This is one of my most favorite books... ever. I read this novel before I watched the movie and being a John Grisham fan I was expecting something ver...moreThis is one of my most favorite books... ever. I read this novel before I watched the movie and being a John Grisham fan I was expecting something very different - but was not disappointed in the least bit. This novel had me laughing so hard and so consistently. This is a must read for anyone who loves to laugh, trust me, it does not disappoint. :)(less)
"I told my boss that I had a book inside of me, and that I needed to get it out even if I had to squeeze it through my vagina. Because that’s exactly...more"I told my boss that I had a book inside of me, and that I needed to get it out even if I had to squeeze it through my vagina. Because that’s exactly what the world needs. A book squeezed from my vagina."
Jenny Lawson, also known as The Bloggess, is an internet sensation that I only recently became aware of. I’m not quite sure how I survived in life without her hilarious stories to be quite honest. I guess it should be mentioned for those with delicate sensibilities that Jenny cusses a lot, but considering you’re visiting my blog I would expect you’re used to that from me by now.
This book is absolutely fucking hilarious but it’s that type of funny that is only funny when it doesn't happen to you. Like when Jenny talks about that time she walks into a deer carcass. Or when her dad brought home a talking squirrel only to find it was actually a squirrel puppet and her dads hand was shoved up inside its dead body. Or when Jenny brought home her future in-laws to meet her folks and her dad was out back boiling animal skulls. Or when she practically overdosed on laxatives and a burglar was shoving notes to her from under the bathroom door except it ended up being her cat. (I literally almost fell off the treadmill at the gym laughing at that scene. People were looking at me with serious concern.) But seriously. What horrible things to have to live through. But since I didn't they were some of the funniest fucking things I have ever heard.
"Oh my God, calm down, Darwin. Don’t get all crazy just 'cause I threw a vampire monkey wrench in your faulty Jesus-zombie logic."
All of the back and forth verbal sparring between Jenny and Victor was the absolute freaking best but I could go on and on with my favorite scenes. So what the fuck, I will! Like when she asked the nurse if they could make her cesarean scar the shape of a lightning bolt so whenever she had menstrual cramps she could pretend Voldemort was close. Or when she purchased a giant metal chicken (named it Beyonce), put it in front of her front door, rang the doorbell and ran so that she could scare her husband. You cannot make up funnier shit.
"It’s an anniversary gift for you, asshole. Two whole weeks early. FIFTEEN YEARS IS BIG METAL CHICKENS."
This is a book made for the sole purpose of enjoyment. Because you will laugh, I guaran-fucking-tee it. But the bottom line is this book only goes to show that those crazy moments in life are the character building moments that make us who we are, for better or worse, so you might as well embrace it.
If I've (hopefully) convinced any of you to read this, I’ll let you know right now that you absolutely MUST listen to the audio. You’re totally missing out if you don’t. The sound effects were the freaking best and I can’t imagine reading this book without them. There was the cocking shotguns, the crazy clucking chickens and Jenny’s singing introductions and an odd assortment of other sound effects that had me non-stop rolling with laughter. Whenever I finish an audiobook I immediately delete it from my phone and move right on to the next one. But this one stayed put because whenever I’m in need of a gut-busting laugh I’ll always have this on hand to get the job done.
"In short? It is exhausting being me. Pretending to be normal is draining and requires amazing amounts of energy and Xanax."(less)
The Storyline Agnes is not your normal chick-lit heroine. The fact that she’s known as ‘Cranky Agnes’ could give you an idea. The fact that she’s used...moreThe Storyline Agnes is not your normal chick-lit heroine. The fact that she’s known as ‘Cranky Agnes’ could give you an idea. The fact that she’s used a frying pan in more ways than just cooking (I’ll give you a hint, one guy now has a metal plate in his head) could also give you another idea. There’s also an incident with a meat fork but I won’t spoil the fun for you. Or maybe it’s the mental conversations she has with her therapist.
”Fuck you,” Agnes said, bent over the edge of the cake. Angry language, Agnes. Fuck you, too, Dr. Garvin.
I think it’s a combination of everything, actually.
