Chris's Reviews > Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone by J.K. Rowling
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's review
Feb 09, 2008

really liked it
bookshelves: fantasy, harry-potter
Read in July, 2007

Since pretty much everyone I know has read these books, I figure reviewing them is pretty pointless. But with the new book coming out in a couple of weeks, I have to go through them beginning to end. To make the reviews more entertaining, I will be doing them in a variety of unexpected formats. For this review, I will be writing as someone incapable of suspending his disbelief.

This book was terrible! I mean, this author is obviously on drugs or insane or something like that, and why she has been allowed to publish such patent nonsense is beyond me. What is even more horrifying is that so many people, adults and children, are supporting this madwoman. I mean, even some of my friends and family, people I respect have come under her spell!

Her spell. Ha! As though such things as spells and magic really exist. I know she and her hoard of followers believe so, but we, the right-thinking, rational people of the world know better, don't we?

The beginning was okay, and I had high hopes for it. I thought it might be an interesting story about this family, the Dursleys, who seem to be people after my own heart. Sensible, no-nonsense folk, these, who know what's real and what isn't. But within ten pages, I knew something wasn't right. Think about this - some crazy old man in robes shows up with a tiny device that can put out streetlights from a distance? A cat changes into a woman? Outrageous! And then the flying motorcycle, and nonsensical ravings about magicians and dark lords and curses, and that's where it all started to go downhill.

I forced myself to slog through this mess of nonsense, though by the time I got to chapter five, I had pretty much given up. Nothing this book describes could possibly take place in the real world, and it is almost criminal that she should get this kind of fame and attention. She is a font of nonsense and mayhem, poisoning the minds of everyone her work touches. If you haven't read these books, I recommend that you stay away from them. If you have, then I beg you to come to your senses and embrace the real world. Give up this madness and join us over here in the world where truth is truth and Harry Potter is meaningless vapor.
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Reading Progress

03/09 marked as: read

Comments <span class="smallText"> (showing 1-15 of 15) </span> <span class="smallText">(15 new)</span>

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Becky Brilliant review. And so true! Did you know that there are six more books after this one?? Her publisher must be just as insane as she is!

;)


Kris Sarcasm at its best!


message 3: by Nicole (last edited Jul 15, 2009 10:24AM) (new) - rated it 5 stars

Nicole Of course it's not realistic! That is the reason why it is called fiction. I happen to have read and absolutely loved the series! But does that mean I believe in wizards and magic and stuff? No, of course not! Now, please don't take this the wrong way. It's just that your review totally went against everything I think about the series. But why are you thinking about whether or not it could happen in real life? If it could, it wouldn't be as much fun to read! But, as I said before please do not take this personally, I just think it's a shame that you won't even give the rest of the books a chance



Chris nikki wrote: "Of course it's not realistic! That is the reason why it is called fiction. I happen to have read and absolutely loved the series! But does that mean I believe in wizards and magic and stuff? No, of..."

There must be something in the water - you're the second person this week to comment like this. So I'll say what I said to the other person: Take a deep breath, re-read the bit in italics, and then go to Wikipedia and look up "sarcasm." You may be enlightened.


Nicole Oh, srry. I didn't really pay attention to the italics.


Chris Consider this a learning experience, then. *smile*


message 7: by Yas (new) - rated it 5 stars

Yas Why have you given it 4 stars then?


Rachel Weighell How dare she try and poison our minds! The swine.


message 9: by Nancy (last edited Nov 26, 2010 10:30PM) (new) - rated it 5 stars

Nancy She is not swine, it is just a story for children.
This means things like Twilight and that stuff are rubbish. Although Twilight is.


Blues For Eden Jeez. Didn't you people read the thing in italics? The guy was being sarcastic!


message 11: by Jennifer (new) - added it

Jennifer Stone harry potter is a book. of course everyone knows it's not real. if you don't like you don't have to write anything about it. To tell u the truth YOU are the mad woman. If you don't know the meaning of FANTASY, you'd better look it up. It means NOT REAL. this book is in the Section of Fiction/Fantasy. It is certainly not in the section of REALITY you Baffon.Plus, Harry Potter is one of the world's most adored books. Is Sherlock Holmes real? No i don't think so. Is twilight real. It is not real too. So why do you think they were all allowed to publish those books? This because they are interesting. You don't know how much people love to read these types of books. So if you want to write negative 'bout books, you'd better chose any otheer books. reading about smething that isn't real only gives you the thrill. Do you think Goosebumps is real? Definatly not. it is the same with harry potter. if you don't like it you don't need to write a bad review about the book. think 'bout how the author feels. even if you are doing this sarcastically. most of the people are wanting for an eighth book of these series. even I'm creating a fiction book too. and if you don't like to go on adventures, you'd better not read fiction/fantasy books. that's my advice. if you're not willing to follow it, you'll be writing negative remarks and people who like those books will be ticking you off like I'm doing right now. HP is THE BEST


Adelaide Metzger i love your profile pic


 ~Geektastic~ I thought this site was for readers... Apparently quite a few of your "critics" are skimmers with a blind spot for italics :). Cute review, I like that you branched out for a little fun.


message 14: by E.E. (new) - rated it 5 stars

E.E. Loved the sarcasm. For a second I thought you were for real and I was about to literally blast you.


Slyfox98 Hahaha very funny. Maybe the moral of the story is to have an imagination? Honestly, the story is about FRIENDSHIP and I written in a fantastic matter of creativity. Also, it is a children's book, and most adults do not understand things like believing in magic.


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