It's hard to believe it's possible, but this book is WORSE than the abominable Twilight books.
I never thought I'd have anything positive to say about...moreIt's hard to believe it's possible, but this book is WORSE than the abominable Twilight books.
I never thought I'd have anything positive to say about Stephenie Meyer's writing, but even though her Bella is mind-numbingly boring and self-absorbed, she's a far better character than the limp Grace in Shiver.
The main characters in Shiver are entirely one-dimensional and thinly drawn, the plot is apparently not much more than "girl loves wolf. wolf is boy. wannabe romeo and juliet scenario ensues." And the supporting cast of characters are simply cardboard cutouts labeled "girlfriend #1" "girlfriend #2" "mother" "father", etc.
All-in-all, it reads like a high-school student had the ill-conceived notion that Twilight should be rewritten for werewolf lovers. No thanks. I'll pass.(less)
Ugh. I feel I deserve some sort of medal for finishing this book.
I had my doubts about the Twilight series ever since I first heard of them a few yea...moreUgh. I feel I deserve some sort of medal for finishing this book.
I had my doubts about the Twilight series ever since I first heard of them a few years ago, but then more and more people I know who have actual taste started reading them and liking them. So I thought, what the hell? I like a good vampire yarn. I made it through all the Lestat chronicles, I'm a big Buffy fan, I even read a couple of those Sookie Stackhouse novels, so how bad can it be?
At first, with the first book, it was bad, but bearably so. Terrible writing, silly heroine, paper-thin plot, but I was entertained nonetheless. I spun through the 1st two books in a couple of days and decided maybe I would like the series after all, you know, in the way you once liked a Spice Girls song but would never admit it.
Of course, I had trouble adjusting to all the usual vampire "rules" going out the window, and found it laughable that the reason they can't go into the sun is because they sparkle. Really? Whatever. I guess I like my vampires a bit more less glittery. I could also do without constant desperate housewife descriptions of Edward's amazing beauty. God. We get it. He's prettier than her. He's prettier than Johnny Depp. He's really really pretty, and even his breath smells amazing. Enough already! I was tempted to be incredibly offended that a woman would write a character like this as if to say that Edward is the epitome of perfection, he's what every woman would want. It's just such a 13-year-old girl-type fantasy of what a perfect boyfriend would be like.
But I kept on going, still willing to give these new vamps the benefit of the doubt. Then I hit Eclipse and any remaining good will just got sucked right out. This book is ridiculously long -- there is absolutely no reason for at least half of it to exist. I'm at my wits end with Bella. It's all been said before, but I'm offended that the heroine has to be such an idiot. On and on and on with her stupid, self-absorbed, oh-my-god-i'm-a-danger-magnet chatter. Seeing things from only her damsel-in-distress perspective is excruciating. And the love triangle -- human, vampire, werewolf, is just so, I don't know, so meh. I just can't bring myself to care. At all. I have absolutely no reason to believe that anyone -- redneck high school boy, Indian werewolf, 19th century vampire, would be madly in love with Bella. Why? She's BORING.
And seriously, seriously? The vampire won't have sex with her until they're MARRIED? Gah! That just pushed me over the edge. I guess that's the Mormon in Meyer.
But apparently I am a glutton for punishment, bad writing, stupid storytelling, sad-sack vampires, idiotic heroines, and whiny werewolves, because I am slogging on to book #4.
I don't know what, exactly, I expected when I started this book, but it certainly wasn't a slow-moving, leaden story.
None of the characters in this bo...moreI don't know what, exactly, I expected when I started this book, but it certainly wasn't a slow-moving, leaden story.
None of the characters in this book are likeable, and they are all so stiff, it's hard to sympathize with them at all. It doesn't help that the cast is so huge... new characters are being introduced almost up until the very end. The author seems to treat his protagonists flippantly, and he doesn't even bother to give one of the characters a name, calling her simply "The girl with the shaved head."
I found the book difficult to read, mostly because I just didn't care what was happening. The storylines are convoluted, jumping back and forth in time, but not in any coherent way.
You'd think it would be hard to find a story set in Las Vegas and featuring a big cast of punks, runaways and strippers boring. But Beautiful Children is boring and tired, and I'm so happy to be done with it!
If you have to work this hard to get through a novel, you'd hope there would be some payoff somewhere. But I'm just feeling disgusted that I forced myself to finish it. There are so many other, better, books I could have been reading!(less)
Apparently if you have the slightest stench of celebrity about you, you can get anything published, including completely juvenile and trite poetry tha...moreApparently if you have the slightest stench of celebrity about you, you can get anything published, including completely juvenile and trite poetry that should have stayed in a pretty pink diary under lock and key somewhere.
It's been a long time since I read this, but the main thing I remember is that apparently if you have sex and you're not married, it's death by dragon...moreIt's been a long time since I read this, but the main thing I remember is that apparently if you have sex and you're not married, it's death by dragon for you.