An absolutely fantastic exposition of human behavior:how to understand our natural tendencies and, with those tendenciBrings clarity to human behavior
An absolutely fantastic exposition of human behavior:how to understand our natural tendencies and, with those tendencies in mind, how to work with others in such a way as to optimize our mutual happiness. A must-read for any leader or anyone wanting to improve the quality of their relationships...more
A simple but powerful introduction to asserting yourself. The emphasis on mindset and relationship with oneself was particulaQuick read for the basics
A simple but powerful introduction to asserting yourself. The emphasis on mindset and relationship with oneself was particularly illuminating. "At every moment, you are training those around you how to treat you"...more
I love pretty much everything written by this man. This seemed more stream-of-consciousness than his other offerings--which was both good and bad. ItI love pretty much everything written by this man. This seemed more stream-of-consciousness than his other offerings--which was both good and bad. It felt like he just woke up and wrote to his audience some good advice that was on his mind (I believe the book was taken from his newsletters). Good refresher on some neglected concepts....more
An interesting story about an Italian script writer whose employer (the Pope) fell out of favor and his later book-hunting exploits. I found it intereAn interesting story about an Italian script writer whose employer (the Pope) fell out of favor and his later book-hunting exploits. I found it interesting to hear this side of history, though not as monumental as it was made out to me....more
From the "compounding principle" to memory recall as a "stage play"it is obvious that Metivier has refined and tested this material overgreat content
From the "compounding principle" to memory recall as a "stage play"it is obvious that Metivier has refined and tested this material over a long time. I found many concepts highly useful. A great help to anyone learning a language or wanting to improve their memory. ...more
Fantastic read. Further is shaping my new view that I, and all of us, don't actually know how we would react and behave in many different situations.Fantastic read. Further is shaping my new view that I, and all of us, don't actually know how we would react and behave in many different situations. The slightest, seemingly-innocuous variable can have profound effects on the behavioral paths we take.
Key Takeaways * We don't know the 'real value' of things. We take cues by comparisons of things we think are similar 'enough'. * Supply and demand explains only a fraction of what really goes on in economic decisionmaking. * The only way to make sure we don’t give in to temptation is to make it impossible before the temptation arises.
In his own words, Ariely summarizes the work nicely:
“we usually think of ourselves as sitting the driver's seat, with ultimate control over the decisions we made and the direction our life takes; but, alas, this perception has more to do with our desires-with how we want to view ourselves-than with reality”
However, he continues,
We can actively improve on our irrational behaviors. Start by becoming aware of our vulnerabilities. If you're planning on a purchase, ask yourself: - How did that habit begin? - What amount of pleasure will you be getting out of it? - Is the pleasure as much as you thought you would get? - Could you cut back a little and better spend the remaining money on something else? Train yourself to question your repeated behaviors.
Other interesting tidbits: -The "endowment effect": when we own something, we begin to value it more than other people do. -The discussion of social and marketplace norms is also worth mentioning. -Mere contemplation of standards affects our ethical behavior.
