I'm not sure what I am to say about this book. I've been putting off reading it for a long time now and I'm not really sure if I regret that or not.
AxI'm not sure what I am to say about this book. I've been putting off reading it for a long time now and I'm not really sure if I regret that or not.
Axolotl Roadkill is, ultimately, not much of a novel at all. Our protagonist, Mifti (btw, I googlechecked and that is not a name so take that as you will) is little more than an instrument for Hegemann to express her own frustration (infatuation?) with our world. At 17 (I think that's how old she was idk), her writing and points are utterly pretentious and this may well be what she was going for all along, Axolotl Roadkill has the trash chic appeal of old army boots over glitter leggings and it captures the teenage mindset quite well. Notably, the writing changes over the course of the book, from confusing but in its ability to confuse you admirable pseudophilosophing laced with grand words to a sort of bleak and while not particularly meager kind of quiet style.
It's not a very funny, happy or enjoyable story and while the gist of it may be overly familiar to experienced readers ("depressed" girl does a lot of drugs/has a lot of sex while contemplating life), the way it is presented here is actually kind of awesome. Hegemann drops names and brands like nothing else and it serves as an undercurrent to root this in reality. The frantic way especially the beginning was written makes it a little challenge to keep straight who was who and some things while hinted at will only open themselves to you in the middle of the book. Some things are actually never really explained at all and left for you to ponder over at the end of the book. There are parts were you can't discern who is supposed to be speaking and surreality pervades certain parts. I personally kind of feel the need to reread it.
Also, it has something I absolutely adore in books and pretty much everything else: (view spoiler)[a bad ending (hide spoiler)]. The title is, in retrospect, also surprisingly poignant.
I don't really feel like commenting on the plagiarism debate (like I said in one of my updates, she literally uses entire paragraphs from other books but she does credit them), only that the concept of intertextuality is the fucking funniest thing I've ever heard of.
Hello, I'm Rinoa and I'm guilty of reading Fanfiction.
Okay, so I've never read this book (haha, what is it even about? Sounds like a random mashup ofHello, I'm Rinoa and I'm guilty of reading Fanfiction.
Okay, so I've never read this book (haha, what is it even about? Sounds like a random mashup of Kingdom Hearts vocabulary. In French). Sorry.
What I did read though is Fire Crotch and the Friend Zone Virgins. Which is basically one of the best reads I've had in a loooooooooooooooooong time (and not just because I'm kind of an akuroku shipper, I promise!). I'm not a sappy person (name the movie, I didn't cry while watching it) and this had me on the verge of tears. Like, I actually had to surpress them. Like, I'm getting all misty-eyed thinking about it now.
It also kept me awake till 5am because I had to finish it in one sitting. I can't even remember if any other book ever did that to me.
Why aren't published books this good? Or better yet, why isn't this published?...more
2.5 stars for a terribly boring book with an ending that was actually kinda cool.
Ok, so from here on out, there be spoilers. Beware.
Cam: Wow, Luce is2.5 stars for a terribly boring book with an ending that was actually kinda cool.
Ok, so from here on out, there be spoilers. Beware.
Cam: Wow, Luce is in mortal danger again. We should tell her nothing about the situation at all and rather really confuse her by moving her to a new school. Daniel: ...and we should chain her to my basement. Cam: Righ- Wait, what? Daniel: Nothing. <_< Cam: But even though we said we wouldn't approach her, we still totally will, right? Daniel: Totally.
[We move on to Luce who is also moving. To California. And because this is California, her new school has to reside directly next to the ocean.]
Luce: Gee, I guess now that Daniel's gone, it's time I revert back to a partially socially healthy character and pay some attention to the other people in my close proximity. Good thing my behaviour is totally not obsessive at all. Shelby: Hi, I'm your roommate. I'll be a total bitch for the next 40 pages but then suddenly I'll behave like your best friend. Oh yeah, my boyfriend with A FREAKY, NEARLY NON-EXISTENT EYE COLOUR, I repeat that, A FREAKY, NEARLY NON-EXISTENT EYE COLOUR who was UNUSUALLY INTERESTED IN YOU, just broke up with me. Luce: So, do you think if I mention Penn three times and my other friends not at all that will be an accurate portrayal of a teenager's state of mind after a move? Shelby: Fck that shit, nobody cares about that anyway. They all just want to read about hot angel sex. Miles: Hi, I'm a guy friend which automatically equates to me being a love interest. Dawn and what's-her-face: And we're unnecessary.
