David's review
The Catcher in the Rye
by J.D. Salinger
OMG, sensational review. I would never send you to slutty-girl boot camp. Although, if you put a whole bunch of slutty preteens together, aren't they just going to have even more, even wanton-er sex with each other in the woods when the counselors are asleep? Maybe you should want to go there.
Thanks for the kind words. I'm seriously thinking of opening a nationwide franchise of slutty-girl boot camps, where thirteen-year-olds with pierced labia and caeserean scars jump through tires on an obstacle courses and symbolically reconstruct their lost virginity on construction paper with painted macaroni and glitter. I'm looking for investors. Interested? Or we could sign you up to moderate the "Respecting My Rectum" seminars... Your call...
Thanks for the compliment, Tracy. But I like to start out big and then flame-out into a waning review-writing career of unfulfilled promise. Like Keats, only without the death thing.
Outstanding review - a student sent it my way - and it was the highlight of my day.
I am an English teacher who just (hopefully) got Catcher approved by the school board for the next 7 year run. I had kids beg me to try to get Holden back into the classroom - so rest assured there's going to be many new converts of Salinger. I am currently rereading the novel - and was warned that as a "grown up" I'd find his voice trite and "old" - but I am finding just the opposite. I love it even more - and I "get it" even more as a 37 year old. So maybe I never grew out of my teen angst either - but I don't want to. So there. Holden's voice needs to be heard. He speaks for (most) of us.
BTW, if you want some other Holdenesque recs from my students, here they are: The Perks of Being a Wallflower and also King Dork. My classroom copy of the first title is currently be held together by a rubberband because it has been loved to death by the kids and the second directly references Catcher - come to think of it, so does Perks. Salinger left his mark.
Bottom line: the kids are all right - and so are all the rest of us slutty campers.
Well said...I heartily agree!
Whew! Thought I was going to have to hate you for a second there, that was close!
great review of a vastly overrated book. Fuck Holden Caulfield and the prep school/fencing club train he rode in on.
DONALD, you're fucking full of shit. I'd like to see Holden kick Neil Young's ass. (But I repect your stupid ass opinion, brudda. May the force be with you.)
AMY, I'm glad you don't hate me, but hang in there. I'm sure I'll give you a reason in due time.
Yay! David! I think this rocks! It might surpass my liking of The Giving Tree. Maybe... I'll tell you when I'm sober.
I am sorry David but there is a High School English teacher in CT who is actually Holden Caufield, so you can't be him. I know because I am married to him. He has taught the book 1000 times, is a somewhat socially moronic preppy and his birthday is 7/17/51.
David's review
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
David's review
rating:
Okay, I need to review this book. Like your standard-issue pill-popping, prostitute-bonking televangelist, I need to spread the Word. And the Word is that this is the best book of all time, and--um, well, all you haters can just step the fuck off. (With all due respect, & etc.)
Imagine that you are in the Maury Povich show audience, if you dare. You're sandwiched between an obese women wearing a t-shirt with air-brushed running horses on the front and a tall, oily man who smells oddly like canned cat food. Out comes one of those notoriously slutty, out-of-control teenage girls who are sentenced to one of those ubiquitous slutty girl boot camps. Miss Thang makes her entrance in a tight pink midriff-bearing shirt with the word "Pussycat" sequinned right over her nascent hoo-hahs. You, the audience member, as well as your equine-celebrating neighbor (and also, less passionately, Mr. Fancy Feast) stand up and boo the living heck of this little strumpet. Who d...more
Imagine that you are in the Maury Povich show audience, if you dare. You're sandwiched between an obese women wearing a t-shirt with air-brushed running horses on the front and a tall, oily man who smells oddly like canned cat food. Out comes one of those notoriously slutty, out-of-control teenage girls who are sentenced to one of those ubiquitous slutty girl boot camps. Miss Thang makes her entrance in a tight pink midriff-bearing shirt with the word "Pussycat" sequinned right over her nascent hoo-hahs. You, the audience member, as well as your equine-celebrating neighbor (and also, less passionately, Mr. Fancy Feast) stand up and boo the living heck of this little strumpet. Who d...more
OMG, sensational review. I would never send you to slutty-girl boot camp. Although, if you put a whole bunch of slutty preteens together, aren't they just going to have even more, even wanton-er sex with each other in the woods when the counselors are asleep? Maybe you should want to go there.
Thanks for the kind words. I'm seriously thinking of opening a nationwide franchise of slutty-girl boot camps, where thirteen-year-olds with pierced labia and caeserean scars jump through tires on an obstacle courses and symbolically reconstruct their lost virginity on construction paper with painted macaroni and glitter. I'm looking for investors. Interested? Or we could sign you up to moderate the "Respecting My Rectum" seminars... Your call...
Thanks for the compliment, Tracy. But I like to start out big and then flame-out into a waning review-writing career of unfulfilled promise. Like Keats, only without the death thing.
Outstanding review - a student sent it my way - and it was the highlight of my day.
I am an English teacher who just (hopefully) got Catcher approved by the school board for the next 7 year run. I had kids beg me to try to get Holden back into the classroom - so rest assured there's going to be many new converts of Salinger. I am currently rereading the novel - and was warned that as a "grown up" I'd find his voice trite and "old" - but I am finding just the opposite. I love it even more - and I "get it" even more as a 37 year old. So maybe I never grew out of my teen angst either - but I don't want to. So there. Holden's voice needs to be heard. He speaks for (most) of us.
BTW, if you want some other Holdenesque recs from my students, here they are: The Perks of Being a Wallflower and also King Dork. My classroom copy of the first title is currently be held together by a rubberband because it has been loved to death by the kids and the second directly references Catcher - come to think of it, so does Perks. Salinger left his mark.
Bottom line: the kids are all right - and so are all the rest of us slutty campers.
Well said...I heartily agree!
Whew! Thought I was going to have to hate you for a second there, that was close!
great review of a vastly overrated book. Fuck Holden Caulfield and the prep school/fencing club train he rode in on.
DONALD, you're fucking full of shit. I'd like to see Holden kick Neil Young's ass. (But I repect your stupid ass opinion, brudda. May the force be with you.)
AMY, I'm glad you don't hate me, but hang in there. I'm sure I'll give you a reason in due time.
Yay! David! I think this rocks! It might surpass my liking of The Giving Tree. Maybe... I'll tell you when I'm sober.
I am sorry David but there is a High School English teacher in CT who is actually Holden Caufield, so you can't be him. I know because I am married to him. He has taught the book 1000 times, is a somewhat socially moronic preppy and his birthday is 7/17/51.