Hainish Wars: Episode VI
Return of the Anthropologist*

67 EXT. FOREST CLEARING – TOWN OF ENDTOR - LJUBOV'S CRASH SITE 67

A strange little green furry face with huge black eyes comes slowly into view. The creature is an ATHSHEAN, by the name of SELVER. He seems somewhat puzzled, and prods LJUBOV with the butt end of a spear. The anthropologist groans; this frightens the stubby ball of green fuzz and SELVER prods him again. LJUBOV sits up and stares at the three-foot-high Athshean. He tries to figure out where he is and what has happened. His clothes are torn; he's bruised and dishevelled.

The Athshean jumps up and holds the four-foot-long spear in a defensive position. LJUBOV watches him as he circles warily and begins poking him with the butt of the spear.

LJUBOV
Cut it out!

He stands up, and the Athshean quickly backs away.

LJUBOV
I'm not gonna hurt you, Selver. I came to help.

LJUBOV looks around at the dense forest, and at the charred remains of his hopper, then sits down, with a sigh, on a fallen log.

LJUBOV
Well, looks like I'm stuck here. Trouble is,
I don't know where here is.

He puts his head in his hands to rub away some of the soreness from his crash. He looks over at the watchful little Athshean and pats the log beside him.

LJUBOV
Well, maybe you can help me. Come on, sit
down.

SELVER holds his spear up warily and growls at him like a puppy.

LJUBOV pats the log again.

LJUBOV
I promise I won't hurt you. Now come here.

More chirps and squeaks from the little green creature.

LJUBOV
All right. You want something to eat?

He takes a scrap of food out of his pocket and offers it to him.

SELVER takes a step backward, then cocks his head and moves cautiously toward LJUBOV, chattering in his sing-song Athshean language.

LJUBOV
That's right. Come on. Hmmm?

Sniffing the food curiously, the Athshean comes toward LJUBOV and sits on the log beside him. He takes off his helmet, and the little creature jumps back, startled again. He runs along the log, pointing his spear and chattering a blue streak. LJUBOV holds out the helmet to him.

LJUBOV
Look, it's a hat. It's not gonna hurt you.
Look. You're a jittery little thing, aren't
you?

Reassured, SELVER lowers his spear and climbs back on the log, coming to investigate the helmet. Suddenly his ears perk up and he begins to sniff the air. He looks around warily, whispering some warning to LJUBOV.

LJUBOV
What is it?

Suddenly a bullet slams into a log next to LJUBOV. LJUBOV and SELVER both roll backwards off the log, hiding behind it. LJUBOV holds his own pistol ready, while SELVER disappears underneath the log. Another shot, and still no sight of anyone in the forest. Then LJUBOV senses something and turns to find CAPTAIN DAVIDSON standing over him with his weapon pointed at his head. He reaches out his hand for LJUBOV’s weapon.

DAVIDSON
Freeze! Come on, get up, LJUBOV!

He hands the weapon over as a second man emerges from the foliage in front of the log.

DAVIDSON
Go get your ride and take him back to base.

MAN #2
Yes, sir.

The second man starts toward his hopper, as SELVER, crouched under the log, extends his spear and hits DAVIDSON on the leg.

DAVIDSON jumps and lets out an epithet, and looks down at SELVER, puzzled. LJUBOV grabs a branch and knocks him out. He dives for his pistol, and the second man, now climbing into his hopper tries to close the hatch. LJUBOV fires away and hits the hopper’s gasline causing it to explode.

The forest is quiet once more.

SELVER pokes his fuzzy head up from behind the log and regards LJUBOV with a confused expression. He mumbles something in Athshean. LJUBOV hurries over, looking around all the time, and motions the fuzzy little creature into the dense foliage.

LJUBOV
Come on, let's get outta here.

As they move into the foliage, SELVER takes the lead. He sings and tugs at LJUBOV to follow him.

**freely adapted from scene 67 of Return of the Jedi, with a surprising minimum of alterations. Lucas must have had this book in mind when he created the Ewoks. The similarities, which go far beyond this imagined scene (and include such things as a town called "Endtor" on a forest planet), are too numerous to be coincedence.