It's Carl's 18th birthday. When the shy virgin teenager is sent on an errand to deliver a parcel to one of his mother's workmates he falls into the haIt's Carl's 18th birthday. When the shy virgin teenager is sent on an errand to deliver a parcel to one of his mother's workmates he falls into the hands of a pair of twin sisters. They insist on drying his wet clothes, one thing leads to another, and soon they are introducing him to the pleasures of the flesh. This pair of thirty-somethings scold him, tease him and call him a "little boy". And it isn't long before one of them is donning her dominatrix outfit. It is not only a birthday Carl will never forget, it turns out to be the start of an exciting career in the delivery of pleasure to women.
This second entry in Jan Osah's CFNM series is loads of fun. The dynamic is similar to the later CFNM Pizza Delivery, which is also recommended to anyone who enjoys this story....more
The first book in Series 2 of the Kinky Mom series picks up where the first series left off. Molly and her daughters escaped from Serenade Springs, buThe first book in Series 2 of the Kinky Mom series picks up where the first series left off. Molly and her daughters escaped from Serenade Springs, but the evil that lurked there has survived. In fact it is now spreading across the globe. Molly finds herself in a underground high security military prison and under interrogation. Can she persuade her captors of what really happened? And where are her daughters?
This first instalment delivers the intrigue and shocks to keep you hanging on every word, especially now that the threat is of Doomsday proportions. How Molly and her daughters will find a way to meet this challenge I can't imagine. And there are a few hot sex scenes to whet our appetite for what is no doubt to come as the story builds to its climax in future episodes....more
A medical examination involving a sexy female doctor is a standard CFNM (clothed female nude male) fantasy, but also one of the most absurd. This isn'A medical examination involving a sexy female doctor is a standard CFNM (clothed female nude male) fantasy, but also one of the most absurd. This isn't a problem, the extremity of a story's bending of the rules of reality to pander to the male reader's fantasies is all part of the fun.
Here we have not just a sexy doctor, but also a pair of young student doctors, all of whom have a polymorphous enjoyment of sex and a complete lack of scruples about taking advantage of male patients, not to mention keeping sick patients waiting while they engage in energetic, messy and orgiastic sex all over the examination room.
In reality, when we go to see the doctor, we tend to be sick, worried or in pain. Doctor's examination rooms aren't that sexy. I do remember a very sexy optometrist sparking a fantasy about what could take place in the intimacy of an eye test room, but I can't ever remember fantasising about a doctor.
This story is a little shorter than most in the series, but there is no shortage of sexy action. This is a healthy specimen of the CFNM erotica story, but beware, it may raise your blood pressure....more
When Rod nervously asks his wife Charlotte if he can go to a CFNM (clothed female nude male) party, he is surprised when, after a little hesitation, sWhen Rod nervously asks his wife Charlotte if he can go to a CFNM (clothed female nude male) party, he is surprised when, after a little hesitation, she agrees. The condition is that he let her blindfold him and tie him to the kitchen table for her own pleasure first. She uses him, but doesn't untie him. Hours later she returns home with five of her friends. It's a CFNM party, but not the way Rod had imagined it. He is bound and at the mercy of women he will never see. And the proceedings are being filmed.
Charlotte uses her husband's desperation to fulfil his fantasy to unleash her inner dominatrix. Is she really this sadistic by nature, or is she putting on an act? What is certain is that poor Rod comes in for some vicious treatment, from humiliating comments about the diminutive size of his generative organ to the cruel and unusual use of a carrot. As is usually the case in these stories, however, he learns that such abuse can serve to enhance his sexual pleasure.
The fantasies presented in this entry in Jan Osah's CFNM series (bondage, blindfold, carrot, etc.) may not be the ones I favour in this kind of story, but there is plenty of erotic and raunchy action and the usual amusement involved in the pervert in peril scenario, so it still gets my recommendation....more
Frank and Dave's female working companions have a "respond in kind" approach to sexual harassment, but with 25 of them and only two misbehaving malesFrank and Dave's female working companions have a "respond in kind" approach to sexual harassment, but with 25 of them and only two misbehaving males it is hardly an even match. When Frank slaps the bottom of a waitress during the work Xmas party, and Dave responds approvingly, it is the final straw. If the pair are going to redeem themselves and keep their jobs, they will need not only to submit to all kinds of humiliation but also fully satisfy the lusts of the drunk and demanding damsels.
