Story about two cripplingly shy love-birds told from everybody's point of view, except theirs. Cute, right?
Only, not so much.
After what seemed to be tStory about two cripplingly shy love-birds told from everybody's point of view, except theirs. Cute, right?
Only, not so much.
After what seemed to be the millionth POV of an utterly random stranger (with no connection whatsoever to the two leads) who gushes about how special the two are, and how there is just this chemistry between them and how they are so sure that the two are just meant for each other, I decided to throw in the towel.
So, SO much telling, absolutely no showing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. None.
While I enjoyed the author's previous book, "You had me at hello", this one made me mad enough to throw the book at the wall (ifWhat a disappointment.
While I enjoyed the author's previous book, "You had me at hello", this one made me mad enough to throw the book at the wall (if I was reading a physical copy of it, anyway). Positively RIDDEN with clichés!
- Fat girl bullied at high-school? Check. - Bullies are super-skinny and popular girls with brains smaller than that of an ostrich? Check. - Girl has a crush on the most popular boy in school? Check. - Popular boy doesn't giver her time of the day and makes fun of her because she's fat? Check. - Girl grows up, loses baby fat, gets a makeover and becomes super-hot?! Check check. - Girl can't find a decent man to date who is sensitive and understanding and caring and not at all a pervert who likes to discuss bedroom antics on the very first date? Check. - Girl has two (a guy and a girl) super-loyal, super-funny and super-awesome best friends who alone know and love THE REAL HER? Check. - Girl runs into high-school crush again who suddenly finds her OMGATTRACTIVE because she's all skinny now? @#$&-ing check. - Girl hates crush because he was an asshole to her while at school but, oh! He's so hot and maybe she still has feelings for him? CHECK.
I could go on but I stopped reading at this point because it became too excruciating and cringe-worthy.
ARGH! NO! NO! NO! IF I HAVE TO READ ONE MORE ASININE CHAPTER, WRITTEN FROM A FIVE-YEAR OLD'S POV, ON THE MUNDANE THINGS THEY DO IN THE ROOM ALL DAY, WARGH! NO! NO! NO! IF I HAVE TO READ ONE MORE ASININE CHAPTER, WRITTEN FROM A FIVE-YEAR OLD'S POV, ON THE MUNDANE THINGS THEY DO IN THE ROOM ALL DAY, WITHOUT HAVING THE PLOT PROGRESS EVEN REMOTELY, I'LL... I'LL...
So there's this city, right? Every person in that city is a reincarnated soul, right? Except for this one gGah. No no no no no NO!
What was this mess?
So there's this city, right? Every person in that city is a reincarnated soul, right? Except for this one girl, let's call her Bessie (I forget her name), who is a new soul - she was born in place of a to-be-reincarnated soul. So everybody hates her, including her own mother. So, the girl leaves home on her birthday to find out the truth behind her birth and what went wrong with the other soul, then runs into some shadow monster, then falls into a lake and gets rescued by this guy (let's call him Bob). And then they talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. About nothing. In very stilted dialogues. (I started skipping pages after this). Something something about a Heart, how Bessie thinks EVERYBODY hates her, how Bessie thinks there's something odd about Bob, but oh, she might be falling in love with him...followed by more something something...old libraries, dragons, Bessie's Dad...
I stopped reading right about there. And all this happens in the first 30 pages.
In summation (only because I want to post a gif of the beautiful, beautiful, Benedict Cumberbatch) -
You guys were right. I was wrong. I could not bring myself to pick up this book everyday and read a bit. In fact, I found myself coming up with excuseYou guys were right. I was wrong. I could not bring myself to pick up this book everyday and read a bit. In fact, I found myself coming up with excuses to NOT pick it up. That's when you know it's a lost cause....more
A bizarre plot with a terrible beginning. Without any sort of background we are plunged into action. It works for Riordan but unfortunately not here.A bizarre plot with a terrible beginning. Without any sort of background we are plunged into action. It works for Riordan but unfortunately not here. Could not bring myself to read past the first 20 pages.
P.S - Mr. Patterson? Kids do NOT speak like that. You just sound like an adult trying too hard to talk in a way he thinks kids these days might talk. Bad sentence formation just now, you say? Yeah, that about sums up your book....more
Written using extremely simplistic language with stilted and repetitive dialogues that made the story sound at times like a bad play, and at others liWritten using extremely simplistic language with stilted and repetitive dialogues that made the story sound at times like a bad play, and at others like a last-ditch attempt infomercial to sell a product that no one wants to buy. Did not hold my attention long enough to make me want to continue beyond the first few pages....more
Twenty pages in and I was already regretting my choice of picking this book up. Now, after one hundred whole pages of this trash, I can'And I give up.
Twenty pages in and I was already regretting my choice of picking this book up. Now, after one hundred whole pages of this trash, I can't take it anymore.
