Karla's Reviews > Paradise Wild

Paradise Wild by Johanna Lindsey
Rate this book
Clear rating

by
2846441
I really can't stir up any enthusiasm or interest to write a review for this one. The characters were idiots and constantly swung from hatred, to deliberate misunderstandings, to convenient temper tantrums/snark, to giggling and frolicking like seals off the Hawaiian coast. The heroine, Corinne, was most annoying of all. She's a complete spoiled brat who's been allowed to get away with murder. Combine that with a tendency towards reckless TSTLity (getting locked in a tool shed because she thinks there are puppies in there, f'rinstance), and she made finishing this book a real chore. Usually when either the hero or heroine suck, the other redeems it somewhat. Nope. Both of them are idiots and while Jared is very troglodalpha with the damning and cursing of his wife - who he hates and distrusts and derides, yet still can't help but want to bone repeatedly - he was boring/annoying too. In short, I didn't care about either of them, and they could have tossed themselves into a volcano for all I cared.

Apart from infodumps about Hawaiian history and culture and references to the simmering coup against the Queen, this really didn't read like a historical (and all those lessons would have been in a bad contemporary, too). It could have taken place in the 70s or 80s, for all the old timey feel it had. In fact, Corrine seemed to keep forgetting that Hawaii was, legally, a foreign country and not the 50th state. She kept saying and doing stupid shit over and over, only to be reminded (over and over) that Hawaii isn't the US and therefore the law is different there. As for the dialogue/interactions/plot, it often read like a Harlequin or something else contemporary.

The book didn't engender any hate and loathing like some other 1 and 2 star reads, but more of an apathy/mild irritant. I kept wondering just how much longer Lindsey could prolong the inanity and lo, she managed to do it for pages upon pages. Big ol' yawn.

One of these days I'm going to have to admit that Lindsey's style simply isn't for me. It's too simple, the characters have little depth beyond being at contrived loggerheads ad nauseum, and the story is usually as flat as a supermodel's chest.

Speaking of chests, what was with the heroine's breast milk being a plot device? I got so tired of reading about how her tits ached. So much of the early post-arrival-in-Hawaii bickering crap between Corrinne and Jared was prompted by her tits aching or leaking and trying to keep said tits away from his scrutiny because she doesn't want him to know she's popped his sprog. This book will forever be "The Leaky Tit Romance."

Well, I guess I did go ahead and write a review. Such as it is.
12 likes · likeflag

Sign into Goodreads to see if any of your friends have read Paradise Wild.
sign in »

Reading Progress

01/25/2011 page 62
16.0% ""And I will stop [gambling], just as soon as I can play in that one no-limit game I've been dreaming about for so long." Our heroine's a right-aspiring little Maverick. (Psst, I like Bart better. :P) " 1 comment
02/01/2011 page 94
24.0% ""Don't get me angry," he said in a deadly voice. "I can be very cruel when I'm angry." " 2 comments
02/04/2011 page 119
30.0% "An unseen gunman takes a potshot at our hero and peels away in a coach. The image is hilarious, for some reason. :D" 7 comments
02/07/2011 page 147
37.0% ""I had never done anything to him to deserve what he did to me. He believes in vengeance. Well, he has made a believer out of me, a wholehearted believer.""
02/07/2011 page 169
42.0% "Of course our hate-filled, baby-hating heroine does a 180 once the sprog pops out..."
02/10/2011 page 188
47.0% "This is reading like a Harley with a billionaire tycoon having it out with an unwilling virgin stable bride. Only thing that makes it "historical" is one mention of Hawaii's queen."
02/10/2011 page 207
52.0% "h squeezes out her breast milk so the H won't know she's been pregnant. A rather interesting moment in a very blah historical (that might as well be a contemporary)." 1 comment
02/22/2011 page 306
77.0% ""Would they never believe each other about anything?" --No. No, you won't. Ever. It's been 280 pages (at least) of deliberate lying and disbelief. Keep it up. I don't mind. Honestly. >:-\" 3 comments
show 1 hidden update…

Comments (showing 1-25 of 25) (25 new)

dateDown arrow    newest »

message 1: by LuvGirl (new) - added it

LuvGirl Nice! I have this one. I want your take on it before I read it :-)


Karla I'm hoping to get to it real soon. Out of all of JL's early stuff, I want to read this one most.


