Man is lured into participating in a super-secret medical trial. Man is unknowingly cloned, pumped with viagra an...more"You want to film me fucking myself."
Man is lured into participating in a super-secret medical trial. Man is unknowingly cloned, pumped with viagra and anti-anxiety drugs to lower inhibitions, then locked in a room with his clone. What happens next? Bow-chica-wow-wow.
So, is this a form of extreme narcissism? An odd kind of masturbation?
This was no different than getting horny watching gay porn; it was an appreciation for the male form. In this case, mine. And what's wrong with a little bit of self-appreciation?
...who hadn't fantasized about having sex with themselves?
Er, me. Hadn't even crossed my mind. But then, I'm not male.
Flashes of teenaged me straining in autofellatio -inspired yoga, desperately trying to suck my own cock ran through my head.
As far as I know, it isn't possible for women to achieve the same.
"...wouldn't it be more exciting to do something totally unique and impossible without science? For anyone not a twin," he hastily added with no hint of shame.
Is twincest common? Apart from male-female twincest depicted by George R.R. Martin in his A Song of Ice and Fire series and a male-female (who were unknowingly born male-male) in the "Identity" episode of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (based on the true story of David Reimer), I've not encountered many examples.
Although, I do remember watching one of those weird sex documentaries that featured a pair of female twins that performed live sex shows. And in effort to find them, my Google search brought up this interesting and sort-of relevant Slate article The Sex Lives of Conjoined Twins, and their agony aunt page entitled Brotherly Love.
The clone itself, is not born but made, fully formed from SmartLiquid and is an exact physical and mental, self-aware duplicate including all past memories up to the point of cloning. And are recycled when no longer needed.
"The clones are able to be repurposed, regenerated, and reconfigured for future use . Your model, so to speak, lasts as long as you are here and then as soon as we're done going over your study they are stripped and reset to default, only to eventually be improved and changed into someone else later."
While not made from flesh and blood, the clones appear to be somehow psychologically or computer-programmed:
“So you’re made for sex. Are you permanently hard all the time?” “By default, yes. I can control my erection though to be soft if you wanted.”
For some reason, I had the image of android Data and Lieutenant Natasha Yar from the "The Naked Now" episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation. She asks if he's "fully functional", he is, and he adds "I am programmed in multiple techniques. A broad variety of pleasuring."
"Inside of me is a guideline of sexual instructions that is guaranteed to make my partner orgasm, often several times in a single session. I match my training with your profile and adjust accordingly. Every session is a learning experience." "What about you? Can you get off?" "Of course. I'm just like you, only I can keep on going and going and going with no worry of a refractory period . Anything you tell me to do I do it. If you want cum I can have it for you on command. If you want me to blow you, I'm your man. Anything. You. Want."
On the possible future of human cloning:
"We're approaching the day when sex-clones become a real thing. That's not saying they aren't feasible today, but with enough time they will be advanced and cheap enough for everyone in the developed world with a desire to fuck a vat-grown-human to have the capability to do so and enjoy it. You can consider this market research."
Creating self-aware human clones with training or programming for the exclusive purpose of becoming sex workers is firmly in the realm of fantasy. Anything or anyone that is self-aware and is selfishly used, and possibly abused, as slaves, will have within them the ability to revolt and start an emancipation revolution, just as clone Somni-451 attempted to do Cloud Atlas.
Overall, the concept here is immensely fascinating. I expected a not-so-well-written, mildly titillating erotica, and while there were a few punctuation errors and word omissions, this didn't impact on my enjoyment of the premise nor the amusing writing style. Honestly, the sex is the least captivating aspect of this sci-fi short.
I'll leave you with a giggle-worthy quote:
Too much porn had skewed my judging of how big cocks were supposed to be. Sucking on this thing would be like taking a thick popsicle down your throat. It was daunting. I suddenly felt a strong sense of compassion and understanding for the women I had been with.
