This book teaches the fundamentals of how to relate to and interact with the little people that rule our lives.
It touches on six main topics:
1. HelpinThis book teaches the fundamentals of how to relate to and interact with the little people that rule our lives.
It touches on six main topics:
1. Helping Children Deal with Their Feelings by listening with full attention, acknowledging their feelings and giving it a name (so this is what 'frustration' feels like?), and simple strategies for helping them accept and deal with these.
2. Engaging Cooperation by describing the situation that is causing the problem, giving information as to why it is not acceptable, using a word instead of a long sermon to draw their attention to the problem to begin with, and talking about the way it makes *you* feel (It makes me angry when you...). Lastly, the authors recommend writing a short note for older children along the same lines as this sometimes makes it easier for them to process in an unemotional way.
3. Alternatives to Punishment. Stating disapproval and your expectations, giving a choice, pointing out ways to be helpful, showing the child how to make amends etc.
4. Encouraging Autonomy by showing respect for a child's struggle (It can be hard to tie shoelaces...), not bombarding them with too many questions, not being too quick to give answers etc.
6. Freeing Children from Playing Roles (i.e. casting them as stubborn, scatter brained, etc.) by looking for opportunities to show the child a new picture of herself, modeling the behavior you would like to see, and reminding them of times when they were very flexible and focussed as the opposite of the previously mentioned labels for example.
A lot of this may seem familiar but there are many fine nuances that can make a big difference as to the effectiveness of the recommendations. Fortunately, the book is filled with little cartoons, letters from parents, and hypothetical situations to help solidify the concepts and you will get plenty of opportunity to practice by completing the included questionnaires.
There are too many permutations of personality types in even the smallest families for one book to answer all questions and work in all situations. This one suggests a fair and balanced approach, perhaps best summarized by the following quote:
"...we can't go too far wrong if we take time to listen to our children's feelings; or talk about our own feelings; or work in terms of future solutions..."...more
This is a great book if you are looking to start an exercise program at home with just a bench and a pair of dumbbells. The first part of the book conThis is a great book if you are looking to start an exercise program at home with just a bench and a pair of dumbbells. The first part of the book contains some useful background and theory on exercise, physiology, how to build muscle etc. while the second half is dedicated to a large number of full body exercise programs to follow. The authors also provide some guidelines on how to exercise safely and avoid injury if you suffer from various conditions (like muscle impingement syndrome for example).
After three years, I still use it as part of my exercise program every week....more