Karla Well, I left The Movie Set home, but I had brought my ereader in with me to update it, and so things worked out...


message 4: by LuvGirl (new) - added it

LuvGirl How ya liking this so far?


Karla Eh, it's ok. Haven't really gotten into it enough yet to tell.


message 6: by Misfit (new)

Misfit I like that shelf, heroine annoying and way annoying.


Karla And this one almost broke the meter.


Karla And how could I have forgotten to include the stuff about her leaky boobs? The things I forget when I write a review... Phew, amended it.


Karla Yeah, one of these days I might purge my shelves of her too! I AM going to move her into the basement. She's taking up valuable space upstairs where I could put an author that I might like better or know I like - like Shirlee Busbee.


message 10: by Misfit (new)

Misfit I think I've read one Johanna Lindsey. Haven't wanted to go back anytime soon.


message 11: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla That puppies-shed part was too much. So she proceeds ahead of the guy into a dark and dusty old shed. The door gets slammed behind her. BOOM! She beats on the door. No answer.
She searched in and around the empty crates, but could find no tools. She did discover one thing though. There were no puppies in this shed.

Maybe it's the way that was written, but I LOL'd. I could almost imagine her saying, "But...but....where are the puppies? He lied about the puppies!"


message 12: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla You have no idea. Not even fun-bad. Boring-bad. With mild little spikes of WTF-is-this-omg-ha-ha like the PUPPIES!


message 13: by Kerrie (new)

Kerrie The puppies scene screams MST3K!!!

(Heroine enters shed.)
SERVO: Puppies!!!... Puppies???
(Door shuts, and lock clicks.)
MIKE: But there were no puppies in this shed.


message 14: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla "Don't let this happen to you."


message 15: by Sarah (new)

Sarah It's too simple, the characters have little depth beyond being at contrived loggerheads ad nauseum, and the story is usually as flat as a supermodel's chest.

The characters were idiots and constantly swung from hatred, to deliberate misunderstandings, to convenient temper tantrums/snark, to giggling and frolicking like seals off the Hawaiian coast. The heroine, Corinne, was most annoying of all. She's a complete spoiled brat who's been allowed to get away with murder.

....Gosh, this sounds AWFULLY familiar.... *thinks hard*


message 16: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla OMG, you're right! O__O


message 17: by Sarah (new)

Sarah How has this author become so beloved & famous?


message 18: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla Lack of options back in the 70s? Though that doesn't hold water IMO because there were plenty of others, as my collection attests. :P


message 19: by Sarah (new)

Sarah Maybe it's something akin to "the emperor's got no clothes." Everyone says they love her because they think everyone else does & therefore it must be their oddness.


message 20: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla Could be a case of groupthink fostered by rose-colored nostalgia. :P


message 21: by Sarah (new)

Sarah Very likely. :P Who likes admitting their taste sucked when they were younger? Heh.


message 22: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla My tastes were atrocious and my writing ability even worse. I do like to think I've improved, and at least like crap in an ironic way. LOL


message 23: by Sarah (new)

Sarah I still like the first poem I ever wrote, so maybe that says something? :D I never write poems anymore, though. Heh.


message 24: by JadedlilFecker (new)

JadedlilFecker Leaky Tit Romance, LOL!! The Leaky Tit Romance Book #2: Tender Fury Read it to find out, ladies.


Rofl


message 25: by Susan (new)

Susan She popped his sprog? LOL. I choked on some beer, you bitch.


back to top