Anthony Weston encourages the use of representative examples and counterexamples, warns of the hazards of statistics (like I recently have), imparts t...moreAnthony Weston encourages the use of representative examples and counterexamples, warns of the hazards of statistics (like I recently have), imparts the importance of impartial and reliable sources, explains the correlational relationship between cause and effect, presents deductive reasoning in the words of Sherlock Holmes, preaches the value of librarians, and can teach a thing or two to Badly Behaving Authors.
Criticisms and suggestions, as always, are welcome. ~ Page x, from the Preface
Writers --at all levels--need feedback. It is through others' eyes that you can see best where you are unclear or hasty of just plain implausible. Feedback improves your logic too. Objections may come up that you hadn't expected. Premises you thought were secure may turn out to need defending, while other premises may turn out to be more secure than they seemed. You may even pick up a dew new facts or examples. Feedback is a "reality check" all the way around --welcome it. ~ page 64,Rule 38
The Some Common Fallacies chapter is excellent. The examples I run into the most:
One word: X-Factor. The sob stories 'appealing to pity as an argument for special treatment.'
"Everyone's doing it!" Sex (for teenagers). Brazilian waxes. iPhones. '...appealing to a person to go along with the crowd.'
As the author invites criticism, I have only one complaint: No forms of cognitive bias were included. Bias is explicitly mentioned once, during the introduction of section IV on Sources. I've tried to find a book that does include them and this was, in the end, the most likely candidate to cover this topic, so I'm a tad disappointed.
A Rulebook for Arguments really is what it says, a short and concise, but easy to understand, list of rules on how to construct a solid argument.
Recommended to everyone 12+, including authors of both fiction and non-fiction, for everything from a short and simple discussion to essays, oral presentations, and dissertations.(less)
Unconditional love and care for a child teaches him how to love, how to love his parent in return, and how to love his own child.
Case in point:
(Click...moreUnconditional love and care for a child teaches him how to love, how to love his parent in return, and how to love his own child.
Case in point:
(Click to enlarge)
My only criticism: When the mother visits her son's house in the middle of the night I expected an unknown, bleary-eyed woman screaming "Burglar!" lying next to him in bed. Possibly with smeared mascara and a strong whiff of tequila on her breath. Now that would've been realistic. And hilarious.
Thank you, Karen H., for recommending this heart-melting book to me.(less)
Completely confounding. An intriguing idea poorly executed. Even reading slowly didn't improve understanding. Beautifully written sentences were meaningless without much background or context.
I honestly didn't perceive the allegory; the library representing the universe, its books filled with information detailing everything within it, though in an incomprehensible manner - multiple languages represented in each volume.
Unending patience and a generous mood are required for this one. I possessed neither. I expected more from this 1001 author.
*South American (Argentina) read for the Dead Writers Society's 2014 'Around the World' challenge.(less)
An unconscious 30-year-old man was brought in to us by ambulance. His girlfriend had found him lying naked on the floor of his bathroom and called 999. Upon examination, he was found to have a large lump on his forehead and, strangely, several scratches on his scrotum. The lump was obviously from a fall of some kind, but we couldn’t work out the cause of the scratches until he’d woken up. He said he had been cleaning his bathtub while naked, kneeling on the floor beside the tub. His cat, apparently transfixed by the rhythmic swaying of his scrotum, lunged forward, sinking its claws into this deliciously pendulous target. The man wasn’t sure what had happened next, but clearly he’d jerked forward to protect his package and cracked his skull on the edge of the bath.
Chilli-filled vagina, unchoreographed slapstick, some harmless bestiality, many an ESA (Embarrassing Sexual Accident), fat nurse gets comeuppance, battered woman not actually battered... by a human - nothing is what it appears. You can't make this shit up.
One surgeon has removed from rectums: an unbroken lightbulb, a smashed champagne glass, a prosthetic arm, many toothbrushes, a large rubber ‘Hulk’ fist (and again, two years later), many eggs, and a stapler.
And I'm not sure why but losing an eel up the arse is more common than I'd originally thought.
(Click to see eel in human intestine story)
Also, penis augmentation - why?
