Caris's Reviews > The Return of the King

The Return of the King by J.R.R. Tolkien
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Aug 20, 10

bookshelves: 2010
Read from July 24 to August 19, 2010

How I Spent My Summer Vacation
by: Caris “The O’Malley” O’Malley

This summer was really good. I got to do a lot of neat things. The best part of the whole summer was that I got to spend it with my new best friend Johnny. Johnny is my friend because he’s smart and he tells good stories and his mustash tickles. The stories he tells are filled with creatures and adventures, so they’re really good.

Johnny is really serious about his stories. Sometimes he gets really detailed about little things and I have to call him a fuckstick. Some things that made me call him a fuckstick are: lots of walking and funny names. When Johnny gets going though there’s no stopping him. We have to read a lot of books in school but none of them are as good as Johnny’s stories.

It seems like school got out forever ago and just a day ago at the same time. Right when school got out, Johnny started telling me his story, called The Lord of the Rings. This is the story about two little people called Hobbits who go on an adventure. They meet lots of people along the way. Some of them are good and some of them are bad. One of the things that makes me hate Johnny is that a lot of the boring characters are in the story a lot and some of the cool ones (like Tom Bombadil) are just forgotten in the past of the story.

Right before school started, Johnny told me the last part of the story. It was called The Return of the King. A lot of things happen in this part and it was the most exciting I think. I really liked the end and wished it would have been longer. It is the conclusion of all I had heard this summer. The end was very sad, but happy at the same time because everything worked out good for the characters.

I feel like I spent a million years in Middle Earth this summer. That’s the setting of the story. I feel like I am now friends with Bilbo and Sam. They are the main characters in the story. Middle Earth is a nice place to go, especially when my dad is drinking a lot and my mom yells at him. No one does those things in the Shire. The Shire which is also the setting is where the Hobbits live.

The Lord of the Rings taught me a lot about what it means to be someone’s friend. It was Frodo’s job to get rid of the ring, but his friend Sam stayed with him to the end. There was nothing that could keep Sam away from Frodo, not even spiders. Sam would do anything to make Frodo happier even if it meant giving him his last piece of food or his cloak to sleep on. I think if everyone was willing to give their cloak away to their friends then the world would be nicer.

The other thing I liked about the story was that there weren’t very many girls in it. There were a couple but they didn’t do anything really and they weren’t around for long. One of those girls I think was a boy anyway because she wanted to fight with the soldiers. She was okay I guess.

I don’t want to spoil the story for anyone, but I want to talk about the end. The end was my favorite part. The adventures in far away places was cool but the Shire was neatest. I liked how Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin came back to the Shire and took over again. Saruman an evil wizard decided to take over the Shire after the ring was destroyed and the evil armies were defeated. The Hobbits were not scared though because they knew they could beat him because Galdalf already did. It was really cool when Peter Pettigrew killed him with a knife then got shot by some Hobbits. I didnt really understand that part though. Why would Saruman go back to one of the only places his enemies would return to? He should of known he would catch a beat down there. If he was smart he would have gone somewhere else like America or Mexico. Even though it was a weird part I liked seeing the Hobbits being heroes.

That was what I did this summer. It was fun. I hope next summer will be as fun as this one was. When I am an old man I bet I will want to hear Johnny’s story again. But next summer I want to go to camp instead.
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Reading Progress

08/07/2010 page 200
39.0% "Galdalf: Gimme my hobbit back!" 5 comments
08/07/2010 page 201
39.0% "[image error]" 10 comments
08/19/2010 page 512
100.0% "Well, I'm back." 1 comment

Comments (showing 1-21 of 21) (21 new)

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Brad You no nuts...you crazy!


Caris Prepare to meet Sauron- in HELL!


Brad No! What are you doing?!


Caris Brad, cover your heart!


message 5: by Brad (last edited Aug 19, 2010 08:00PM) (new) - rated it 5 stars

Brad Oh my God!


message 6: by [deleted user] (new)

*dies*


message 7: by Eh?Eh! (new)

Eh?Eh! Wait. You're on page 512 of 1437 and you say you're done? Or is that status update thing wrong?

(Saruman was the evil wizard who returned to the Shire, not Sauron)

Wow, O'Malley. Sounds like this wrung you out! For this book report, you get a C-.


message 8: by Sparrow (new) - added it

Sparrow But an A+ for general awesomeness. Sometimes it's about the sentiment, not the details. This is added to my mental list of all-time favorite reviews.


message 9: by Eh?Eh! (new)

Eh?Eh! Oh man, yes.


message 10: by Caris (last edited Aug 20, 2010 08:25AM) (new) - rated it 4 stars

Caris Eh! Bridge-Humper wrote: "Wait. You're on page 512 of 1437 and you say you're done? Or is that status update thing wrong?

(Saruman was the evil wizard who returned to the Shire, not Sauron)

Wow, O'Malley. Sounds like t..."


Status update thing is wrong.

In the original story, um, Johnny switched Saruman's and Sauron's places. But I'll change it to reflect popular opinion. Am I wrong to be annoyed that the names have to be so similar and odd at the same time?


message 11: by Sparrow (new) - added it

Sparrow Caris wrote: "Am I wrong to be annoyed that the names have to be so similar and odd at the same time?"

You are not wrong. You are absolutely correct.


Caris Thanks, Elizabeth.


message 13: by Newengland (new)

Newengland Entertaining review (not that you have to entertain me every review, but it's always a great bonus!)....


message 14: by Caris (last edited Aug 21, 2010 10:15AM) (new) - rated it 4 stars

Caris Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it.


message 15: by Michael (new)

Michael IM GLAD YOUVE' SCENE THE LIGHT, CARIS. THANK'S FOR WRITING A REVIEW ABOUT TOLKIEN WITHOUT ALL THE GAYNESS OF YOUR FELLOWSHIP REVIEW.


Caris You just reminded me of when Frodo woke up naked and Sam kissed him.


message 17: by [deleted user] (new)

Wait, are you suggesting there are homoerotic undertones in Prof. Tolkien's fictions?

(Shouting Michael is such a great gag. Man.)


Caris Ceridwen wrote: "Wait, are you suggesting there are homoerotic undertones in Prof. Tolkien's fictions?"

I'm saying there are blatant homoerotic plot points.


message 19: by Michael (new)

Michael (Shouting Michael is such a great gag. Man.)

SHOUTING MICHAEL NEVER GETS OLD, EVEN WHEN HES DONE IT IN LIKE NINE LOAD OF THE RINGS REVIEWS.


Rachel Caroline Deacons Hehe...Peter Pettigrew.


message 21: by Lara (new) - added it

Lara I can't believe no one noticed the Peter Pettigrew. I guess they thought he was a rat.


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