Wow, poor Bob. And also, ew. True friends will always tell you that something is wrong with you. Because honesty is the best trait on a friend. And theWow, poor Bob. And also, ew. True friends will always tell you that something is wrong with you. Because honesty is the best trait on a friend. And the rest of the people are a bunch of bitches and assholes. Lesson of the day. Fin....more
Now this is how you portray homosexuality in a children's book. Kids ask questions all the time, there's no need to sugarcoat or lie. This book is perfNow this is how you portray homosexuality in a children's book. Kids ask questions all the time, there's no need to sugarcoat or lie. This book is perfect to show to your kids or for discussions. It helps that the rhyming scheme and the pictures are so cute!
There's not much to say to say about this book: A collection of fairy tales from the Wizarding world of Harry Potter written by (the fictitious) BeedlThere's not much to say to say about this book: A collection of fairy tales from the Wizarding world of Harry Potter written by (the fictitious) Beedle the Bard. If you have read the Deathly Hallows, you know this one.
My favorite stories have to be: The Warlock's Hairy Heart and The Tale of Three Brothers. Just wonderful.
And this book couldn't be complete without Albus Dumbledore! At the end of each story he gives his commentary.
And by the way, I will never forget this: No witch has ever claimed to own the Elder Wand. Make of that what you will.
WHAT. THE. FUCK???!!! This is a children's book? WHAT???!! Who in their right mind wrote this piece shit?
*searches author* Oh, that's really nice. A "homWHAT. THE. FUCK???!!! This is a children's book? WHAT???!! Who in their right mind wrote this piece shit?
*searches author* Oh, that's really nice. A "homosexuality-healer" and an "ex-gay". Really, really nice. BULLSHIT!! I call bullshit on you, Mr. Richard A. Cohen!! You can't "cure" homosexuality, you know why? BECAUSE IT'S NOT A FUCKING DISEASE, DAMMIT!!
Okay, so this kid is upset that his parents are fighting. His mother spills all her problems on him (WHAT MOTHER DOES THAT? IT'S NOT HEALTHY FOR THE KID!!). All he wants is parental love, dammit!! And then Uncle Pete arrives.
He is the only person that cares about Alfie. Oh joy! This is becoming heartwarming!
I feel really, really, really, really bad for laughing at the picture. But, seriously, look at Uncle Pete's face! Just look at it!
Anyway . . .
Alfie still craves for his dad's love (Why don't you just talk to him, you idiot!). By the time he became a teenager, kids were calling him a "homo" or more accurately, "Hey, faggot!" Oh wow. That was actually IN a children's book. I can just imagine a little kid asking his/her parents after reading this book: "Mom, Dad, what's a faggot?" Alfie doesn't what this means. So, he goes to a counselor and asks him about it. Note that Alfie didn't go to the authorities to get his creepy uncle arrested for sexual abuse. Instead HE goes to a counselor because he is doubting his sexuality. What a really wonderful message. The counselor explains to him that he isn't gay, he just missed his Dad's love and was taught wrong things by his uncle. The counselor also said that it wasn't his fault that his uncle took advantage of his need for Dad's love. Okay, so let me get this straight. Creepy pedophiles fuck children because they're taking advantage of the lack of love in their lives and not because there's something sick and disturbing deep in their minds? Look, even if Alfie's relationship with his dad was fine, his uncle was still going to rape him. You know why? Because he's a pedophile. End of the story. Okay that's not it . . . The counselor ALSO said that because he didn't experienced affection from his father, he was looking for closeness with other boys, to fill the need for his Dad's love. So, gays are gays because they didn't have parental love? Fuck this. What a way to paint homosexuals in a really bad light, Cohen!
And then, the counselor talked to Alfie's parents and their fights are gone! Alfie's dad started spending more time with him (Fishing, actually). Hooray for delayed communication! The counselor also talked to Uncle Pete. Uh-oh . . . Did he get arrested? Did he get thrown into jail? No! The only thing he did was to cry and apologize. Everything was forgiven! WHAT THE FUCK? That's not the way it works, Cohen! Have you ever talked to a real rape victim? I actually don't know many, but I doubt that they're going to forgive their rapist just like that. It takes some time to heal the wounds, you know? But then again, it actually doesn't matter in this story because Alfie is not gay. What a relief! So that's what he was really worried about? His sexuality? Dude, your uncle sexually abused you repeatedly. Worry about that! And at the end, Alfie met Nancy, got married, got kids, and lived happily ever after. THE. FUCKING. END.
Lessons that Alfie's Home taught kids: "Remember kids. You're not gay! You were just lacking a father figure and so you look for comfort in men!", "Dysfunctional families can easily solve all of their problems in just a few short therapy sessions", "Homosexuality is a problem that must be cured, you're not really gay - just confused", "Being gay is the result of being molested as a child (What if he'd been molested by his aunt?)", "Child molestation isn't a crime that you need to go to jail for; just apologize!" and let's not forget: "Gay equals pedophile".