An elderly male came in to the surgery with a steel cock ring stuck behind his scrotum and penis, both of which were swollen to four times their usual size (he told us with pride). I asked him how long he had been in this predicament, to which he replied, ‘Three days.’ I asked, ‘Why didn’t you come in sooner?’ His answer: ‘I could still pee, and the wife was happy...’
A warning to those that are sexually active and like a drink:
Rip it Up and Start Again
We were called to an attempted suicide in a student flat. A young couple had been drinking, had a fight, then made up, before falling into a deep sleep. The girlfriend had woken in the early hours, with the sensation that she was soaking wet. Turning on the bedside light and pulling back the covers, she was horrified to discover they were both drenched in blood, huge amounts of it.
She quickly worked out she was okay and it seemed her boyfriend had been driven to try and kill himself as a result of the fight the previous evening. He was unconscious. She called 999 immediately.
When we arrived she was hysterical. The bed was a mess. Like that scene in The Godfather. There was even blood on the walls. But something wasn’t right. We couldn’t find any incisions in his wrists or on his thighs. Although he was totally unconscious his pulse and breathing were normal.
After further examination, it appeared the source of the blood was around his groin area. But again no cuts. My colleague then had a brainwave. He peeled back the lad’s foreskin and sure enough, his frenulum (the piece of skin that runs between the foreskin and the head of the penis – also known by Paramedics as the banjo string) was completely ripped. There was a lovely gaping wound right up to the urethra. Believe it or not, a remarkably common injury when couples have sex drunk – caused by lack of lubrication.
You have been warned.
When the health professionals get to have a little fun:
A man was brought in with a bad case of concussion, which had resulted in extreme short-term memory loss. I’d walk into the room and tell him he had a concussion and he’d explain he had one when he was a kid. This was repeated every time I walked into the room. After about 10 times of doing this, I walked in and told him he had a concussion and he’d had one before when he was a kid. Mind blown. Priceless.
When you realise humanity is doomed:
I asked him if he’d been travelling overseas recently or eaten anything off or odd. This is what he told me: ‘Well, I was at a brothel last night and I may have swallowed some water in the communal spa they have there, would that count?’ And I had to treat this guy.
These two went viral a few years ago:
Fire in the Hole
‘In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake, but I was only trying to retrieve the hamster,’ Philip told colleagues in the Severe Burns Unit he’d been rushed to. Philip and his partner William had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong. ‘I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Gerald, our Campbell’s hamster, in,’ he said. ‘As usual, Will shouted, “Apocalypse!” – our safe word that he’d had enough. I tried to retrieve Gerald, but he wouldn’t come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract him.’ The match must have ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot out of the tube, igniting Philip’s hair and severely burning his face. It also set fire to Gerald’s fur and whiskers, which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestinal tract, propelling the hamster out like a cannonball. Philip suffered second-degree burns and a suspected broken nose from the impact of the hamster, while William suffered first and second-degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract. I never heard what happened to Gerald the hamster.'
Burned to be Wild
A woman was cleaning up the mess left by her hairy biker husband after he’d decided to strip his motorcycle engine on the kitchen table before putting the parts back together and taking it for a spin. One of the things he was using was a bowl of petrol (apparently it is great for getting rid of grease). She took this bowl and, not knowing what to do with the contents, decided to pour them down the loo. Her husband came back, lit a cigarette and, happy with his bike, went to the bathroom. As he did a wee he threw his cigarette end into the loo. The explosion brought his wife running upstairs, where she found him crumpled against the wall, having been blown backwards through the door, his hair, beard, eyebrows and pubes burnt off and his clothes smouldering. She dialled 999 and we came and took care of him. Hopefully he’ll remember to clean up his own mess in the future...
Do you know how long it took me to write this review? I read this aloud on Christmas Day. Too many quotes I wanted to include; half the book was copied here, and I had to cut it down.
To all the firefighters, paramedics, doctors, nurses, emergency call handlers, dentists and every other health professional, thank you for your service and your stories.(less)