Karla's Reviews > The Forgotten Legion

The Forgotten Legion by Ben Kane
Rate this book
Clear rating

by
2846441
Reasons Why I DNF:

1) The narrator, Michael Praed, needed some clamps on his sensitive areas and someone to flip the switch to give him a bit of energy. It was a dull reading, and his pace was slow, so it felt like things were never moving along. Yeah, yeah, I know. How could Robin of Sherwood & Prince Michael of Moldavia suck ass?!?! Well, there should be some kind of retribution for that stupid Dynasty wedding bomb cliffie.

2) Actually things didn't move along. The story was choppy and very episodic, with years passing in-between chapters and scenes switching between the characters as their paths converged at a snail's pace. Even though the timeline was leaping around, the action and characters weren't.

3) The character types were the ones we've seen out of Central Casting scores of times. The gruff mentor, the wide-eyed innocent hero, the long-suffering mother, the mystic seer, the innocent girl robbed of her virtue, the fat and greedy merchant, etc.

4) The dialogue. Dull as dishwater, so much it being filler. This book is over 550 pages and stuffed full of descriptions and exchanges between the characters that had little to no point and weight at all.

5) (view spoiler) Sorry, that doesn't fly. Colleen McCullough's version may have been biased to make him seem perfect, but he was still a believable Roman, politician, and dictator rather than a cheap hook for a lame revenge plot that, apparently, gets dragged out over 3 doorstoppers.

After not even reaching the halfway point and feeling that very little had happened, I decided to bail and save myself the pain. I was looking forward to this series, but the execution was way too sluggish and bloated.

I give it 1.5 stars even though I didn't finish it, but I think I know what would have happened: fight, hack, slash, boring talk, wooden sex, boring dialogue, fight, yell, sex, boring dialogue, and so on until a non-ending that screams, "Buy my next book to see what happens!" Uhhh, no thanks.

The author also seems to give the impression of being quite the proactive, passive-aggressive asshat when it comes to negative reviews - at least on Amazon US & UK. That was an ugly little discovery in my search for similarly disenchanted opinions about this book.
14 likes · likeflag

Sign into Goodreads to see if any of your friends have read The Forgotten Legion.
sign in »

Reading Progress

03/27/2012
14.0% "Pretty meh so far. Just when I thought the story was moving along, we shifted time and character."
03/29/2012
28.0% "Ehhhh, still not feeling it. Maybe it's the narrator. He's boring the hell out of me."
04/02/2012
43.0% "If Romulus' & Fabiola's backalley rapist-daddy turns out to be who I've feared it was ever since it happened.... *facepalm*" 6 comments

Comments (showing 1-10 of 10) (10 new)

dateDown arrow    newest »

message 1: by Sarah (new)

Sarah I *heart* Robin of Sherwood, but Michael Praed was the most wooden actor in the entire series...so I'm not surprised. :P


Karla He looks it from all the photos I've seen. I never saw the show and only remember it as a kid because there was a picture of the cast in an issue of Starlog. I'm aghast all over again at the hardcore mullet that Robin sported. LOL Ahhhhh, the 80s.....


message 3: by Willow (new)

Willow It's so hard to find good toga porn, isn’t it? :(


I must admit, I’m perplexed. Why would Julius Caesar rape a slave girl in an alley when he could own her and have her sleep in his bed?

I know what you mean about changing historical figures like Julius Caesar. I have a hard time brushing that aside. I remember watching this movie about Anthony and Cleopatra, and they made Octavius this cowardly, backstabbing, spoiled brat, and while I’m sure he had his faults, I just couldn’t see the emperor Augustus as a coward.

Thanks for your lovely review, as always. :D


Karla Willowfaerie wrote: "I must admit, I’m perplexed. Why would Julius Caesar rape a slave girl in an alley when he could own her and have her sleep in his bed?"

And to add insult to injury, the "reason" why he rapes her is because he'd been politicking for months, his wife was sick, and he hadn't had a woman in a while and he wanted one now.

Sorry, even looking at Julius Caesar without CMC's rose-tinted glasses, I can't see him doing that. Because I had this dread of who the rapist was, I googled for spoilers and was so glad I did.

I'd be curious which movie that was with the cowardly Octavian. I liked Roddy McDowell well enough in the Taylor-Burton Cleopatra. Other Octavians have been forgettable, though. I just had to go to IMDB to see who else has played him in the Caesar/Cleopatra stuff I've seen.


message 5: by Willow (new)

Willow It was a mini series. Here's the link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0178130/

Rupert Graves played Octavian, and actually I really like him as an actor. It was just the way Octavian was written. I probably just have Brian Blessed etched in my mind as Augustus from I Cladius. LOL


message 6: by Sarah (new)

Sarah Karla (Mossy Love Grotto) wrote: "He looks it from all the photos I've seen. I never saw the show and only remember it as a kid because there was a picture of the cast in an issue of Starlog."

M.P. & Jason Connery both sported some dreadful mullets in that show. It's part of that 80s charm. :D That & the crappy film quality (they cleaned it up a LOT for the dvd, but it's still murky) & the repetitive celtic music from Clannad. Bwahaha. But it remains my favorite onscreen interpretation of John, The Sheriff, & Sir Guy. The three of them together in any scene is guaranteed awesomeness.


message 7: by Karla (last edited Apr 04, 2012 03:22AM) (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla Willowfaerie wrote: "It was a mini series. Here's the link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0178130/"

Oh I've seen that one! Don't remember Rupert Graves at all, though. I don't think I stopped being O__o and D:= at Billy Zane as Mark Antony. I have yet to see I Claudius, which is TOTAL FAIL on my part. :(

Sarah, I'll be running to Youtube because I have to complete the Connery triumvirate of acting. (Remember Sean's brother Neil from "Operation Double 007"? Mwahaha! It was MSTed.)


message 8: by Sarah (new)

Sarah Ha! The Jason Connery era sported some of my fave RoS episodes. :D He ain't a very good actor, but who cares? He spends a lot more time smirking than Praed did, so he must've have a better sense of humor about the show.


message 9: by Ben (new)

Ben Kane "Proactive, passive-aggressive asshat"? I had to look up the last insult to find out what it meant. What a lovely thing to say about someone. It's nice to know that you feel free to insult an author in this manner but feel it inappropriate that an author ever reply to negative reviews.


message 10: by Karla (new) - rated it 1 star

Karla Well, it looks like you just did, and I'm letting your comment remain in a free exchange of dialogue. So yay.

If it helps, my mother listened to "Hannibal" and loved it. She's listening to this now and no complaints. Sending the warm and fuzzies your way.


back to top