I pity the parents who actually bought this book for their kids and thought it was educational. Parents, if you want your kids to be informed about incest and sexual abuse, just talk to them. I'm sure they'll understand. This horribly written, homophobic book is only going to brainwashed your kids into thinking that homosexuals are the result of sexual abuse or parental abandoning. Homosexuality isn't a disease. It only means that that person likes someone who is the same sex as him/her. That's it. There's no need to panic.
Cohen, I despise you. And this book, too. If I could give you .000000000000000 stars I would. The ignorance burns....more
I'm so going to read this to my future kids.(With Samuel L. Jackson's narration as guidance). Shhh . . . *whispering* It could be our little secret . .I'm so going to read this to my future kids.(With Samuel L. Jackson's narration as guidance). Shhh . . . *whispering* It could be our little secret . . . GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP!!...more
There's cheesy, girly books that you can't help but enjoy as guilty pleasures . . . and then there's the crappy, childish ones.
Gossip Times Three is aThere's cheesy, girly books that you can't help but enjoy as guilty pleasures . . . and then there's the crappy, childish ones.
Gossip Times Three is all about betrayal . . . over nothing. Sure, Bess dates Zack, Abby's long-time crush. But so what? Abby never expressed her crush for him . . . at least not enough anyway. And there's Cristy, who I think she's only there to be pathetic and pick sides. I wanted to strangle every single of these characters. Including the narrator (A.K.A. Gilda), but I'll tell you about that later.
The writing of Gossip Times Three was atrocious. So much telling rather than showing and unnecessary info-dumping in between paragraphs. Sometimes, I'd notice bad writing with other books, but they didn't infuriate me like this book did. The writing is so bad, that every word looks like it was just plastered on the paper with no emotion. Despite being a small book, it wasn't easy to read because of the sudden change of info-dumping and character drama. That happened on every single paragraph. And if I see the number three written like THIS again . . . I mean, come on!! THREE THREE THREE!! It got annoying! This book almost made me dislike my favorite number. Almost. And the excess of brackets "()" dragged the story to hell.
I was perplex by the extreme stupidity of the three girls. They made drama over the smallest things and whine and cry over nothing! Even though Bess broke up with Zack at the middle of the book, Abby was still whining about Bess and her actions! Get over it, you irritating imbecile! And Bess is very self-absorbed, even her sister told her what she was doing was wrong. Where's my metal chain?
The Narrator irritate me non-stop. She treated her audience like they were stupid, always telling them to check the last chapters, because she thinks they forgot the events that were happening in this book. I don't why but, when I was reading her narration, I pictured her with a nasal, Valley girl voice. Which made things worse. Her attempt for being witty was a disaster. Naming some of the minor, non-existent characters like "Er-ick" and "(boo-hiss) Jonas" wasn't even that clever. Not even a little bit cute. Stop. Please. I'm begging you. Oh, and what a surprise that The Narrator was actually Gilda, Bess's sister. I did not see that one coming. >__> Bitch, please! It was obvious since page 1!
At page 89, the author herself, Amy Goldman Koss, made a cameo appearance! Oh, isn't that adorable? The author got herself into the story as a "famous novelist"! Ha, ha, ha. NO. Just no.
There was no character growth , no plot, and nonsensical conflicts. I recommend you to STAY. AWAY. FROM. THIS. BOOK. Unless you like sappy, predictable books, I'm not going to stop you.
I had a hard time deciding on rating this book. I didn't know if I wanted to give it 3 stars or 4 stars. Then, i finally decided with 3.5 stars.
NormalI had a hard time deciding on rating this book. I didn't know if I wanted to give it 3 stars or 4 stars. Then, i finally decided with 3.5 stars.
Normally when I expect to read pink, little book like this one, I don't expect the tone to be dark even if the back of the book already said that it was. Eating disorders and death. What a great theme for children who needs to have their eyes open for the real world.
Isabelle Lee(Cool name, by the way) is a thirteen-year-old bulimic. Ever since her dad died two years ago, she, her mother, and sister has been grieving. Isabelle wants to be perfect like the most popular girls at her school. That's what leads her to throw up. When her sister, April tells her mom about her bulimic business, she's sent to a Therapy Group. This could had been your typical eating-disorder recovery if it wasn't because of Ashley Barnum, the most popular girl in school. What is she doing here? She's beautiful and perfect, she doesn't have any problems. Or does she? Isabelle discovers that the exterior is not always what it seems and that everybody suffers of their own insecurity.
I wasn't expecting Perfect to be good. It was quick and easy to read but still affected me somehow because . . . well just because. I found Isabelle irritating at first, but at the end you start feeling sympathy for her. And Ashley is a very interesting character. Not because of her looks, but because she also suffers the same kind of demons some young girls face. (view spoiler)[Her mother is very strict with food, her dad isn't home most of the time, and her parents are facing a divorce thanks to her dad's little "adventures". (hide spoiler)]
I also found Isabelle and Ashley's throwing-up encounters very disturbing.
Perfect has a very satisfying ending, leaving you with some hope for the characters.
A must read. ["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>["br"]>...more