9/10 .... Lizzie, our protagonist, is a modern minded 15 year old woman, and I do mean woman, stuck in an era and town not capable of understanding her...more9/10 .... Lizzie, our protagonist, is a modern minded 15 year old woman, and I do mean woman, stuck in an era and town not capable of understanding her lifestyle and strong mind. She is a feminist in a time when that kind of thinking and behaviour was not only discouraged but even categorized as a mental illness. Violet, her older sister, is the picture of femininity and correct social graces and is, of course, devastatingly embarrassed by Lizzie's complete disregard of proper etiquette. However, Lizzie could give two shits about her own reputation, Violet's reputation or the reputation of the family.
Alys, Always is a novel about a manipulative woman named Frances who schemes her way to the top of the professional and social ladder. I...moreMay, 2012 5/10
Alys, Always is a novel about a manipulative woman named Frances who schemes her way to the top of the professional and social ladder. In doing so she lies and cons everyone around her, taking advantage of every situation. Not one person in her life, family, coworkers or "friends," catches on to the deception. You can't really call someone a friend if you have scammed them from the very beginning, can you? Anyways, so far it sounds like the plot of a delicious betrayal filled with twists and backstabbing atrocities BUT (and I am sad to say this is one but of many) the book overall was a draaaaaag.
The Domino Effect is a coming of age story about Danny Rorro, an Italian kid from Queens who just can't seem to catch a break. Now I HATE the phr...more7/10
The Domino Effect is a coming of age story about Danny Rorro, an Italian kid from Queens who just can't seem to catch a break. Now I HATE the phrase coming of age but until there are better synonyms than fecundity and virility it will have to do. Anyways, we follow Danny through his high school life as he struggles with the common teenage annoyances: shitty schools, unstable friends and painful romances. Ugh, I'm so glad high school is over. *
The book is unique in the way it's organized. It starts with the first three years of Danny's high school life, with each chapter representing a separate year. The events go by quickly but we get a detailed understanding of Danny's family and school life that sets us up nicely for the main part of the book: his fourth year at Hamden Academy. The rest of the book slows right down and is the conclusion of Danny's high school/adolescence.
Danny's father, though not a main character in the book, was my favourite. At a time when Queens was struggling to accept the new immigrants moving into the neighbourhood, Danny's father embraced them, made friends and even spoke to them in Spanish. He taught ....
Well, this has never happened to me before. I am confused as hell, which doesn't feel totally bad, but I also feel like I've read a book I'm not intel...moreWell, this has never happened to me before. I am confused as hell, which doesn't feel totally bad, but I also feel like I've read a book I'm not intelligent enough to understand. It's exactly how I felt after watching the movie Donnie Darko…...confusion mixed with the overwhelming feeling that I was so close to grasping a concept so profound but that my feeble mind couldn't/wouldn't be able to fully absorb its true meaning.
It's like waking up from a dream so vivid that it takes you a moment to realize that you are awake, and when you focus on the details they make just enough sense that you get goosebumps but not enough sense that your conscious mind can unravel the overall meaning. This explains exactly how I feel right now.
Now this sounds bad, but I'm not sure it is.
The first chapter of Four D is a complete mystery to me. It almost put me into an early grave, I kid you not I almost didn't make it through. It was like reading
...Mr. Nick has quite the baggage. He shows up on Lily's doorstep one night, bloodied and disorientated, in need of some serious downtime- and not the...more...Mr. Nick has quite the baggage. He shows up on Lily's doorstep one night, bloodied and disorientated, in need of some serious downtime- and not the sexy kind. So Lily helps him out, and allows him to hide out for a while until she can assess whether or not he is a threat. Lily's baggage is just as heavy as his, as her need to help strangers has put her in some shady shit as well. Their shared history of questionable judgement creates the perfect bridge for the two to bond. Like a good recipe, love needs a cup of murder, a dash of drug cartel and a pinch of sexual assault. I told you the plot was great. ...
