This book is about coping mechanisms (based on meditation and Buddhist concepts) for dealing with minor and major issues. As I was reading this, so maThis book is about coping mechanisms (based on meditation and Buddhist concepts) for dealing with minor and major issues. As I was reading this, so many of my friends on Facebook had recently been complaining about being fed up with comments and posts from other people, and I kept thinking how applicable these techniques are for dealing with that. This book suggests ways to deal with other things that annoy us throughout the day: traffic, an annoying co-worker, a long line at the grocery store, etc, etc.
Some loosely and not so eloquently paraphrased excepts that are pertinent to me:
When things fall apart, it's an opportunity to get in touch with our pain, to "wake up" and to realize our connection to all other humans who have suffered. Sometimes it takes a crisis to wake us up from moving blindly through our days.
Being more aware of our emotions and dealing with them better is good not just for ourselves but for the entire planet.
If the pooh hits the fan, it doesn't mean it's gonna stay that way forever.
Our behavior is universal. Keep in mind that the same way someone might be irritating you is also the same way you might be irritating someone else. Recognize when you are devoting too much negative energy to the situation and make the decision to not let it affect you. Tap into your "natural intelligence, natural warmth and natural openness."
NI: Knowing intuitively what is the right thing to do. NW: Empathy NO: Having an open mind
3 steps to dealing with shenpa, or, the thing that "hooks you." Acknowledge it, feel it and analyze it, and relax and move on. The more you deal with it, the more you lose your appetite for biting the hook and your appetite for aggression. It also prepares you for the pooh hitting the fan. Shenpa = "the urge, the hook, that triggers our habitual tendency to close down. We get hooked in that moment of tightening when we reach for relief."
The importance of pausing throughout the day. Pausing is simply stopping throughout the day to take 3 deep breaths and reflect. Use a post it note or an alarm on your phone as a reminder to do so. It's important to take the time to pause even when you think you are much too busy to pause. This is actually the time you need it the most. Pausing = mindfulness?
Some direct quotes:
"We are never encouraged to experience the ebb and flow of our moods, of our health, of the weather, of outer events--pleasant and unpleasant--in their fullness. Instead we stay caught in a fearful, narrow holding pattern of avoiding any pain and continually seeking comfort. This is the universal dilemma."
"We all have the natural ability to interrupt our old habits."
"Meditation can be described as learning how to stay with the itch and the urge to scratch without scratching."
"Having compassion for oneself is the basis for developing compassion for others."
"Buddhism encourages us never to reject what is problematic but rather to become very familiar with it."
"In the Buddhist teachings, it is said that the root of our discontent is self-absorption and our fear of being present." Running away from this is "ego." We feel a compulsion to distract ourselves even when we're not uncomfortable. Staying present and pausing are ways to avoid this. Specific examples: going outside and being in your natural surroundings and observing them. Taking one minute to just sit and listen attentively to what is around you. Pausing. ...more
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