The novelty in this entry in Jan Osah's enjoyable CFNM series is the sheer number of female tormentors. This means that we don't get a chance to really know them as individuals. Some are briefly sketched in, while others are nameless extras in the crowd. The story is more about the experience of being caught up in a sea of rampant female sexuality than the detailed portrayal of a group of individuals, and yet the personalities of those who play the major roles are effectively displayed in their actions and raunchy dialogue.
The stamina of Dave and Frank may exceed the bounds of probability, but realism is hardly the major selling point of these stories. There is plenty of variety to the sexual acts which the pair are required to perform on the women and which are performed on them. There are competitions and prizes to be won. The question this story raises, to a greater degree even than other CFNM stories, is : "Can you have too much of a good thing?" It may be the season to be jolly, but will these two merry gentlemen ever get a chance to rest?...more
Nick Offerman is a fine craftsman, whether it comes to performing comic or serious acting roles, writing a book about his life or (apparently) makingNick Offerman is a fine craftsman, whether it comes to performing comic or serious acting roles, writing a book about his life or (apparently) making tables and canoes. Sure this book may not be as hilarious as his performance of Ron Swanson in Parks and Recreation, or even his scene stealing role in an otherwise forgettable movie like We're the Millers (after all he doesn't write the dialogue for those performances), but he does have his own wry authorial voice, replete with corny gags, which will put a smile on your face. And when he has a funny anecdote to relate, you may well laugh out loud.
Offerman is way too young to have enough dramatic experiences to fill an autobiography, so this is part life story and part advice manual, as he gives us his recommendations for achieving success and enjoyment (maybe the same thing) in the fields of life, love and the profession of pretending to be other people. He is a pleasant guy to spend time with, and his advice seems pretty sound. The book will be especially useful to those setting out in the acting field. But, then, is it not true, to quote the Kinks, that "everybody's in showbiz". Are job interviews and first dates not just a different kind of audition for a part? So even when he hones in on the acting, the advice he gives is useful for us all.
O.K. So I didn't find the book persuasive enough to be currently carving my own canoe paddle out of wood I chopped myself, but hopefully a little of Offerman's wisdom and lust for life rubbed off on me in the reading....more
When sex-crazed nerd girl Buffy Zelous attends a showing of "Akira" at her college's Anime Club, she gets drunk on shots and agrees to perform a stripWhen sex-crazed nerd girl Buffy Zelous attends a showing of "Akira" at her college's Anime Club, she gets drunk on shots and agrees to perform a striptease. The film is stopped so that she can strip and masturbate for the all-male audience. The story ends with her about to put on a sex show with one of the guys, which is related in another story.
The plot and characterisations may be slight, but if you like stories about slutty anime fans, you'll want to check it out. I know that the prospect of something like this happening is the only thing which would induce me to try watching "Akira" again....more
When an act of sabotage causes her to pop out of her Pikachu costume, uninhibited nerd girl Buffy Zelous becomes all the rage of the comic book convenWhen an act of sabotage causes her to pop out of her Pikachu costume, uninhibited nerd girl Buffy Zelous becomes all the rage of the comic book convention.
This is a very brief story but told with winning enthusiasm. It ends with the prospect of raunchier shenanigans to take place at the After Party, which will be related in the next story....more
Goldie is angry about the fact that her father was driven away by her mother's promiscuous behaviour. When her mother brings home a new man, Goldie fiGoldie is angry about the fact that her father was driven away by her mother's promiscuous behaviour. When her mother brings home a new man, Goldie finds herself with conflicting feelings. Her resentment of him is tempered by the unexpected growth of exhibitionistic desires. How far will she go to explore these new feelings?
This story is very well-written. Candace Mia has done a great job of taking us into the interior world of her central character and building tension as she struggles with her unfamiliar feelings. What surprised me a little is that the story didn't go as far as I was expecting. Since it is the first of a series, I think this is a good thing. Too often an author will go all out with the first story and the later ones become more of the same. This feels like the beginning of a story which will build in intensity with each instalment....more
When Avaline, a sexy girl in her early twenties, discovers that Gerry, a man in his forties, has been using his webcam to spy on her through her bedroWhen Avaline, a sexy girl in her early twenties, discovers that Gerry, a man in his forties, has been using his webcam to spy on her through her bedroom window, she and her cousin Louise decide to teach him a lesson. Either he submits to their sadistic whims or they'll call the police.
