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The Bargain Bride by Barbara Metzger
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's review
Jan 23, 2011

did not like it
Read in January, 2011

Bleurgh. Remembering that Metzger was a more old-fashioned Heyer copyist, and that her books might be a bit boring and empty but potentially contain some love and affection, I came looking for romance - and found the usual tedious fuck fest. It was harder than studying fiscal economics formulas to finish this thing, even trying to skim endless inner monologues about nothing.

With a gay valet and a fainting dog around, it makes no sense not to use them, but she has nothing to do for them except be a brief tee-hee mention. She wastes 300 unbearably boring pages on utter nothingness, dragging out a non-quarrel through four chapters, straining to find a single reason why the beautiful rich young people should have a problem - there she has to use Heyer again, unable to think of a plot herself, but Grand Sophy rotates in her grave at the sight of this girl retrieving gaming debts. It's gobsmacking but true that she can neither show why her characters should love each other, nor show why they might think the opposite.

Just like William Burroughs said that his Naked Lunch would repell youngsters rather than make them have (more) sex, these novels have turned me into an asexual.
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02/04/2016 marked as: read

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