Agnes leads a quiet, simple, life as a food writer engaged to a quiet, simple man named Taylor. Her quiet, simple life takes a sharp 180° the day that she’s held at gunpoint for her dog. Yes, she’s held at gunpoint because they’re trying to steal her dog. Her life is soon thrown into even more upheaval when a hitman, Shane, is sent to protect her. People keep coming after Agnes, trying to steal her dog, trying to kill her, but who’s sending them? What follows is a rollercoaster ride that’s entirely way too much fun.
"Somebody might be coming to the house who might be dangerous." "Really?" Agnes said. "Because that almost never happens here. With advance notice. Should I get my frying pan?"
Final Thoughts Agnes is going down as one of my favorite book characters of all time, definitely. She’s a single girl, who loves to cook for her friends, she’s preparing to hold a wedding at her house, and she’s a food writer… I mean, at face value she’s just a normal girl. Agnes cannot be taken at face value and that’s what I loved most, the fact that I was completely surprised at how crazy and lovable she was all at the same time.
This book was downright hilarious, was extremely enjoyable, the characters were all amazing (I especially loved Shane), and… why exactly have I never read anything by this author before? Will definitely be correcting this, pronto. (less)
Lucky O’Toole is back in book 2 to handle more problems as the head of Customer Relations at the Babyl...moreInterested in more of my reviews? Visit my blog!
Lucky O’Toole is back in book 2 to handle more problems as the head of Customer Relations at the Babylon in Las Vegas. The action starts from page one with Lucky attempting to handle an overturned semi-truck that has not only blocked the entrance to the Babylon but has managed to dump its cargo: a load of bees. The following day, the body of Numbers Neidermeyer, an infamous bookie, is found floating in a shark tank and Lucky’s friend Jeremy Whitlock is the primary suspect. To top off her ‘trending towards fabulous’ week is news that her mother Mona, local brothel owner, will be auctioning off a young woman’s virginity.
One of things I loved in ‘Wanna Get Lucky’ was that the mystery was fun and exciting and Deborah Coonts failed to disappoint in ‘Lucky Stiff’. I was surprised at the final outcome; I certainly failed to see it coming. Lucky was still an enjoyable character that kept me entertained with her snarky sense of humor. The one thing I missed was her strong independence…When Teddie left to jump-start his music career she was constantly fretting about him leaving her, him finding someone new, etc. I found that she balanced her relationship with the rest of her hectic life much better in book one.
These are good as a stand-alone or as a series. The ‘refresher’ that the author gives in each book is enough to bring you sufficiently up to speed. The ending of ‘Lucky Stiff’ didn’t leave off with a cliffhanger but managed to leave me with enough to look forward to the next Lucky O’Toole story. (less)
I can’t remember the last time that a book made me laugh till I cried and made me feel like if I didn't stop reading right this second I just might we...moreI can’t remember the last time that a book made me laugh till I cried and made me feel like if I didn't stop reading right this second I just might wet myself. I think I timed this read at the perfect moment. I’m stuck at home on Friday night working from home… fortunately work is slow so all I have to do is sit here and… sit here. So I decide I’m going to start ‘Bad Taste for Boys’. My Friday night did a 180° to the point where I’m actually enjoying ‘working’ from home right now. :D
Keep in mind, this book is meant to be funny… there is no seriousness involved, there is no world building, there are zombies, and NUMEROUS hysterical lines that had me dying to share them with someone.
Kate Grable is the student trainer for her school’s football team. When Kate finds unmarked vials in the Coach’s office she immediately thinks he’s giving illegal steroids to the players in order to try and recover their losing season. Later that night at a party with her classmates, Mike, a football player, collapses and appears to be dead. As Kate examines him prior to the EMT’s arriving she finds a bruise on his arm that looks suspiciously like an injection site. Thinking that he’s dead and fearing the worst she’s scared out of her mind when Mike suddenly jumps up from the ground and proceeds to grab her butt. When she regains her senses and takes a good look at Mike there’s something about him… something’s different and she doesn’t know what. That’s when he kisses her suddenly... and takes a chunk of her lip!
Being gnawed on had pushed me over the edge. Mike had always been a tool, but not the kind of tool who bit people when he had the munchies.
It’s all up to Kate and a few of her friends to find the antidote in time to prevent the entire town from becoming mindless flesh-eating zombies!