My favourite three fiction genres are humour, horror and erotica, and CFNM (clothed female nude male) erotica stories like this one are a bit of all three. I found myself chuckling at Gerry's plight. I cringed in horror when Avaline and Louise did terrible things to his bottom. And I was turned on by all the raunchy sex.
One thing that I like about the two CFNM stories of Jan Osah's that I've read so far (and I hope this isn't too much of a spoiler) is that the power balance is righted by the end of the story.
One problem that can occur with dominance and submission themed stories is that, if one party remains always in the dominant role and the other in the submissive role there isn't much of a dynamic to the story and it can be dull. Gerry doesn't want to be submissive. He abuses a situation of power over Avaline, without her knowledge. When he is caught, the power shifts as a result and he must submit to the will of the two women, something which he finds arousing as well as humiliating and painful. But once atonement has been made, everyone gets what they want without anyone being in a dominant or submissive position.
CFNM stories like this one, in their own over-the-top way, present an optimistic view of the battle of the sexes. A man treats women as nothing but sex objects. Instead of simply criticising him and thus driving him away, she treats him as a sex object, which means that he has a chance to see things from the other perspective, but at the same time she realises that she likes treating men the way he liked treating women. They are really not so unalike after all. Thus a kind of Jungian wholeness and harmony is achieved, along with a lot of non-oppressive bonking.
Or perhaps I'm reading too much into what is, essentially, just kinky porn....more
I've expressed my views on the writings of Jeremy Griffith in great detail in my review of Beyond The Human Condition, so I won't repeat myself here.I've expressed my views on the writings of Jeremy Griffith in great detail in my review of Beyond The Human Condition, so I won't repeat myself here. However one passage of this book gives a particularly good illustration of what is wrong with Griffith's approach.
Here is what he has to say about homosexuality (pg. 336) :
It follows that the more corrupted a man is, the less naive he is and thus the more he is aware that women are not innocent. Therefore, if a man is extremely hurt and corrupted in his infancy and childhood, when he becomes sexually mature he will not be naive enough to believe that women are still innocent and he will thus not find women sexually attractive. The last bastion of 'attractive' innocence for such men is younger men, because they are not as exposed to sexual destruction as women have historically been.
While I find arguments that homosexuality is in inborn trait unconvincing, I find this explanation even less so. Note that there is no mention of bisexuality. Griffith seems to have a dualistic view of homosexuality and heterosexuality which contradicts the real-life experience of countless thousands of men who enjoy having sex with both men and women. And there is also no acknowledgement of sexual relationships between older men in which no younger man is involved. This seems to me to be symptomatic of his general approach, which is to search for "evidence" which can be taken out of context or misrepresented in order to support a pre-existing theory. This is not science.
He also says (pg. 337) :
With regard to whether homosexuals are 'born' or 'made', even without the ability to explain the human condition and thus defend the corrupted state of humans (i.e. explain that humans' various states of corruption are not 'bad' or evil but are in fact immensely heroic states), a decade-long research project completed at the Institute for Sex Research in Bloomington, Indiana, found that, 'a quarter of the gays interviewed believe [are prepared to acknowledge?] homosexuality is an emotional disorder' (Time magazine, 17 July 1978).
The scientific approach to interpreting this information needs to look at all possible explanations. If our beliefs about ourselves are largely dictated by the beliefs that are prevalent in the society in which we grew up, is it surprising that homosexuals who grew up within a society which believed that homosexuality was either a sin or an emotional disorder would often believe what they had been told?
He also quotes from Dr. Robert Kronemeyer, one of those psychologists who tries to help people change their sexual orientation :
'Homosexuality is a symptom of neurosis and of a grievous personality disorder. It is an outgrowth of deeply rooted emotional deprivations and disturbances that had their origins in infancy.' (Overcoming Homosexuality, 1980)
Most of the men who seek the services of individuals like Dr. Kronemeyer do so because they feel that their homosexuality is in contravention of their religion. It is not surprising that someone will end up emotionally disturbed if they grow up in a religion which shows an unhealthy intolerance for their possibly natural desires.
