I've been taking this very slowly - about 2 passages per day. The first entry stated something that I've been screaming about for years now. I don't e...moreI've been taking this very slowly - about 2 passages per day. The first entry stated something that I've been screaming about for years now. I don't expect to agree with everything in the Tao, but I definitely think I'm going to get a lot out of this.(less)
For years, I swore I'd never marry. I said this not because I didn't want to settle down, not because I honestly *wanted* to be a spinster for the res...moreFor years, I swore I'd never marry. I said this not because I didn't want to settle down, not because I honestly *wanted* to be a spinster for the rest of my days (although I know some "spinsters" who have led very awesome, wonderful, ENVIABLE lives and it's by no means a curse) - I said I'd never marry because I knew *exactly* the sort of man I'd be happy spending the rest of my life with, and I honestly believed with every fiber of my being that he didn't exist. And if that was the case, I'd spend my days alone because I wasn't settling for any less than what I knew would make me happy.
Imagine my surprise when David came along. Even though I was thrilled to be getting married, I was also terrified. And marriage (or the prospect thereof) can be absolutely terrifying for some women. If you are, like me, ferociously independent and have no interest in becoming somebody's "little wifey", no interest in giving up your independence along with everything that makes you who you are, marriage can be (in spite of the joy and excitement) more frightening than death for some women.
This book addresses many of these fears and was a huge step in the realization that marriage is what you make it - not necessarily the cookie-cutter cliche you've built up in your head. Marriage doesn't have to be what it was for your parents or anyone else in your family. It doesn't have to mean giving up your independence, giving up your interests and everything that makes you who you are. More importantly, if you're a newlywed or a bride-to-be and you are terrified of what lies ahead - you are not by any means alone. It's okay to be scared. It's okay to have second thoughts. This book uses the input of many other brides, newlyweds and those long married to help you sort through everything that's going through your head - including methods of managing the relationship.
It's all very subjective, of course - not everything in this book is helpful. Some things are glaringly obvious while others may not resonate at all with you. But still, it was worth the read and the simple knowledge that I wasn't the only bride in the history of the known universe to be scared of what was going to happen after vows were made and the piece of paper was signed.
Highly recommended for brides-to-be and newlyweds.(less)
Being a bookseller, we often get advanced copies of books. This was one of them, so I actually read this before it came out. The prologue was gorgeous...moreBeing a bookseller, we often get advanced copies of books. This was one of them, so I actually read this before it came out. The prologue was gorgeous and striking to me, but the rest of the book failed to match it.(less)
Call it chick-lit if you will, but I like Amy Tan. The Hundred Secret Senses is one of my favorite books (I should read it again), and I picked up the...moreCall it chick-lit if you will, but I like Amy Tan. The Hundred Secret Senses is one of my favorite books (I should read it again), and I picked up the Bonesetter's Daughter years ago and never got around to reading it until now.
This book centers largely around the relationship between Ruth Young and her elderly Chinese mother, LuLing. LuLing has been diagnosed with dementia, and while caring for her, Ruth happens across some pages written in Chinese in what she recognizes to be her mother's handwriting. Ruth has them translated and discovers that some things LuLing has been saying recently, which Ruth thought to be nonsensical product of the dementia (such as that her sister is not really her sister and that she is actually five years older than everyone thought), are actually true. Through the translation of her mother's story, Ruth discovers her mother's character, her origin and her own roots.
Tan's writing is emotionally effective. Like Ruth, as a reader you come to understand and even identify with LuLing. It even made me a little curious as to my own mother's life, or even my grandmother's life.
But as I remember thinking of the Hundred Secret Senses, I found the story taking place in years past more interesting and engrossing than the one taking place modern-day.
I have read better books, but I did enjoy this and I would recommend it to anyone who's read and enjoyed any of Tan's other work, or to anyone who finds themselves intrigued.(less)