna lindsey, julia quinn, and julie garwood for chessy historical romance; maybe, you should give them a gander while you sweat off fat cells
I read 1 Julia Quinn and I enjoyed it!You can check my review for Duke And I.
I will definitely go in that direction next time!
defintely go for the 'malory series' with johanna lindsey, try to go in order, it's better that wayand the 'bridgeton series' with julia quinn
Hilarious, best review I've read in ages! I promise that Nora does have some good books, try Naked in Death.
I thought the worst part was the way she writes dialogue. No man talks like that.... and no man says things like Cade says before they have sex. Or otherwise for that matter.
I've read a few of Nora Roberts' books, and I'm not a huge fan. But my mom is, so I'm here looking up books for her and came across your review. All I have to say is LULZ! "He: Be with me
She: No
He: Why not?
She: Uh, I don't know
He: So be with me
She: Ok
He: I love you
She: I love you too, let's get married
He: Cool."
BAHAHAHAHAHA! I've read books with "romances" like this! It's pathetic. Ah, thanks for the laugh:) I'll keep this one away from Mom's Kindle.
You obviously do think yourself above so called "cheesey popular literature." This was actually brilliant and had many passages as great as any great literature. You just want to snob it because it's by Nora Roberts despite all her talent you want to deried her for being popular. There was so much in this book that was brilliant.
No, I obviously don't think myself above 'cheesy popular literature'. Feel free to check my reviews for Sherry Thomas for example, or many other romance authors I love. Nora Roberts might have written a few good books at some point but once you start churning out about 8-10 books a year, the quality suffers. It is obvious. Even the most talented writer can't possibly write 300 amazing books. At that rate you're just manufacturing them.
I actually explained what I didn't like about that book. It failed as a romance novel on all levels.
You just said it was brilliant and that's that.
Your standards are obviously lower than mine and good for you. My favourite romance writer - Sherry Thomas, carefully writes maybe one book a year, maybe one and a half. She's written about nine.
Your favourite writer has written 300. As I said, good for you, you can read them until you die.
If you would like to read something brilliant on about the same reading level I'd suggest anything by Shannon Hale. Wonderful author of kids lit.
Wonderful review, Kinga! And speaking of ♥Sherry♥ Thomas I just got an ARC of her YA fantasy The Burning Sky. :)
LMAO Kinga. And, oh honey -- (the whole stwicky barrel of it) -- I feel your pain. Btw, I almost never listen to romances on audio, because the clichés and corny lines sound 10x worse, and you can't skim past them. As for Nora Roberts, I may have read one or two years ago, but she's gone pulp.