How do I begin to explain this atrocity? One Day recounts the story of Emma and Dexter in a never-before-seen format - each chapter is the just the one day - July 15th - of each year of their lives. This could have had so much potential but the execution is just...agonizingly painful.
Now, Emma is a whiny, bitchy, insecure hipster who would much rather wear glasses than contacts, loves to feel sorry for herself WHEN THERE'S NO NEED TO and does NOTHING to fix her mess of a life, reads Dostovyesky and the like, shoves her taste for GOOD LITERATURE down Dexter's throat and, basically, cannot be happy unless she's fighting for a CAUSE.
Dexter, on the other hand, is a whiny, douchey, insecure nymphomaniac who is loaded with cash and no idea what to do with it, likes being made to constantly feel that he's AWESOME, has no clue about what he wants in life - all he wants is job which he can "brag about in a bar" and doesn't involve hard work - and, basically, cannot be happy unless he has a woman in his bed with him.
The biggest mystery in the pages I read, is HOW in the world these two fell for each other! The first time we meet them, they are strangers who just hooked up after running into each other at a party. Already Dex is thinking of leaving as soon as Em falls asleep, while she, on the other hand, is wondering to herself is he's THE ONE. A year after that, Dex is out travelling the world and sleeping with random women, while Em is working in D-grade plays wondering where her life is heading (No idea why she cant get herself a real job even though, as we are constantly reminded, she has a DOUBLE DEGREE). They are still in touch and have "feelings for each other" (when did that happen?)
A year after that, Dex is in Greece and STILL sleeping with random women, while Em has moved on from her dreams of becoming a playwright and now works in a greasy, run-down Mexican restaurant (why and how did she get here?) in the middle of nowhere - still no sign of a REAL JOB. A year after that, Dex is in India and trying to become a professional photographer while Em is STILL WORKING AT THAT DAMN RESTAURANT even though she hates it there (why she just doesn't pack up her bags and leave, is never made clear). A YEAR AFTER THAT, Dex is in the same town as Em, working as a TV presenter (apparently "he realized photography was not for him, and besides, "I'm a TV presenter" sounded more impressive"), flaunting women in front of the love-lorn Em, who, by the way? Mexican Restaurant.
You see? It's utterly maddening! Since each chapter is a year apart, lots of the "in between" details are missed out which is why it feels like there is absolutely no connection between the chapters. Though, the author tries hard to bridge the gap. Too hard.
Sample this example - In one chapter, we are introduced to Ian, Em's new coworker, who asks her out but she declines as she is not interested and the chapter ends abruptly after that. In the beginning of the next chapter, the author reminds us - Hey! The two chapters are connected! It's the continuation of the same story! My story IS progressing but I'm not going to explain any of it to you. No, really! I'll prove it to you by not at all understating it and hitting you on the head with it! Look, look! -- "The other staff scoffed. 'Why is it always me?' moaned Ian. 'Because you do it so beautifully,' said his best friend Emma"
Subtle, Mr.Nicholls, very subtle.
Moaning and groaning, I forced myself to read on - much like how Harry forces Dumbledore to drink the potion in the Cave - and after, about a hundred pages, when they are at a nudist beach by accident and Dex is trying to convince Em to take her clothes off while she's saying no (this goes on for a bit), I read this -
She leant forward, put her hand on his wrist. 'I think we should tell each other something that the other person doesn‘t know.' 'What, like a secret?' 'Exactly, a secret, something surprising, one a night every night for the rest of the holiday.' 'Okay. You first.' 'No, you first.' 'Why me first?' 'You've got more to choose from.' And it was true, he had an almost bottomless supply of secrets. He could tell her that he‘d watched her getting dressed that night, or that he‘d left the bathroom door open on purpose when he showered. He could tell her that he‘d smoked heroin with Naomi, or that just before Christmas he‘d had fast, unhappy sex with Emma‘s flatmate Tilly Killick; a foot massage that had spun horribly out of control while Emma was at Woolworths buying fairy lights for the tree. But perhaps it would be better to go for something that didn‘t reveal him as shallow or seedy, duplicitous or conceited. He thought for some time. 'Okay, here goes.' He cleared his throat. 'A couple of weeks ago at this club, I got off with this guy.'
And THAT, ladies and gentlemen, is when I stopped reading, because my brain exploded. ...more
As much as I ADORE fantasy fiction, this one was way too juvenile even for me. And I don't mean the story - premise was good - but the language! It feAs much as I ADORE fantasy fiction, this one was way too juvenile even for me. And I don't mean the story - premise was good - but the language! It felt like the author had written the book keeping ONLY 8 year olds in mind. It was way too simple, with too much "telling" and not enough "showing", to the point where I began to feel mildly insulted at the patronizing way the author was treating my imagination. Couldn't finish....more