Jess the Romanceaholic's Reviews > Torn

Torn by K.D. King
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This ebook was provided to me at no cost by the publisher.

From the moment I read the blurb about this story I was intrigued. The idea of phsyically knowing without a doubt the identity of your "fated mate" greatly appeals to me. I also thoroughly enjoyed the "starcrossed lovers" aspect of it, with Anaria and Kalil being on opposing sides of a multigenerational war.

What worked for me:
*I am a huge fan of both "fated-to-be-mated" stories and the "enemies to lovers" concept. Throw into it a touch of kidnapping, prejudice, sabotage, and a thirst for vengeance, and you've got the ingredients for an intriguing story.

*I enjoyed the twisty "secret" that completely rocked Anaria's world. I did figure it out fairly early on, as I think was the author's intention, though I admit the names of the different worlds did get confusing on occasion so I did go recheck them against the prologue as the story progressed.

*I also enjoyed Kalil's psychic friend, Lyon, though I was disappointed that he didn't have a larger role in the story. I would hope for a sequel starring Lyon, but being described as seven feet tall might make it a bit difficult to cast him as a hero in a future story.

What didn't work for me:
*The writing was quite choppy. There simply wasn't a lot of flow between the sentences. For example: Kalil awoke alone. His body did not glow. Anaria was nowhere in the vicinity. He had a sinking feeling. A simple rewrite would make it all flow together better, such as Kalil awoke alone. His body was not glowing, indicating that Anaria was nowhere in the vicinity. With a sinking feeling, he... and segue into the next action or something.

*I'm not really sure I was feeling the chemistry between Anaria and Kalil. She went from hating him to wanting him to kind of hitting on him to being ready to destroy the ship they were on to screwing him in the supply closet, followed shortly by an experiment in light BDSM.

Plus, there was the whole "forced to be naked in front of other people thing" or the wedding orgy, both of which are SO not my kink, so that was a bit of a put-off as well. To be perfectly fair though, I'm biased against that sort of thing in erotica unless the female happens to enjoy her public nudity (and preferably knows this predilection ahead of time). I also think this is an inherent downfall in novellas; when a story is shorter than novel length, there simply isn't as much time to build as great a depth and chemistry in the major characters as one might hope for.

*I was also a wee bit confused as to why the secret needed to be kept a secret to begin with. Perhaps it was simply a matter of one side of the war not yet being strong enough to really do anything about it, but I still can't help but feel that had they revealed their secret earlier, some of the neutral worlds might have taken their side.

Overall, I love the storyline. Had the text flowed a bit better, I would've rated it a higher, but as it is, 3 Stars.
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Jacqueline You are exactly right about the choppy sentences. Good review.


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