This gem of a novelette is a delicious 69 pages of steamy narrative. The main character is a woman named Kip, who is successful in life but not in lov...moreThis gem of a novelette is a delicious 69 pages of steamy narrative. The main character is a woman named Kip, who is successful in life but not in love. Her fantasies all centre around an old flame named Dylan who took her virginity and then spread the story around their high school. Nothing like "whore" being yelled at you during your valedictorian speech to ruin any fond memories you may have had of your senior school years. Despite her resentment of him she still uses the blue eyed hunk of man meat as lead male in her solo love sessions…eight years later. Chapter one ends beautifully with an intense masturbation scene in an SUV. Here's a little glimpse:
"To hell with hesitation! She’d wriggle out from under him and demand that he get naked, now. No, in fact, she’d peel his clothes off under the Christmas tree herself, like a kid on Christmas morning hyped up on cocoa and candy canes. Kip hadn’t been fucked—really fucked—like she’d wanted it in a long, long time. And, damn it, this was her fantasy and Dylan would be lucky if he got out it without suffering from exhaustion. He owed her."
She actually pulls over in a snow storm to rub one out on her way to her family's cabin for Christmas. She's spending Christmas there alone with her pink dildo, to drink wine, eat comfort food and diddle in peace. That's self-pleasuring dedication (I love this woman). After buying a Christmas tree and getting set up she realizes that she has no firewood and desperately tries to find someone in town who will deliver on Christmas Eve in a blizzard… and then the fun begins.
I love romance books. You always know what you are going to get; the delicious internal struggles of an awkward woman and rugged man who fight and dou...moreI love romance books. You always know what you are going to get; the delicious internal struggles of an awkward woman and rugged man who fight and doubt their burning passions for one another until they both snap and rip each other's clothes off. Throw in a dash of plot, a pinch of insecurity, a cup of sexual tension and stir in meddling families, physical danger and, of course, boners and you've got yourself a romance.
The Other Guy's Bride had all of the above romance-book qualities with a historical and exotic flare. The plot is rich and well developed… that's right, a romance with a plot! Ginesse Braxton, the awkward, stubborn, accident prone but very intelligent protagonist comes from a long line of famous Egyptologists. The story unfolds on her way to Egypt to find the lost city of Zerzura. She steals a woman's identity to gain an escort across the desert to discover the legend and hopefully make a name for herself based on her achievements and not her family background. Her escort, of course, is dangerous and handsome and almost hopelessly damaged. Their relationship is built on lies from the start, I mean the title tells us the dilemma: The Other Guy's Bride. Jim Owens, our yummy half American escort, believes that Ginesse is actually Mildred Whimpelhall who he was entrusted to bring back to her fiancé, and major ass, Lord Pomfrey....
Finally a fairy tale for grown ups. Want a good bedtime story that will make you laugh with wet panties? This is the book for you. With 39 pages The P...moreFinally a fairy tale for grown ups. Want a good bedtime story that will make you laugh with wet panties? This is the book for you. With 39 pages The Princess and the Penis is the perfect length (ahem) for you to read in bed before you tuck yourself in. It has a familiar story line: a beautiful, kind and vurtuous princess, an overprotective father and a gigantic phantom penis… wait, what? Yep, you heard me. This is more than your knight-in-shining-armour fairy tale. With chapter titles like A Lump in the Rump, The Phantom Phallus and The Wacky Wizard, this book is hilarious and saucy from start to finish. I actually laughed out loud as I read. A very witty take on an old fashioned story that would make your grandma blush.
I'm always happy when I read a second book by an author that I enjoy as much as the first. This is not a naughty fairytale remake, but it is as funny...moreI'm always happy when I read a second book by an author that I enjoy as much as the first. This is not a naughty fairytale remake, but it is as funny as The Princess and the Penis. I was laughing out loud while I was reading, plus the ending was a total shock.