Of course I have my own views on these matters. I don't think the desire of one man to have sex with another man needs any explanation beyond the fact that we like to do things which are pleasurable. Tender affectionate contact between two or more humans is inherently pleasurable and rubbing one's penis in a warm tight place until orgasm is pleasurable. I haven't done these things with another man because I have an inhibition towards such activities. My attraction to women is far stronger, because a woman represents the denied aspect of myself (the feminine) with which I long to reconnect, so there is no need for me to contravene my learned inhibition in this area. The other fact that needs to be taken into account is that of fixations. If we feel that some aspect of ourselves is not accepted then we may fixate on it, because what we most long for is to be unconditionally accepted as we are. And I think that this is why exclusive homosexuality (as opposed to bisexuality) tends to grow in homophobic societies, i.e. societies which are intolerant towards the homosexual end of the spectrum or our essentially bisexual erotic nature. Usually it seems best to go with the simplest explanation for any phenomena, and the simplest explanation for the varieties of sexuality is to begin with the pleasure principle, that we tend to seek out what feels good and avoid what feels bad, and then add the factor of inhibitions and fixations both of which are responses to the beliefs of others, ranging out from those close to us to the whole of a society. It is where the pleasure principle is frustrated that anti-social feelings build and the desire to harm others arises.
There are quite a few individuals who have written books claiming to reveal the ultimate truth of life, the universe and everything. If someone actually achieved this, I don't think they would make such a song and dance about it. They would know that, as the truth, it would have the desired effect. It would be known by the fruit that it produced. Sometimes the vociferousness with which someone proclaims that they have the arrived at the ultimate truth is really evidence of a desperate need to convince themselves that they have, because they are too afraid to take the next step down that path, the step which takes them beyond their prejudices, their attachments and their self-image....more
The title of Ian Watson's latest collection of movie reviews is appropriate. Crack is a drug which gives an instant but short lived high, and its addiThe title of Ian Watson's latest collection of movie reviews is appropriate. Crack is a drug which gives an instant but short lived high, and its addictiveness stops users from caring about much else. The motivating force of life is the pleasure principle. We decide what to do in our lives on the basis of what is likely to give us short-term or long-term pleasure and allow us to avoid suffering. Often this produces healthy results. We strive to do something well in order to enjoy the fruits of our labour. But what happens if we are rewarded for doing the wrong thing instead of the right thing? This is the problem with crack. Crack rewards anything you do that gets you more crack.
So what does this have to do with movies? The way the movie industry is supposed to work is that the filmmakers try to make movies which will please their audiences, and if they do, the audiences reward them with money. In theory, as with natural selection in the animal kingdom, the health of the system is fostered by the fact that those able to function well survive and those who can't don't. All of this depends on the selectivity of movie patrons. If we pay to see bad movies, we'll get more bad movies. Many of the movies reviewed in this book are sequels or remakes or based on video games. Title recognition has become a major factor in what movies get made and, often, which ones are a success. A new Godzilla or Robocop or Nightmare on Elm Street may be good or bad, but many of us will feel we better check it out anyway. We wouldn't want to miss it if it's good, and we wouldn't want to miss the opportunity to bitch about it with fellow fans if it isn't. Which means we all go and its a success whether its good or bad.
And some of the movies reviewed are themselves like crack. There is no rich fabric of life experience for a crackhead. There is only the momentary explosions of excitement. Just like the explosions that dominate a Michael Bay movie. Blockbuster movies are often compared to amusement park rides. Some have even been based on amusement park rides. But if we went on the roller coaster every day we would quickly get bored with roller coasters. We never get sick of stories, but we are going to get progressively more desensitised to, and thus bored with, sensory overload entertainment.
These themes run through the reviews here, but Watson's aim is not to undertake a deep and meaningful examination of this phenomenon. His aim is to make us laugh with his acid sarcasm and bitchy digs at those responsible for some of the most shameless excuses for cinema of recent years.
On Paris Hilton :
...Hilton, who's spent all that time and money keeping herself in the public eye, should consider investing in a second facial expression.
On Halloween : The Curse of Michael Myers (1995) :
One shouldn't mock the afflicted, but Halloween 6 is kinda like watching a Nazi biker attempt to explain Mein Kampf to a masturbating chimpanzee - indefensible, but also weirdly compelling in its own twisted way.
Along with the shoddy horror remakes, crass would-be comedies and relentlessly unthrilling action films, Watson also levels his scorn at one film which was a critic's darling at the time of its release. You'll have to read the book to find out which, but I agree with his take on it.