This book is highly recommended for anyone in dire need of a good giggle. :D Interested in more of my reviews? Visit my blog!(less)
Fun, highly entertaining read for when you’re in that kinda mood. There’s no dramatic (or even realistic) world-building, there’s no real plot develop...moreFun, highly entertaining read for when you’re in that kinda mood. There’s no dramatic (or even realistic) world-building, there’s no real plot development, so if you’re in the mood for some serious novel you are definitely looking in the wrong place. This is the book when you’re looking for a good time and want to read some real funny fluff.
Lizzy is a pastry chef who makes some seriously fabulous cupcakes with an average and fairly normal life until she meets Diesel. Lizzy is informed by Diesel that she’s an “Unmentionable” and that she can detect magical objects and he needs her to locate them for him.
“Did you know you were an Unmentionable?” “No. I thought bras and panties were unmentionables.”
As Maja warned me from the very beginning: “I hope you like cupcakes. And monkeys.” Suffice it to say, the word cupcake appears 125 times in this novel. I had one major cupcake craving by the time I was done. Big as in:
Now that’s a cupcake.
The monkey’s (or unicorn if you’re Wendy :D) name is Carl and, well… Carl is hilarious. He’s not a freaky talking money or anything, but he loves cheez whiz, froot loops, and he loves flipping people off.
There’s also Hatcher, but he’s kind of a freak. He’s some geek who insists on dressing in medieval garb which does in fact include a sword. And then there’s Cat 7143. Yes, that’s his name. He has a glass eye, half a tail, and he’s apparently a ninja.
There’s the obligatory bad guy, Wulf, and the required hot guy, Diesel. All of these great characters are all in search of the seven stones which happen to contain the seven deadly sins. This is the first in the series, and I’m assuming it will only be 7 in the series, but I can’t wait for the next book! The ending was cute and left a smile on my face.
Interested in more of my reviews? Visit my blog!(less)
‘A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland From Being a Burden on Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Benefici...more‘A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland From Being a Burden on Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Publick’ otherwise known as simply 'A Modest Proposal' is anything but modest.
'I shall now therefore humbly propose my own thoughts, which I hope will not be liable to the least objection.
I have been assured by a very knowing American of my acquaintance in London, that a young healthy child well nursed, is, at a year old, a most delicious nourishing and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricasie, or a ragoust.'
This satire was said to have been written in response to the heartless response to Irish poverty and the policies of the leaders at the time. ‘A Modest Proposal’ goes into extreme detail on how selling infants after the age of one will be beneficial to society which was quite humorous, indeed; however, as a satire it was obviously meant as a mockery and I do believe it hit the mark. (less)
Okay so I'll admit, the first time I saw this book I was immediately skeptical. I saw that it was a free e-book though so I decided to give it a shot....moreOkay so I'll admit, the first time I saw this book I was immediately skeptical. I saw that it was a free e-book though so I decided to give it a shot.
The princess being in complete and utter denial of what she was doing absolutely hilarious. Simply put? This book was outrageously funny. (less)
A bedtime book for parents with a catchy title. I read about this and wanted to get my hands on it immediately. This book was hilarious and so honest....moreA bedtime book for parents with a catchy title. I read about this and wanted to get my hands on it immediately. This book was hilarious and so honest. I made the mistake of reading this at work - there were a few outbursts involved. Lol Highly recommended if you've ever had to deal with a small child that just would NOT go to sleep. (less)
Never would I have thought I'd enjoy reading about the drama of a 14 year old girl. Georgia is hilarious and reminded me of a younger, British version...moreNever would I have thought I'd enjoy reading about the drama of a 14 year old girl. Georgia is hilarious and reminded me of a younger, British version of Daria. Between Georgia dressing up as an olive, shaving off her eyebrows, her Scottish wild-cat Angus and her crazy baby sister who calls everyone a tosser... well Georgia is a new favorite. (less)
I love theoatmeal.com. Makes the long days stuck in cubicle hell much more bearable. If you've never heard of theoatmeal.com then you must be living u...moreI love theoatmeal.com. Makes the long days stuck in cubicle hell much more bearable. If you've never heard of theoatmeal.com then you must be living under a rock. Fix this pronto.