Some final quotes:
“Standard economics assumes that we are rational... But, as the results presented in this book (and others) show, we are far less rational in our decision making... Our irrational behaviors arevneither random nor senseless- they are systematic and predictable. We all make the same types of mistakes over and over, because of he basic wiring of our brains." pg. 239
“Ownership is not limited to material things. It can also apply to points of view. Once we take ownership of an idea — whether it’s about politics or sports — what do we do? We love it perhaps more than we should. We prize it more than it is worth. And most frequently, we have trouble letting go of it because we can’t stand the idea of its loss. What are we left with then? An ideology — rigid and unyielding.” ― Dan Ariely, Predictably Irrational: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions ...more
Not a self-help book. Think more along the lines of "personable coach that will feel what you're feeling alongside you and then validate those feelingNot a self-help book. Think more along the lines of "personable coach that will feel what you're feeling alongside you and then validate those feelings"
Anyway, it was a bit simple. Kinda mushy and touchy-feely in parts. But so authentic. Set aside the research, and let's just talk kind of book. I enjoyed it. It has more than a few great insights. Some of the standouts:
"The heart of compassion is really acceptance. The better we are at accepting ourselves and others, the more compassionate we become." 16-17
3 conditions for hope: 1. An ability to set realistic goals 2. And ability to figure out how to achieve our goals, including developing alternatives 3. A belief in ourselves
"Shame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging" 39
"The problem is that when we don't care at all what people think and we're immune to hurt, we're also ineffective at connecting... staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection." 53
"Advertising is an over $200 billion a year industry. We are each exposed to over 3000 ads a day. Yet, remarkably, most of us believe we are not influenced by advertising. Ads sell a great deal more than products. They sell values, images, and concepts of success and worth, love and sexuality, popularity and normalcy. They tell us who we are and who we should be." (Quoting Jean Kilbourne, p68-69)
"the more entrenched and reactive we are about an issue, the more we need to investigate our responses." 95
"When we don't give ourselves permission to be free, we rarely tolerate that freedom in others." -123
But, as usual, my favorite part came in the form of a quote: "The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself." - Anna Quindlen...more
I was surprised by how impressed I was by this book. It started off like it was going to be just another rah-rah business book, but this book has deptI was surprised by how impressed I was by this book. It started off like it was going to be just another rah-rah business book, but this book has depth. From ways to project charisma, to how to remember names and even resources like the different types of jokes, there is a lot of great content here.
This book is for anyone who wants to see the sales and persuasion techniques that are well-thought through.
Here is a great quote, though not even typical of the best stuff in here, it just one of the first I have transcribed: "Neophyte sales people believe that the buyer is rewarding them by giving them an order. If you think that way, you are probably communicating meeting this to your prospects. Superstar salespeople project that the buyer is fortunate to have them there to solve their problems and serve them better."...more
Extremely illuminating. Opened up a whole new world and several subcultures I was completely ignorant of. A book about expertise and how memory works,Extremely illuminating. Opened up a whole new world and several subcultures I was completely ignorant of. A book about expertise and how memory works, Foer makes an enjoyable, 100% readable venture on the mind and how, in his words, "we all have remarkable capacities asleep inside of us. If only we bothered ourselves to awaken them."
Besides all the amazing memory tips, I got more than a few things out of this book:
1. Be more mindful (remembering only happens if you take notice) [So much of remembering happens at the moment of encoding, because we only tend to remember what we pay attention to. 159] "attention is a prerequisite to memory" 176. Have to be the type of person who remembers to remember. 2. The more you know, the easier it is to know more. Because of more possible associations (baker-Baker paradox), which is why experts are expert: they have increased the size of their 'memory web' by which they can catch new information. In other words, It takes knowledge to gain knowledge (baseball example--experts vs less avid fans). You can't have understanding without facts. 3. Ok plateaus/deliberate practice. Practice makes perfect? Why not improve typing when 'practice' hours per day? Because learning goes in three stages (cognitive, associative stage, and autonomous stage)When you want to get good at something, how you spend your time practicing is far more important than the amount of time you spend. 4. Creativity is about taking many disparate old associations (memories) and creating something novel, fresh, unique in the sense that those associations could only be combined because of your unique assembly of past memories.
Eye-opening. This is a book worth digesting. How many worthwhile thoughts have gone unthought and connections unmade because we have not fully developed our memories? ...more
I liked this book. It was my second read, and it was a lot more basic than what I gave it credit for. Nonetheless, it has some good questions to ask yI liked this book. It was my second read, and it was a lot more basic than what I gave it credit for. Nonetheless, it has some good questions to ask yourself. Two in particular stood out:
"What is your essence? What are you really about?" and, relatedly,
What is something that you have to do, or you'll burn up? Something that you think is costing the world because it does not exist in the right quality?...more
Nothing really stood out to me in this book. It was one guy's experience, just relating what happened to him. Not really that helpful to me, as far asNothing really stood out to me in this book. It was one guy's experience, just relating what happened to him. Not really that helpful to me, as far as value-added. Skip....more