Jona Cannon's Reviews > Fight Less, Love More: 5-Minute Conversations to Change Your Relationship without Blowing Up or Giving In

Fight Less, Love More by Laurie Puhn
Rate this book
Clear rating

by
3633824
's review
Oct 16, 10

bookshelves: first-reads
Read from October 14 to 16, 2010

I won this book on Goodreads First Reads! Although I have read several self-help books, they are not my usual/favorite genre. Fight Less, Love More was a great read! Chapter 3 was my favorite, where Puhn spells out specific things to say to set the proper tone for any relationship. Couples wanting to improve their relationship will get a lot of mileage out of this book.

Puhn is a Harvard-educated family and divorce lawyer/mediator. She gives readers common sense tools to use to make good relationships great, or to mend struggling ones. You can buy and read this book at $24.99 for a hardcover, and be on your way, or you can pay a counselor 3 times that much each session. The math is easy.

If you're a Broncos fan you'll get this... Laurie Puhn is to Dr, Laura, what Kyle Orton is to Jake Plumber.
likeflag

Sign into Goodreads to see if any of your friends have read Fight Less, Love More.
sign in »

Comments (showing 1-4 of 4) (4 new)

dateDown_arrow    newest »

message 1: by John (new)

John Ah, you won another one! Congratulations. I'm looking forward to your review of this one. It looks interesting.


message 2: by John (last edited Oct 17, 2010 04:56PM) (new)

John I see you liked it to the tune of 4 stars. If I recall correctly, that is a pretty high rating coming from you.

I got the following from a blogger who also got an early look at the book. She said the 4 steps to her anti-conflict conversations are:
1. Sit down in private with your spouse
2. Be a detective and ask questions (Hint: you have to actually listen to your spouse’s answers and stop assuming that you know what he/she will say. Then repeat back what you heard to make sure you understood)
3. Share your perspective with your spouse
4. Find a solution together
This seems outstandingly generic to me and next to worthless. Is it an accurate statement of Puhn's method of resolving conflict? If so, I assume there must be lots of explanation about it?

Do you suppose Puhn is her real name? I wonder how a good-looking girl (a Google search revealed photos of her) with the last name Puhn (pronounced "fun" I presume) ever survived high school.

(added later)
Well, not only did she survive high school, but she was voted the most outstanding student in Great Neck North High School's class of 1995. She was also a cheerleader at Great Neck North HS. So if she was teased about her name, she must have defused the teasing without rancor.


Jona Cannon John wrote: "I see you liked it to the tune of 4 stars. If I recall correctly, that is a pretty high rating coming from you.

Yeah it seems sort of counterintuitive for me. Part of it may have been my low expectations considering the other self help books I've read. But here's the thing. I really liked it (which is the description that 4 stars are assigned by Goodreads).

I've been using the techniques advised in the 3rd chapter, which would seem to be common sense for anybody who cares about their partner. But sometimes I need a good reminder to do the right thing... and there it was. Kinda akin to going to sacrament meeting. Do we learn new things every week? No. Do we hear good reminders to do the right thing? Yes. That's my analogy, and I'm stickin' to it.

John also said: Do you suppose Puhn is her real name? I wonder how a good-looking girl (a Google search revealed photos of her) with the last name Puhn (pronounced "fun" I presume) ever survived high school.

I've been pronouncing it like "Poon" in my mind, but for all I know it may be pronounce "fun" or possibly "Jones". You never can tell with someones name.


message 4: by John (new)

John Jona said: "I've been using the techniques advised in the 3rd chapter, which would seem to be common sense for anybody who cares about their partner. But sometimes I need a good reminder to do the right thing... and there it was. Kinda akin to going to sacrament meeting. Do we learn new things every week? No. Do we hear good reminders to do the right thing? Yes. That's my analogy, and I'm stickin' to it."

Excellent analogy. I probably ought to read the 3rd chapter.

Jona also said: "I've been pronouncing it like "Poon" in my mind, but for all I know it may be pronounce "fun" or possibly "Jones". You never can tell with someones name."

I figured there was only one way to learn how her name is pronounced and that is to hear her say it. I couldn't find a place where she said her name, but on her web site there are some video clips where an interviewer says it. Here's how it goes...consider "hewn" (as in a hewn log) and replace the "h" sound with "p". Another try...say it like "Pyoon" or "Pūoon". But if you just can't sleep without knowing for sure, go to http://www.lauriepuhn.com/ and click on any of the video clips.

What a relief to know it isn't pronounced "fun"!


back to top