As for this book? I would have to call it the most hilarious book I've read this year. Yay for The Oatmeal.(less)
Being a huge fan of the Simon's Cat videos that are posted on youtube, I had to see if this book was just as good. It was FUNNY... but... I did love t...moreBeing a huge fan of the Simon's Cat videos that are posted on youtube, I had to see if this book was just as good. It was FUNNY... but... I did love the videos so much more. Still worth taking a look at though. :)(less)
Considering I have a ton of ARCs I should really be catching up on, and considering how much I love Charley, I really should have known bette...more4.5 stars
Considering I have a ton of ARCs I should really be catching up on, and considering how much I love Charley, I really should have known better than to tell myself, "Just one chapter!" But it didn't even take a chapter, I was hooked by the opening paragraph.
'I sat watching the Buy From Home Channel with my dead aunt Lillian and wondered what my life would've been like had I not just eaten an entire carton of Ben & Jerry's Chocolate Therapy with a mocha latter chaser. Probably about the same but it was something to think about.'
Oh, Charley. I missed you.
Charley was funny and full of snark (as usual) but after the incident from the last book she has a new sense of reality. She's still fragile and recovering mentally and hasn't even left the house in two months when the book begins. It takes a lot of work from everyone close to her (and a few margaritas) to get her close to normal, or as normal as Charley has ever been.
'Surely my macking on some guy in an insane asylum wouldn't hurt him. He'd been living with his stalker, for heaven's sake.'
Her love life is full of drama as usual and Donovan makes a (small) appearance to complete the love triangle going on. Strangely, this is one love triangle that doesn't cause a negative reaction from me. I'm quite fond of both boys. :) But, it was just a small appearance and Reyes is front and center in her life (as it should be.) The two butt heads for a short time until Charley can forgive him for his actions from book 3. He had an attitude problem for the vast majority of the book but he made amends for that. And then some.
Charley's sister Gemma plays a larger role this time around and I loved what she brought to the story. Charley and Gemma have finally made amends and for the first time in their life they're actually acting like sisters. One of their funniest moments was when everyone was concerned that Charley wasn't sleeping so Gemma and Cookie resort to drinking margaritas (Cookie-a-ritas). The morning after conversation between Gemma and Charley: "Have you seen my pants?" "Speaking of which, how did you get home without them?" "I borrowed a pair of your sweats. I ran into a convenience store with them on. I talked to neighbors out in their yard when I pulled up. And only after I got inside did I realize they had 'Exit Only' written across the back." "You stole my favorite sweats?" "I wanted to die." I think I just died of laughter.
Charley finally gets some answers in this installment! What she's capable of, why she's here on Earth, and even why Reyes calls her Dutch which has bugging me FOREVER. I won't ruin it for you but it was quite enlightening. Really opens up future storylines and how it's going to go. As usual, this is one series I'm constantly pining for and cannot get enough of. Start the countdown for book 5 "Fifth Grave Past the Light" due out July 9th, 2013. Only 9 months. *sigh* __________________________________________________________
My rating: 4 of 5 stars A copy of Simon's Cat vs. the World was provided to me by Akashic Books/Library Thing for review purposes.
Simon's Cat began as...moreMy rating: 4 of 5 stars A copy of Simon's Cat vs. the World was provided to me by Akashic Books/Library Thing for review purposes.
Simon's Cat began as a series of YouTube videos and quickly turned popular for their hilariousness and how accurate the depictions were of how cat's truly are. The first Simon's Cat video was uploaded over 5 years ago, on March 4, 2008. It's one of my all-time favorites. You can watch it here.
While the books aren't nearly as hilarious as the videos, they are still entertaining and fun to flip through for a good laugh. Simon's Cat vs. the World are single page illustrations detailing various encounters from visits to the Vet, holiday outfits, discovering the vividness of HD TV and even fireworks.
In addition to that, there was also a short section in the back that details how to draw a few of the animals that feature in his books.
And my favorite part? A whole page of adorable stickers.
The best thing about these books is just how realistically the illustrations showcase the shenanigans of cats and what cat owner's constantly have to deal with. Simon's Cat is highly amusing and a source of good quick fun. Recommended for any cat lover and anyone who just enjoys a good laugh.(less)