Never would I have thought I'd enjoy reading about the drama of a 14 year old girl. Georgia is hilarious and reminded me of a younger, British version...moreNever would I have thought I'd enjoy reading about the drama of a 14 year old girl. Georgia is hilarious and reminded me of a younger, British version of Daria. Between Georgia dressing up as an olive, shaving off her eyebrows, her Scottish wild-cat Angus and her crazy baby sister who calls everyone a tosser... well Georgia is a new favorite. (less)
"I told my boss that I had a book inside of me, and that I needed to get it out even if I had to squeeze it through my vagina. Because that’s exactly...more"I told my boss that I had a book inside of me, and that I needed to get it out even if I had to squeeze it through my vagina. Because that’s exactly what the world needs. A book squeezed from my vagina."
Jenny Lawson, also known as The Bloggess, is an internet sensation that I only recently became aware of. I’m not quite sure how I survived in life without her hilarious stories to be quite honest. I guess it should be mentioned for those with delicate sensibilities that Jenny cusses a lot, but considering you’re visiting my blog I would expect you’re used to that from me by now.
This book is absolutely fucking hilarious but it’s that type of funny that is only funny when it doesn't happen to you. Like when Jenny talks about that time she walks into a deer carcass. Or when her dad brought home a talking squirrel only to find it was actually a squirrel puppet and her dads hand was shoved up inside its dead body. Or when Jenny brought home her future in-laws to meet her folks and her dad was out back boiling animal skulls. Or when she practically overdosed on laxatives and a burglar was shoving notes to her from under the bathroom door except it ended up being her cat. (I literally almost fell off the treadmill at the gym laughing at that scene. People were looking at me with serious concern.) But seriously. What horrible things to have to live through. But since I didn't they were some of the funniest fucking things I have ever heard.
"Oh my God, calm down, Darwin. Don’t get all crazy just 'cause I threw a vampire monkey wrench in your faulty Jesus-zombie logic."
All of the back and forth verbal sparring between Jenny and Victor was the absolute freaking best but I could go on and on with my favorite scenes. So what the fuck, I will! Like when she asked the nurse if they could make her cesarean scar the shape of a lightning bolt so whenever she had menstrual cramps she could pretend Voldemort was close. Or when she purchased a giant metal chicken (named it Beyonce), put it in front of her front door, rang the doorbell and ran so that she could scare her husband. You cannot make up funnier shit.
"It’s an anniversary gift for you, asshole. Two whole weeks early. FIFTEEN YEARS IS BIG METAL CHICKENS."
This is a book made for the sole purpose of enjoyment. Because you will laugh, I guaran-fucking-tee it. But the bottom line is this book only goes to show that those crazy moments in life are the character building moments that make us who we are, for better or worse, so you might as well embrace it.
If I've (hopefully) convinced any of you to read this, I’ll let you know right now that you absolutely MUST listen to the audio. You’re totally missing out if you don’t. The sound effects were the freaking best and I can’t imagine reading this book without them. There was the cocking shotguns, the crazy clucking chickens and Jenny’s singing introductions and an odd assortment of other sound effects that had me non-stop rolling with laughter. Whenever I finish an audiobook I immediately delete it from my phone and move right on to the next one. But this one stayed put because whenever I’m in need of a gut-busting laugh I’ll always have this on hand to get the job done.
"In short? It is exhausting being me. Pretending to be normal is draining and requires amazing amounts of energy and Xanax."(less)
My rating: 4 of 5 stars A copy of Simon's Cat vs. the World was provided to me by Akashic Books/Library Thing for review purposes.
Simon's Cat began as...moreMy rating: 4 of 5 stars A copy of Simon's Cat vs. the World was provided to me by Akashic Books/Library Thing for review purposes.
Simon's Cat began as a series of YouTube videos and quickly turned popular for their hilariousness and how accurate the depictions were of how cat's truly are. The first Simon's Cat video was uploaded over 5 years ago, on March 4, 2008. It's one of my all-time favorites. You can watch it here.
While the books aren't nearly as hilarious as the videos, they are still entertaining and fun to flip through for a good laugh. Simon's Cat vs. the World are single page illustrations detailing various encounters from visits to the Vet, holiday outfits, discovering the vividness of HD TV and even fireworks.
In addition to that, there was also a short section in the back that details how to draw a few of the animals that feature in his books.
And my favorite part? A whole page of adorable stickers.
The best thing about these books is just how realistically the illustrations showcase the shenanigans of cats and what cat owner's constantly have to deal with. Simon's Cat is highly amusing and a source of good quick fun. Recommended for any cat lover and anyone who just enjoys a good laugh.(less)
Oh, cat books. As hard as I try and stay away from your infinite silliness, it's forever a losing battle. Like air boxing.
But their cuteness cannot be...moreOh, cat books. As hard as I try and stay away from your infinite silliness, it's forever a losing battle. Like air boxing.
But their cuteness cannot be denied. Admit it. Cats can be crazy cute.
But... of course they have their moments. Moments where one can only stare in horror and wonder what monster you brought home to live with you.
They're basically just a furry paper weight that lacks any true purpose.
But what would do you think your cat would say to you if it could speak? Or if it could even write you a letter? Well, this book is the answer to all your questions! Why they need 12+ hours of sleep, why they have such a strange love for grass, and it even discusses their dislike for our perfume. Yes, all the questions we've always wanted to ask are now answered. Cute kitty letters with even cuter kitty pictures... what more could you ask for. (less)