I can't do it anymore. I tried and failed miserably. I went through an entire bag of mini Snikers and a whole Hershey pie, not to mention a box of NerI can't do it anymore. I tried and failed miserably. I went through an entire bag of mini Snikers and a whole Hershey pie, not to mention a box of Nerds, and I still couldn't freaking finish this damn book. But it is definitely not my fault. This book was simply atrocious. Everything about it was wrong and I can honestly say I don't know how I made it through the first half. I liked that the protagonist was not a push-over with the requisite mean girl that tried to bully and intimidate her (bravo for that!), even though it was for a boy , but she did allow herself to be pushed around by a guy just because he was beautiful and her personality was still incredibly annoying. She wasn't believable in any of the emotions she portrayed throughout the novel and I never truly believed her grief. Reading the world through her was not enjoyable either. Her literary voice grated against my mental ears and I know Ali is the kind of girl I would not get along with, so I could not cheer or actually care for her. The same goes for Kat. Sweet Lord, that girl was annoying. Now, that's the kind of girl I'd love to wipe the floor with. I won't even talk about the rest of the stereotyped members of this stupid, stupid book, but I will say Cole was one of the biggest and creepiest jerks I've ever had the misfortune to read about. The romance was sick and ten sorts of wrong. A guy's chain is covered in blood and he has a reputation for beating up students and there's even a rumor going on that he beat up a teacher? He freaking growled at you the first time he saw you and then he possessively inquired about your relationship with a guy after just one pseudo-conversation, followed by manhandling you into his car? Yeah, so, so sexy. I know why his chain was covered in blood, that could be seen from a mile away, but a girl just meeting him, completely unaware of everything that's going on should've had enough common sense to have all of her warning bells and red lights starting up at that point.
What pisses me off the most isn't the whole twist on the zombie thing; with that I could deal. It wasn't even the preachy vibe I was getting from the book or the slight submission of women evident in some of the word choices and attitudes of characters in the book. I could've even moved on from the annoying slang, and trust me, that's a pretty hard thing to ignore in this book. But what I absolutely hated is the fact that this is being promoted as an Alice's Adventures in Wonderland retelling. It is not and to call it that is an insult to the original book itself, which happens to be my favorite childhood story and still one of my favorite books. There's nothing about Carroll's book in here and the author is obviously just trying to cash in on the splash that Tim Burton left with his movie adaptation. This book is a slap in the face to every reader that loved Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and eagerly and desperately waited for this book to remember their love for the original and celebrate its magnificence with a new and fun-sounding twist.
Don't get me wrong. Even if this book hadn't been wrongly dubbed as a "retelling", it probably would've still been atrocious and utterly awful. There's nothing good about this book, nothing realistic or engaging about the characters, nothing truly fascinating about the concept, nothing romantic about the emotional relationships and nothing inspiring about the writing. This is, without a doubt in my mind, one of the worst books I've read this year and my absolute biggest disappointment in years. I won't be reading the sequel, nor will I look for anything else that this author publishes....more