Luce: Hey, I feel like dyeing my hair blond. Shelby: Okay. Dawn: Hey, now we don't look so alike anymore! What's-her-face: I think it looks good on you. Miles: You look beautiful with every hair colour. Daniel: WHAT IS THIS?! AN ACT OUT OF FREE WILL?! HOW DARE YOU, WOMAN! HOW COULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THAT, WHEN I LOVE YOU SO? Luce: But Daniel- Daniel: SILENCE! TO PUNISH YOU FOR THIS OUTRAGEOUS BEHAVIOUR, I'LL NOW FLY AWAY FROM THE CONFLICT AND LEAVE YOU ALONE WITH NO OPTION TO FIND ME!!!
[Back in school where it is sunny. Because this is California.]
Francesca: We're your teachers. I'm an angel and he's a demon. Steven: But don't worry, we'll never adress the tension that may create. Luce: Phew! For a moment there, I thought we'd actually have an interesting plot on our hands. ... Wait, does this mean evil is not only evil and good is not only good? Me is confuzzled. Shelby: Yes it does, moron. Luce: Despite this being a concept already quite aptly introduced in children shows such as Digimon (btw, you should watch that instead of reading this book, it's much more entertaining), I do not seem to be able to grasp it. Shelby: Like I said, moron. Luce: Hey, it's not my fault Daniel never tells me anything although I've got a right to know what I'm getting myself into. BTW, why the fuck did you keep kissing the past Luces even though you knew they were going to go up in flames? Daniel: Um... Look, a bunny! Luce: ... Daniel: Okay then, come here so we can make out. Luce: Oh yeah that's right, faced with my body's desires I for some reason confuse with true love, my rationality falters. I'm so sorry, it's just that I'm stupid. Daniel: That you are.
[For some reason, everyone is supposed to swoon now.]
Luce: Hey, emails from my friends and parents! Should I answer them? ... Nah. Lets go out instead although it's probably dangerous. Cam: Watch out, the Outcast (I do not even know if that's what they were really called but lets just pretend it is) who are NEARLY BLIND and therefore have a VERY PALE EYE COLOUR, are after you! Luce: That doesn't sound familiar at all. Cam: You really are dense, aren't you?
Miles: Hey, lets make out! Luce: SURE! Daniel: [in a whiny little girl's voice] How could you do that to me?! I will flee the conflict once again!
Lauren Kate: Oh fck, this book is like 90% over and nothing has happened yet. Um... Thanksgiving dinner!
EVERYONE [YES, THAT MEANS EVERYONE, THERE ARE LIKE 12 GUESTS AT THE DINNER AND FOR SOME REASON THIS DOESN'T BOTHER LUCE'S PARENTS AT ALL]: Yummy!
[The parents leave conveniently. The Outcast attack. Fighting goes down. Somewhere, Callie probably feels very brainfucked. But lets not care about that.]
Luce: STOP! It's me you want! Female Outcast: As you will, Kari- err, Luce. Come with us, because we need your help. You will not be harmed. Luce: Wait, then why is all this fighting going on? Couldn't you have just approached me and explained the whole thing to me like any normal person would've done? Phil: Lets not care about that now. Luce, come with me. Daniel: HEY, THAT'S MY LINE! Luce: I don't want to. Phil: But- Miles: SPARKLY UNICORN POWERS ACTIVATE! LUCE REPLIKA! Cam: AND SPARKLY ARROW OF AWESOMENESS! A LUCE HAS BEEN KILLED! I HAVE GAINED 150 EXPERIENCE POINTS AND LEVELED UP! Daniel:DUDE, YOU JUST KILLED MY GIRLFRIEND! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?! Cam: It's better this way. Daniel: HOW SO? WHAT DID THE OUTCAST EVEN WANT? Cam: Sheesh, stop asking all those questions. You're starting to sound like Luce.
Luce: You know what? Fck this shit! Fck not knowing what the hell is even going on! Fck you all telling me nothing! Luce, over and out. Me: I would really like to use that clapping and crying gif right now. Daniel: LUCE! I WILL FOLLOW YOU! ... ...and tie you to my bed. Cam: Wait, what?
**spoiler alert** Boy, Mary Hooper sure does love her poor-orphaned-young-girl-gets-a-new-job-and-mysterious-shit-happens-but-it's-all-good-and-she's-**spoiler alert** Boy, Mary Hooper sure does love her poor-orphaned-young-girl-gets-a-new-job-and-mysterious-shit-happens-but-it's-all-good-and-she's-rich-in-the-end-stories.
Don't bother if you read any of her other books, it's just more of the same. Disappointing. ...more