While Watson doesn't recommend us to see most of the films he reviews here, there are some he offers up as unintentionally hilarious gems of ineptitude. I think there are a few which I enjoyed more than he did. It may be a shameful confession but I love The Color of Night (1994) and Sorority Row (2009). And I remember thinking that the Michael Bay produced Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003) was a pretty intense thrill-ride. Hell, I even had fun with Armageddon (1998), though not enough to have ever revisited it. Mostly, though, I found myself in agreement with Watson's assessments of those movies I'd seen.
Why read a book which only reviews bad movies, most of which are bad in unenjoyable ways? Because, in the fire of Watson's flamboyantly articulate scorn you may find catharsis and thus healing for all of the pain inflicted by having so often shelled out your hard earned money to see a limp wet fart of a movie.*
George is a pizza delivery guy, dropping off his last order on a wet and miserable day. Gwen, his sexy lady customer, doesn't have change. Neither doeGeorge is a pizza delivery guy, dropping off his last order on a wet and miserable day. Gwen, his sexy lady customer, doesn't have change. Neither does her sister, Robyn, or her friend Jill. Over-excited by Gwen's flirty manner and a brief glimpse of Robyn in her undies, George makes the mistake of suggesting that the ladies pay for the pizza with sexual services. The women decide he needs to be punished. Of course in this kind of story, you just know he's liable to enjoy his punishment so much that it is more like a reward. But the ladies' interest is not really in the rehabilitation of chauvinistic young men, it's in securing a plaything to meet their wildest desires.
While the writing occasionally leaves a little to be desired - the odd badly constructed sentence - this is made immaterial by the fact that the story is so much fun. If shameless pandering to the fantasies of the reader is what erotica is all about, and this is especially the case with fetish erotica, then this story is the real deal.
As women in CFNM (clothed female nude male) fetish stories go, these women are fairly soft-hearted. They put our hero in his place, and make him pay a price for his pleasures, but don't resort to anything painful enough to contravene the Geneva Convention.
This is a world were nobody seems to acknowledge that sister-sister incest is a taboo and where confirmed lesbianism is instantly cured by a mouthful of something which begins with "p" but isn't pizza.
I'll definitely be reading all the rest of Jan Osah's CFNM series....more
Amber is visiting a casino and finds herself disgusted by the blatantly slutty way some women dress there. When she meets a sexy man who claims he canAmber is visiting a casino and finds herself disgusted by the blatantly slutty way some women dress there. When she meets a sexy man who claims he can transform her in a week into a woman who will happily dress in such a way in public she takes him up on the challenge.
Another of Nikki Palmer's stories of dominance and submission, filled with raunchy scenes of group sex. The plot won't surprise you, but the action is hot and the dialogue and narrative are particularly elegant and engaging....more
Emily is frustrated when her jerk of a boyfriend cancels their date at the last minute. So she takes consolation in a conversation with her on-line frEmily is frustrated when her jerk of a boyfriend cancels their date at the last minute. So she takes consolation in a conversation with her on-line friend Dale. Dale offers to come over and make some of her sexual fantasies come true.
I like Nikki Palmer's stories the best when they are sweet and funny. Emily has a good time in this story and her fantasies are realised, but the crude to sweet ratio tips a little further toward the crude than appeals to me. A good read but not one of my favourites....more
College girl Darci is pleasuring herself when she receives a prank call from a male student. Their conversation leads to an invitation to partake of gCollege girl Darci is pleasuring herself when she receives a prank call from a male student. Their conversation leads to an invitation to partake of group sex at his place.
Nikki Palmer has written quite a few gang bang stories. This one doesn't really stand out from the crowd, but it is still very sexy and the final scene made me smile....more
Brandi is a college girl who is still a virgin. She's in love with her boyfriend Pete. Little does she know that her first sex with him will lead herBrandi is a college girl who is still a virgin. She's in love with her boyfriend Pete. Little does she know that her first sex with him will lead her down the path to becoming a sex slave who will be sold at auction.
This story is very similar in theme and plot to Kelli Learns to be Bad. I liked this one a bit better. With Brandi there is more of a sense of her anxiety at finding herself being subjected to humiliating situations, and also more of a sense of her excitement when she discovers that she is turned on by them. And there is more of a sense of humour, particularly in the second part of the story when she is a little too honest in her opinions of the sexual prowess of those who sample her at the auction....more